"lock in" is probably one of the most important phrases to enter the public lexicon in the 2020s

Text: congrats on the failure babe, most people don't even try

im swimming at the lake and accidentally kicked a fish. this has never happened in my many years of swimming. sorry man

I love saying “no worries” instead of “it’s okay,” like do not spend a single millisecond of your finite mortal existence letting anxiety over this situation consume you. I have already erased the incident from the timeline. It is gone. You are safe now.

having a best friend who meets your level of freak is unmatched. you present them with the most unhinged, deeply buried thought from the depths of your psyche and instead of blinking blankly they just go "oh absolutely"—and I think that mutual brain rot like that is the highest form of intimacy actually.