hi internet therapist. my cat fucking died 3 weeks ago. i am the most miserable i’ve been in at least 5 years. i am getting so close to snapping. i should feel happy because the weather is perfect and shit is growing everywhere but instead it’s just pissing me off. i am seeing weird shadows and flashes in my eyes and my skin burns most of the day. i’m frustrated that so many good things are around me but i am too sad, anxious, tired to appreciate them. i am thankful i have tom, but my misery is making me an awful partner. and i know he feels miserable too. really trying to get some therapy and get on some meds but i’m waiting for my insurance to “approve” it since i don’t want to spend $500 out of pocket right before i quit this stupid fucking joke of a job.
i guess i’ll try to make a list of good things to help me feel better:
- tom is here (he’ll be home soon)
- bobo’s spirit is here
- my mom is happy and with a nice person, and she just bought a house. she lives in FL so i can go there now to visit her
- my sister seems pretty happy, going on vacation and taking selfies. she also bought a house that she is renovating
- my grandma is 92 and doing really well, and i get to see her in a couple weeks.
- dame is a part of my life, giving me fulfillment, love, and fun times each week at practice. and we’ve been writing some really good songs
- even though my job is terrible, at least i can talk to my coworkers about it and we can all commiserate together
- wednesday is over
- there are many bunnies and interesting birds near my house
- i am going to a 10 year “hs reunion” in brooklyn that only my friends are invited to. despite being literally 40 pounds fatter than in high school, i’m really looking forward to it
- i’ve been reading more lately, and playing a lot of skyrim. tom is urging me to play dark souls so i might do that soon also
andulkaphoto
dailybridgerton
theartofmadeline
stormborns
pixelskylines
germansingergirl
