This a birthday gift for the wonderful and talented @houseofeldritch who I appreciate so so so much for being such an amazing moot and friend- Happy Birthday even though it is late and I'm so grateful for having to have met you and being able to call you my friend, you're such a kind and thoughtful person and I hope only one day to be as talented as you 💕💝⭐️✨🎂🎁🎈
Mr Ferns office smelled, it smelled of old bananas and cheap air fresheners which had been sprayed instead of opening a window to freshen up the room creating an even more suffocating atmosphere. The chairs were uncomfortable, the ones that forced you to sit straight, made of heavy mahogany veneer and faux leather, your back starting to ache after sitting for too long. Enzo wanted to sink into it and disappear forever, he sat with his hands folded in his lap but sometimes he would let his hands wander to the leather picking at it watching it flake off into the grey carpet. The walls were white but had cringy posters about self confidence and ‘being yourself’ in between certificates and a college degree in a wooden frame, sun faded from being in the same position for years. There were only two chairs in the room, a potted fern, hence the name ‘Dr Fern’ and a bookshelf which held some psychology books and a small pen pot. Dr Fern sat across from him in his typical green sweater vest, one leg folded over the other, jotting down small notes in the worn leather notebook he keeps on the coffee table next to him, peering at Enzo through thin wire rimmed glasses which kept sliding down to the end of his nose. He was a nice man, Dr Fern, though a little plain with greyish hair that was slicked back.
The corner of Enzo's mouth twitched as he tried to find the words, he knew why he was there, he wasn’t an idiot. Ever since Mari’s death his dad had forced Enzo to see Dr Fern three times a week for one hour, the guilt was what was sent him here, the guilt over not giving his son enough attention after the death of his sister. It was better than the alternative, two grieving people bouncing off each other like atoms in a science experiment or a ball off a basketball court, bouncing and bouncing until something finally gave and the fall out was not going to be pretty at all. Enzo sat at home and Miguel went to work, Enzo pulled away so his dad tried to stop him- like trying to pull the teeth from a wild animal not allowing him to get his vicious violent tendencies in a way that he found helped- nope, the passive route was how this was going to go because it was convenient for his father putting some poor soul between himself and his son to absorb his anger and frustration so he had the calm, nice Enzo- the person he was before Mari's death…such bullshit.
A small, rough “hmph” brought Enzo out of his train of thought, Dr. Fern took his glasses and folded them- putting them into his top breast pocket, thin pale lips pressed into a line as he carefully considered his next words. He tried to look inviting and friendly, angling his body to be open and inviting Enzo knew this was more likely to make him talk, people were more interested in conversation if they felt someone was actually talking to them. Ezo had seen the book labelled “Body language: The talk of the body”. Dr Fern smiled and leaned forward- hands together “what do you think about Enzo?” he asked with the gentleness of someone trying to disarm a live bomb. He was nice enough and seemed to care about Enzo- as long as he was paid, that is, Enzo was sure he forgot about their conversation as soon as the next person walked in and sat in the chair- telling Dr Fern their woes, rinse and repeat. “How my sisters dead” Enzo replied, his tone was snappish and Dr fern instantly leaned back the leather of the chair creaking under his weight as if he was worried Enzo would close the space between them and sink his teeth into Dr Ferns throat, the bomb detonated in the room and obliterated them both- “You fought with Aaron didn’t you?” Dr Fern stated, he knew the answer but it was phrased like a question, a question was more likely to yield a more positive result- if you phrased something as a question the recipient was more likely to answer in an honest way, Dr Ferns shelf was full of useful books.
Enzo looked down at the floor, there was no remorse in his heart for what he did- not like a normal person- he didn’t regret what he did. He remembered the funeral, the church had been packed with teachers and colleagues, some of Mari's friends were there like Lucy and Trinity- some people had tried to hug him all dressed in stiff funeral clothing that had been laid in the back of a closet for most of its existence. Enzo had pulled away from them all, but when Lucy had pulled him into a hug behind closed doors Enzo had gripped her as if she would disappear too, crumble to dust- the casket had been closed, he couldn’t look at his own sister even in a faux peaceful state she had still suffered her precious life cut short. “It should have been me” Lucy had cried to Enzo as they embraced but he had quickly shushed her- she didn’ t deserve anything other than to say goodbye to her friend. A few weeks later Enzo had gone over to Lucy's house and saw she had built a small fairy garden in reverence for Mari, a tiny purple door propped against a tree. Mari’s photo now sat next to his mother on the mantlepiece- she was with her baby now, the infant she never saw grow up would now be forever with her in heaven.
