I think about (fucking) you a lot

What if oxygen is poisonous and it just takes 75-100 years to kill us?

My science teacher said he thinks that’s true actually

Yeah this is actually pretty much exactly what is going on. It’s why anti-oxidants are such a big deal. Bonus fact: oxygen oxidizes stuff in your cells or, in other words, it’s not toxic, just setting you on fire very very slowly.

What if there are aliens out there but they subsist on entirely different substances and they’re just scared as shit of us and our crazy ass hell planet? Once in a while some alien anthropologist type suggests checking out the people on this inhabited planet out towards the galaxy’s edge. The other aliens just look at the naive academic with horror. No!! We do not go to that world. That is where the DEATH BREATHERS live. They recreationally consume poisons and are more or less composed of biological fire. Their atmosphere is made of rocket fuel. We must leave the DEATH BREATHERS in peace. Do not go there. Do not.

I tend to always reblog posts about humans being terrifying weirdos to aliens.

@brainsforbabyjesus

OH HOW I LOVE THIS POST. It makes me so much happier about being alive. I AM BURNING VERY SLOWLY. *hugs it*

My favorite thing is when people remember little things I told them. like seriously? you actually listened to me? thank you

i’m a good person i don’t deserve to be mistaken for a heterosexual

I just wanna go to the beach at night just to listen to the waves

a guy at my work said telling your wife/gf that they’re the most beautiful woman in the world to you is just “something you say” and i almost went apeshit. imagine not genuinely believing the woman you’re supposed to love is a work of art. fucking weak. dare i even say pathetic.

he told me this in a very obnoxious wink wink nudge nudge sort of way too like we were sharing an inside joke and got annoyed when i was like “I don’t just say that because i think I’m supposed to mark. i really feel that way about the women i love.” like lol imagine thinking my lesbian ass is gonna co-sign your toxic straight boy bullshit attitude

oh what’s that mark? you lie about how you feel to the women in your life to emotionally manipulate them into staying with you until you feel like moving on? and you think this is normal and not something that’s gonna make me want to beat you with my clipboard? is that what you think you shitty little egg man?

Self care is listening to the same song thirty thousand times in a row

whisper dirty things in my ear in public.