The New & Improved

Have that pathetic crying session. It will save you

"I gave you my whole life and you didn't even want it"

please god stop talking about diets and weight loss in front of kids. especially if those kids are girls. and especially if you’re someone those kids look up to. but really just stop talking about about diets and weight loss when children are in earshot at all. I promise you you’re doing far more harm than good.

when your pet comes to you from another room, the preceding moments meant that they were alone somewhere and thought about YOU, an animal brain literally thought about you and came to you to see what you were doing. that’s love, unconditional.

The more people talk about the Powerball drawing at your work, the more likely you’re all underpaid and overworked