Today's Document
Jules of Nature
pixel skylines
Xuebing Du
noise dept.
Three Goblin Art
styofa doing anything
Peter Solarz
tumblr dot com
#extradirty
h
KIROKAZE
blake kathryn
wallacepolsom
Andulka
DEAR READER
i don't do bad sauce passes
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@giraffeonstrike
I need the Hot Latinos to stop being so hot. My wife has picked up on Bad Bunny and now thinks my shorts need to be shorter and I really thought I was right on the line already. I'm too old to do the "hoochie daddy fit" but she persists.
I am fine with all the Pedro Pascal though, and speaking of that...Happy Pride Month!
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I was called into the administration building today and this is how it went:
They asked me, "Eli...why do you have an, um..."Fuck ICE" sticker on your truck?"
Perhaps I should not have laughed, but they sounded so hesitant and used finger quotes. My response was "it is not a sticker, it is a magnet."
They sigh, because above all else it seems like sighing is their job now.
"So it's removeable?"
"Technically, a sticker is removable also."
They dont know I've been waiting to be called in. That I have practiced this. Really all my life I've practiced this brand of not getting outwardly angry. They sigh again.
"So you'll remove it?"
"Is it a condition of my employment at the branch that I remove the magnet from my truck?"
"No..."
"Then no."
They tilt their head, like I do, and that is also funny. To me.
"If it at some point became policy however..."
"Then I would either resign or retire, whichever suited me best at the time."
No one wants this branch. I don't know why...we have a new building, it's larger and better appointed, there's a fucking coffee shop now. But anyone taking over this branch would have to be in this town all day and let's just say, I moved and am willing to drive 28 minutes to work every morning for a reason.
The meeting ends how I know it will...no formal reprimand, nothing on my record, they don't even ask me to sign an acknowledgement form which leads me to believe either I will get to keep my magnet or I will decide to leave should I ever be required to pretend I don't see or care what's going on right under my nose.
Would I rather lose my job than pretend I don't notice our community is fewer now? Do they think I haven't noticed families that I have known for years are gone? I notice everything, and cannot remember the last time I felt an ounce of legitimate intimidation.
I'm sure they miss quiet, complacent Eli. But I don't.
As someone from Minnesota I will tell you...Minneapolis has never been prone to MInnesota Nice Syndrome. ICE fucked up starting there, they just haven't realized it yet. Proud of my home state as always...I've never wanted to go home and help more than I do right now.
"I don't talk to people who don't talk to me because if they don't talk to me HOW DO I KNOW THEY WANNA TALK TO ME?!"
-- my wife, being exactly the same brand of anxious and awkward as I am.
librarians are fun because you'll go and ask for a book no one has read for one william years and they'll be like 'it's not on the system but the neighboring system's neighboring system's neighboring system's uncle's cousin's baby's laboratory professor's favorite crystal provider's alma mater has a copy'
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Death really did not matter to him but life did, and therefore the sensation he felt when they gave their decision was not a feeling of fear but of nostalgia.
Gabriel GarcÃa Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude
So relieved to find out I am indeed, The Way I Am, because...Tylenol. I have wondered why all these years...
Mystery solved. I can move on with my life now.
Also I am very thankful my glasses kept my eyes from rolling out of my skull and onto the floor...
I have received a death threat for refusing to hold a memorial for Charlie Kirk at my branch. In response I've compiled our best books about empathy and put them on a table in the vestibule.
I am still alive.
Spicy reasons aside, the best thing about polyamory for me is that two of us can have a panic attack at the same time and there's always a couple other people around to help.
And that is potentially the most neurodivergent old man thing I've ever said.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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There is a little country church by the house, and you can hear the bells from our yard. They've been ringing them a lot for their vacation Bible school and summer fellowship nights and this evening I had my daughter outside when they started.
My sweet angel daughter, light of my life, precious princess of my life, claps her hands and says "Papa! HELLS BELLS!"
Troubling perhaps to our elderly neighbors, who by the looks on their faces are possibly not the biggest AC/DC fans.
This is her mother's fault for sure.
"you don't owe anyone anything" You are a tar pit. Speak for yourself. I personally owe the cafe employees my dishes put away and my friends a listening ear and small scared insects a cup and a gentle trip outside. Hyperindividualism is a rancid infection borne of capitalism and willfully misinterpreted therapyspeak and I will defy it by continuing to be kind regardless of whether or not it benefits me personally
It is not enough to envision punching people anymore, I want to smite them.
My wife to her doctor, just before going under for a procedure in an intimate area:
"Slice and dice that pussy, bruv"
This is why I married her. Because she inspired a man who went to medical school to come into the waiting room, red faced and giggling, to tell me a thing she said. Because even if she had been completely lucid, she still would have said that exact same thing. She's a powerful, brave, capable woman...but also just plain squirrelly and I love it.
When I'm done crying, I'm gonna tell her that.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I am looking neither respectfully nor disrespectfully. I gaze without recognition of your form, and without understanding.
Me without my glasses
Viral photo from today's meeting of world leaders in Kyiv:
Ukrainian already making memes:
