goodlifewrites

I knew when I started thinking about my fic that I would have some familial tension between Harry and his father. But initially, I was setting out to write a unique Hinny fic. Their relationship was the main point of the story, or so I thought. But at some point, I naturally gravitated to the question every writer should consider before outlining their story: what is my fic (story) about? And I don't mean what's the basic premise for the summary.

We learn about things like themes in English class, but I as much as anyone don't really consciously think about the depth of what I'm writing, whether its something for work or even a comment in a reddit thread. But we all have a point we are trying to get across. A deeper meaning than just words on a page.

I decided that I wanted to write a story about a father and son in conflict. It wasn't about just that. I think I perhaps clung a bit too much to the Hinny of it all for most of the fic, and if I could write it again, I think I'd include more Harry/James stuff. But ultimately, I felt that since canon Harry was faced with the expectations of the world upon him and no real control of his future (or even a future at all), it would be interesting to see what Harry in my world would do when he had more freedom to rebel against expectations from his father.

That was the underlying theme of my story, which is about how children coming into adulthood and plotting a path of their own, and how parents often struggle with that.

But the real point of this post is to bemoan how little fanfic writers ask themselves the question what is this story really about? Because that inevitable leads to additional questions: What am I trying to say with this story? What does this mean for these characters we all know? Why does this story need to be told, or does it?

Since its been asked, the idea I have banging around my head is a loose reimagining of the Bourne Ultimatum, where Harry suffers from amnesia and its revealed he's some super assassin type. But my original idea is to set it post Battle of Hogwarts canon. Unfortunately this creates an issue with how does Harry even get into that line of work, especially considering he's incredibly famous. How would he try to escape from his captors as an incredibly famous person?

Very much open to suggestions. Right now my thought is he uses his fame to gain access to high-profile targets but also disguises himself when necessary. Still struggling with what to do when he's on the run.

Any time you complete some sort of project, it's good to have a postgame assessment of things. The project is done and with that comes a sense of closure, except you still have all these thoughts and nowhere to put them. So I'm reactivating this blog just to get my thoughts on the end of this minor thing I did.

Writing the Potters and the Weasleys was difficult, not because of issues of writers block or anything like that. It was difficult because after the first few chapters, it simply became a chore to finish. I took nearly years long breaks at points just due to having little desire to open up the word document. Life was busy at times and slow at other points, but when it ebbed it wasn't as though I started banging out words. For me, it was all about the destination, not the journey. The journey sucked. It was like going antiquing in Maine with your parents when all you wanted was to get to the coast and see the whales finally.

I've noticed some of my favorite writers have similarly stopped updating fics they were working on or never bothering to start the long-awaited next installment. I wonder if its because life is getting in the way, they've run into a creative wall, or they've simply lost interest as I often have.

Outside approval certainly plays into it. We can all lie to ourselves that we write for just ourselves, but we also put it out to the public for consumption. There is indeed a little high you feel when someone praises something you created, warranted or not. But in my specific case, the kind reviews started at a high and then gradually slowed. By the time my fic concluded, it was a trickle. And that's on me for not consistently updating. If we go on the assumption that my story was good (which it might not be!), then it proves the point that quality alone does not lead to popularity. Consistent engagement is what drives views and the accolades that come with it. Surely if I was consistent here at least, I'd get more attention.

But we tell ourselves we don't write for attention, and that is probably true especially at the beginning. Yet we know its there and part of us wants it. Again, we publicly post these stories for a reason. So if I'm honest with myself, the ebbing of reviews must have played into my antipathy towards writing in some manner. I just want to be honest about that.

Writing fanfic is one of the least consequential things I've done in my life that still feels noteworthy and in need of reflection on. But it's not really a topic that has a natural avenue for spewing thoughts. This is the best we have.

Ideally, I'd like a conversation on my fic, where some people chime in with questions or comments like they often do for far more popular and accomplished writers. But absent that, I'll just post thoughts on different characters, themes, plotlines, etc as well as whether I plan on writing anything else (spoiler: likely no but i have ideas)

Lastly, I do want to thank everyone who stuck with the story and shared positive thoughts! I really was humbled (and sometimes the exact opposite) by people liking my writing. The best comments I got were people saying how well I got the characters, which was very important to me. Also, I must thank @thedistantdusk for being an awesome beta and soundboard. She's extremely busy yet still found the time to help me out. There are few fanfic authors who are genuinely strong writers who could carry a story without having the crutch of established characters and universes. Dusk is one of them.

If you believe abortion is actually the murder of a baby, then wouldn’t you support any and all efforts to prevent that from happening?

Not sure if anyone follows this page, especially since I haven’t posted in forever, but just wanted to give an update on the story.

The Potters and the Weasleys will be finished. I know I take forever to update but it doesn’t mean the story is abandoned. I envision that after this current chapter I’m writing, there will be two more.

I am about 5,000 words into the current chapter, have two specific scenes to write still and then I will send it to my awesome beta.  My writing process has essentially boiled down to moments of guilt for procrastinating so much on the story and trying to churn out a scene here or there. As I’ve said before, I don’t terribly enjoy the process of actually writing the words (prefer idea generation and outlining much more). So anytime I do decide to write, I’m fighting this natural dislike of it.

Lastly, I will try to post more here as it is a good medium for random thoughts and such, both HP related and issues outside of the fandom. So assuming I do post more here, it won’t just be HP content but likely much more political. 

When writing an AU, I believe an author should consider how much external circumstances would change a character from canon. The author should ask themselves what is inherent to that character and what parts of them are impacted by their environment. I asked this question for both Harry and Ginny, but Harry was the tougher one since his circumstances most notably changed in my AU.

I figured out quickly that Harry having a happy childhood with parents would probably make him more trusting of adults, which in turn might make him less likely to seek out answers on his own like in canon. But I still think Harry would have a short temper and sarcastic sense of humor regardless of his circumstances. So when writing my story, I made it a point to show Harry with a temper and also a biting sense of humor. Harry is indeed a man of action who sometimes runs into things without thinking, so I tried to show that when he entered the tournament essentially out of anger and stubbornness. 

I’ll admit I didn’t really consider whether Harry would be less self-confident or more passive, and clearly I wish I put more thought into it. There are times where I have to admit he is less assured than I probably would imagine him. I think a lot of readers felt like Harry would never let what others think affect his decision not to pursue Ginny. Maybe they just wanted them together sooner. I do believe it made sense for Harry to not pursue Ginny for so long. But I probably could have written it more true to his core character.

Maybe writers need to give ourselves a break if we get the character a bit wrong? Too often, I see writers make mistakes with characterization, but then double down on it when confronted. As someone who believes consistent canonical characterization is paramount in fanfiction, I also see how difficult it can be to get right every time. And I also think it’s more than fair for readers to call us out when we get it wrong. Because they are reading our fics based on a pre-established connection with these characters. It’s our responsibility to get them (mostly) correct. And acknowledge when we fail so that we can get better both in our writing and our understanding of these characters we write about.

I haven't been on my tumblr in a while and missed this question. Obviously it's been answered with my latest chapter, but it did spur some thoughts I wanted to share.

I've taken several months in between chapters, something that isn't rare for fanfiction authors. I imagine most people don't press on these delays because they understand we write for free and also have lives and jobs and such. And many authors, when asked or when they just feel they want to explain themselves, usually cite the fact that life has gotten in the way. Or maybe just some writer's block.

But I want to offer up my own explanation why I've taken so long and probably will continue to do so until the fic is done.

While I am busy at times, I'd be lying if I said that life has made it difficult for me to write regularly. I'd also be lying if I said I am stuck creatively. The truth is that I do have ample time to write, and I know exactly the basic beats of how the rest of my story will go.

No, the biggest reason for my delays is simple lack of motivation. Call it laziness if you want, but I just don't want to write most of the time. I've realized that after a certain point in your story, when the new idea has lost its excitement and those scenes bouncing around in your head are already written, the act of writing itself becomes tedious and a bit boring. It feels less like writing something original and unique and more like checking off some boxes to make sure you are "being a good fanfic writer." I'm making sure the plot is moving along at a good pace, making sure the lines of dialogue are not on the nose and accurately reflect the characters.

Sometimes it feels like coming up with the idea for the story and the outlining are like creating a new app or some other exciting software. It will be revolutionary, change the game. You start having really fun collaborative meetings about the cool features and how the website will look. But then when all the fun stuff is decided, you have to sit down and start writing code or inputting boring data into spreadsheets. You know it's necessary, and in the end you'll have this completed product you can be proud of, but god would you rather do anything else in the moment than tap on computer keys.

I used to think that when an author stopped updating, they had run out of ideas or maybe just got way too busy with life or work. Now I realize its also possible they just don't enjoy it as much at that moment. It's become more work.

This isn't to dissuade people from asking for updates. Ask away! But keep in mind that we probably can't give you a timeline of when it will be updated because there is not some specific thing keeping us from writing more. It's writing itself that is causing the delay.