what has two eyes but can't see?

ten years later….

oh HELL yeah! this song, and this cover (at your discretion), definitely has the type of vibe i think valeyne deserves. 

i’m gonna take this somewhere we’ve always like talked about but i’ve never had an excuse to write before. bouta get jazzy and cute with some teen rogues established relationship content. 

In their courtship, Bruce keeps Jerome as far away from any Wayne Enterprises events as possible. He simply has to plan their dates around these events, around these galas and business meetings, and when his face turns up in the Gazette the next day, he just shrugs it off. “I’m the CEO, I have to be there,” he says, brushing off everyone’s questions about just how much his suits cost and how many he owns. 

When Bruce and Jerome actually start dating, though, and then when it sticks, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep Jerome out of his business life. The two of them are seen on dates, they’re seen in public, and he knows it’s only a matter of time until an article crops up theorizing why Bruce doesn’t bring Jerome to public events. That’s something he would love to avoid. 

did you literally climb into my personal valeyne mix and choose this song ?? how did you know my personal preference anon ?? thank you

some subtle future verse jerome!joker canon divergence for you, dear anon

Most days, it comes to blows. 

It’s the closest thing to foreplay that Jerome can get, and god, he loves it. Bruce is young, and strong, and he’s still willing to be a little ruthless as long as Jerome doesn’t bleed. As long as Jerome is still smiling, still laughing, the game goes on.

He loves that.

i’ve literally never heard of this song before, and it totally isn’t my style, but i definitely can go places with it for sure.

Bruce will never admit it, but he knows that he’s a control freak. Most people are more than happy to let him have his way— He watched his parents die, it only makes sense that he’ll act this way. 

There’s something to be said about the fact that people are only willing to indulge him after he lost his parents, after he sat in an alleyway with his mother’s blood on his hands; he tries not to think about it. Instead, he keeps everything he loves under lock and key, under intense security, lest he lose that too. 

It isn’t materialism, it’s self preservation. 

ok (◡‿◡ *)

ooh! hi! thank you!

i’m gonna assume this is just a lil typo and you meant Inside Out by Eve 6 and not some other song i’m too out of touch to know lmao. it’s for the best, cause i love me a good late 90s groove. 

send me a song title & artist + a ship (nygmobblepot, valeyne, thompkean, or fiveleska) and i’ll give you a lil fill!

It’s a cyclical thing between them, and it drives Edward up the wall because it doesn’t make any goddamn sense. Nothing good ever lasts more than a few months, and then suddenly he’s throwing a bottle of expensive chardonnay through the window of Oswald’s office, Oswald is slamming his hands against his desktop, and the security guards know better than to try and stop it prematurely. 

my main squeeze always coming through with the fantastic concepts

ilu !!!! 

Oswald isn’t sure how he got this deeply trapped in his own lies. Lies he’s told his own mother, which somehow makes it ten thousand times worse. She’s convinced herself that when she meets Oswald for lunch today, she’s going to be meeting his mysterious boyfriend, whose name he hasn’t mentioned to her, but he is a lawyer.

Where the fuck does someone like Oswald even find a lawyer to date? His poor mother, bless her heart, she’s just so willing to believe anything he says. Oswald imagines that if his father were around, he would have seen right through his story, but Gertrud— she loves him too much to think him a liar.