emi

im back just to say that i feel invisible. everyone keeps canceling plans on me. people dont talk to me. no one ever messages first i always do it first. i feel like such shit. what makes me happiest is being at home with my family and being with my bf and rn that’s kinda it. besides also being in bed. i’m constantly so scared that because things are good, everythings going to tumble down and hurt me. i have a feeling it just will. a close friend got broken up with today and i just keep hearing her sobbing thru our shared wall. it just makes me worried. i wish that i could be reassured but whenever i feel the need to be, it’s a time where he needs to be alone. im just being so inconvenient.

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i need someone to hit me in the head.