Good Soupmens

“The romance…further explored”:

To those autistic people, I’ll be talking about this in another post.

To the alltistic people responding that way - please fuck all the way off. If you’re not one of us, you’re not invited to the discussion about how Autistic people should behave.

However, that's moot anyway, because when Autistic people are being shitty, it is NOT because of their autism (we talked about this in the aforementioned previous post). Autism does not make people bigoted. (Neither does any other disability, for the record.)

Second of all, NEVER just tell a stranger “you need to go to therapy” like that. Especially an Autistic person. Here’s why.

First of all, many autistic people can’t access therapy.

In the UK there’s a massive waiting list for therapy because the NHS is underfunded. The situation is similar in Canada and I would imagine in many other countries as well.

In the U.S., many, probably most, Autistic people don’t have health insurance, because 86% of Autistic COLLEGE GRADUATES are unemployed (I can only assume the numbers are similar in other countries) and famously, in America no job 🟰 no health insurance, because, idk, ✨ Freedom ✨ or some bullshit like that.

And even if we do get to therapy, most therapists are not autism-informed and may easily end up traumatizing us further. (This has happened to me.)

We are vulnerable. Many of us are stuck living at home with family forever for the reasons listed above. Which SUCKS, because our families are much more likely to ab*se us than their alltistic kids.

Many of us never find a romantic partner. And even if we do, again, we are much more likely to be ab*sed by our partners than alltistic people are.

It’s also exhausting for us to go out because of sensory overwhelm and the fear that people will take advantage of our diminished ability to judge people’s intentions, and when we do go out, it’s hard for us to make friends because people are so prejudiced against us. We sweat blood trying to exert ourselves to make friends with alltistics, and 99% of the time they refuse to meet us halfway.

In short, the situation ain’t pretty. (And if we’re multiply marginalized, as many of us are, it gets so, so much worse.) For every N*il G*iman, there are thousands of us who are told we should feel lucky to get a job being paid 50c an hour (oh, yeah, that’s right - I forgot to mention, in the U.S. it’s legal to pay us below minimum wage).

***Not to mention the fact that literally every single Autistic person has experienced trauma means that it’s virtually impossible to separate out what’s actually autism and what’s just a trauma response. Look how similarly autism, as defined by the DSM-V, and C-PTSD present. Difficulty regulating emotions. Avoidance of certain situations. Difficulties in sustaining relationships. Stomach issues. Sleep problems. Heightened risk of su*cide.***

That’s a HUGE part of the reason we get so "overly" invested in our special interests. For many of us, they're literally all we have.

The joy that comes through special interests - that's unique to us. It's an autism perk. Idk why. I guess God or somebody thought it was time someone did something nice for us for a change.

But the despair that comes through losing them - that's not the fault of autism, it's the fault of society.

If you were, through no fault at your own, stuck at home with no job, no healthcare, no prospects, few friends, and nothing to look forward to, then you, my alltistic friend, would melt down just as hard as we do if your favorite show got cancelled. It would be the straw that broke the camel's back.

Those Autistic people freaking out over the Great Good Omens Mutilation of 2024 aren’t really "suicidal over a tv show".

The reason we carry around so much despair is because we are slowly being crushed to death by systemic ableism, not because our brains are "too obsessive" or some ableist bullshit like that.

The fandom: HE’S ASHAMED OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP!