Unapologetic Mejiro Ardan Simp

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@siveine

everytime this gets notes there's a chance i will see them while outside without sunscreen and go oh yeah. so ty for being part in my cancer prevention

"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

"it's all in your head" oh thank god, it's only just affecting the most important organ in my body that controls almost everything i do to live, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

“nobody is making you do this” i am driven by unnatural forces you will never even begin to comprehend

somnophillia is super funny like im honk shoo honk shoo having a good nights sleep and now you must pass the ultimate test of fucking me without waking me by knocking something over or stepping on a crisp packet i've left on my floor. can you finish your mission while my pet geckos judge you from their tanks? because they're not leaving the room okay the geckos stay in here. also the markiplier fnaf playlist stays on. i sleep better when he's screaming.

all kink stuff is playing pretend but with somno you're not playing pretend you're locked in you're comfy cozy you're snug as a bug in a rug and your partner is playing pretend instead

and like. if you're the one awake you're playing pretend so hard right now like ouuuuhhh look at me i'm a scary evil intruder or a demon or vampire or whatever we're doing tonight and now i just have to uhhhh okay shimmy the duvet off and shhh dontfucking breathe so loud and okayyyyy alright now. ah shit they're sleeping in the family guy death pose how the fuck do i get in there how. how do i. help. why are these geckos looking at me.

plus you have to not get too scared when freddy fazbear jumpscares you or else you're waking them up with your screams

oh great and this guy's here in the cuck box wondering if the screaming is me waking up or markiplier dying or toy bonnie throwing a tantrum

Hero, in recognition for your courage and temerity in the face of my absolute evil, I grant thee a ring of maidenification.

this shits gonna flip into a clean 500 gold pieces for sure

Of course it will, should it leave your finger~

my friend you are off your rocker if you think this thing is even getting close to one of my ring slots I know better than to make that mistake after putting on one of your amulets and being turned into a newt for a week

you were really cute as a newt. . .

nothing scarier than being a fan of a fic and then becoming mutuals with the author. like hi shakespeare. big fan of your fake dating au

the spirit is willing but the flesh is chronically ill