The way Enzo's fist collided with Aaron's face was satisfactory- Aaron's nose had made a sharp CRACK noise and had started to profusely bleed, thick red cascading out of his nostrils when he dared show his face at his sister's funeral, hanging around the pews in the church like death itself, his whole family was a curse- In response to the assault, Aaron had grabbed his hair and given him a black eye making sure to stamp on his glasses in the process- the fight had continued the two boys screaming at each other soft flesh colliding with knuckle and bone until two civilians dragged them away from each other. Aaron had left quickly with his curse of a family, tail tucked between his legs as he fled the scene like his father seemed to flee any sort of responsibility for what he had done since the accident had been put down too faulty tracks and the structure not being welded together and now there was a lot of pressure on Mayor Tavish since apparently he had pushed for the park to be opened by the summer- Everyone in this tupid, god forsaken, cursed town was involved somehow and enzo was filled with spite and hatred for them all.
Enzo still had the glasses that had been smashed during the fight, they sat in an old shoe box along with Mari's old stuffed bunny ‘buggles’ and her hat, along with other pieces of her life, a time capsule that would stay under his bed, gathering dust. Dr Fern was just paid help- some verbal punching bag Enzo could tell all his frustrations to, so when he went home and sat in that empty, cold, house because his dad was too busy with dragging the Peterson name through the mud and stamping on it until its so smeared and unrecognisable no one can say the word without a bitter taste that they wanted to spit out, he didn't put his fist through the wall or try and jump from his bedroom window.
Enzo could sit and sit but it would never take away the emptiness, he tried to fulfill that weird shaped sister hole in his heart with Lucy, oh God, Lucy- her wide terrified doe eyes when she saw the cart crash into a tree, crying as if she had felt death's cold, bony hand brush against the back of her neck sometimes she would subconsciously touch her neck as if making sure her head was still attached to her shoulders. Her and Mari had always been close, as if they were sisters born from the same womb so tightly intertwined you couldn’t tell one from the other- they had been in the same inventors club together, the one Mr Peterson ran. They had grown up together and now Lucy would continue to grow without her sister…without her friend. Enzo felt it, the deep-seated protectiveness that only a brother felt, he wanted to protect Lucy- she had suffered far too much for one lifetime and he would try and absorb as much of it as possible, the same with Trinity- he couldn’t save Mari but he could save them. “Enzo” Dr Fern interrupted Enzo's mind wandering further down the dark path it was on, looking at his silver watch, a wedding gift from his wife- the leather strap worn and faded “I’m sorry but our time is up today” he apologised flicking his wrist once- he seemed genuinely upset or perhaps he was upset he hadn’t been able to dig his fingers into Enzo's brain, open it up and rotate it over until he had picked it dry, Enzo had thoughts and feeling he didn’t want to share and probably never would like how he would rather be with his sister than in this town for another minute but that was for another time. Enzo stood, nodding slowly, walking towards the door but Dr Fern was faster, opening it for him and smiling at him on the way out “please talk to Sharon at the front desk for your next appointment, have a good day” he said, closing the door gently behind him with a soft click.
After organising his next appointment with Dr Fern, Enzo stepped out into the warm summer air outside, he fished the cigarette packet from his pocket picking one out with his mouth and and lit it, holding it to his lips and taking a long drag- he gave a sigh and started to walk home slowly, no rush, his dad wouldn’t be home for a few hours so he had all the time in the day to meander back home- there was some beauty in Raven Brooks, like how the sun made the town glow red in the slightest way. He finished his cigarette around Mrs Tillman's shop and threw the bud in the trash and continued his trek home- he decided to walk to the old estate to kill some time, the more time out of the house the better- he didn't dare go near the square, you couldn’t stand the place, it was an awful, dark place that held too many painful memories of him and Mari going to Gamers Grotto together, well, him going into gamers grotto and Mari following him around like how a little sister would. He still wanted to be out of the house so the old housing estate was. Enzo passed all the characters of Raven Brooks as he kicked rocks from the sidewalk and avoided the ways of passing pedestrians, he passed a mother with a twin pram of screaming toddlers- she gave Enzo a sympathetic look as she walked past.
Most people looked at Enzo with sympathy in their eyes, he had become accustomed to it so he simply blocked it out or ignored it- he didn’t want people's sympathy he wanted someone to be responsible, he wanted Mr Peterson behind bars- he hated them all. Enzo came to a stop in the old estate- it was quiet and he appreciated that away from all the loudness of the rest of Raven Brooks where people seemed to speculate his sister's death like it was that morning's fresh news story which it had been for the last few weeks. Enzo came to a slow stop, he had time for another cigarette but he couldn’t, he couldn’t keep paying Seth's brother to get them for him since he was running out of pocket money and his dad would start getting suspicious and he would have to explain what was going on which was a conversation he wasn’t ready to have.
Enzo came to a stop outside the Peterson's house, he resisted the urge to lob a rock through the front window- hopefully it would smash Mr Peterson in the head but he could only wish, he noticed a new car in the house across from the Petersons lair- a family car. Enzo looked up at the window where the curtains softly fluttered in the evening wind and in the evening glow Enzo could make out a vague boy-shaped figure in the window.
