moonrat

I'm like 99% anti outdoor cat but there's this precious stoop cat on my way to the grocery store that never leaves his stoop, always comes up to say hi if you approach him, and when you leave he lays back down on his stoop

i need to age regress to 18 and do a bachelors degree correctly this time and get a million dollar job the moment i graduate and make 2000 friends who all love and worship me and find the artifact and defeat the evil mastermind and slay the ape

ma'am, I'm going to place you on a brief hold while I look for a reaction image

absolutely hate it when the pleasurable activity procrastination hits. i’m going to do something fun that brings me joy but not yet. yeah, not yet. not yet. maybe i shouldn’t do it at all, it’s not that fun

Snooki was a gyaru, but like. The Italian American version.

Stephen King character internal monologues: All that running and running and no one can get you in the end, Jackie-boy, can they? Except those goddamn coyotes will chase you up a tree and goawaygoawaygoaway tear your legs off. And the lady with the big tits won’t be able to save you because the coyotes got you and your leg is already spurting all that blood. Ayuh.