one of the best things about uma musume is how all of the horses are kinda weird or dumb in an endearing way. like even the most determined and serious horse will eventually be found somewhere on campus staring at the vending machine looking confused and when you talk to her she'll say "where do these drinks come from? there's no clear sign of entry... could it be divine providence?" or have a training event where she says something like "how do hot dogs survive in the wild with no limbs or eyes? the urge to survive must be strong... i want to get stronger too, like the hot dog." (strength went up!)

I think they should turn more major events in sports history into sexually charged animated movies with amazing cinematography about women wanting to rip eachothers' throats out.

$20 used to mean something