underrated funny element of Lord of the Rings is that the prophecy about how “no man” shall kill the Witch-King, foreseen and spoken by a mighty elf-lord of old…is from Glorfindel. You know, our buddy Glorfindel, from Rivendell? Who picked the hobbits & Aragorn up for the last few miles to the valley, pursued by the Ringwraiths? Which he did because he is, yes, a mighty-elf-lord of old—but his primary and in fact only role in the story is as basically a high-stakes emergency uber guy. Also, when I say “mighty elf-lord of old”, I DO mean he’s a hero of the First Age, a lord of Gondolin ere its fall, famed for slaying a Balrog to safeguard the retreat from that grand city, now reborn & returned to Middle Earth to help fight evil…and he gave that prophecy about the Witch-King in like the mid-Third Age just ~2,000 years ago, like 5,000 years AFTER his epic Balrog duel. For the Men, this is a Huge Thing of Yore; for Glorfindel, it was, like, not just another Tuesday, but maybe a serious Saturday; and also he’s still here, just ubering lost hobbits.

AU where Boromir survives but literally nothing changes because they all think he’s dead and he’s still recovering and by the time he’s actually okay again everything important is already over. Like lowkey imagine how fucking funny it would be if during the one scene where Frodo wakes up after destroying the ring and everyone is coming in, Boromir just walks in nervously and Frodo, who is trying to distract from the fact that he very clearly does not know Legolas’ name, pretends to pass out. Everyone is just like “oh dear!”, Sam goes into overprotective mode (“I told you it was a bad idea Mr. Gandalf!”) Aragorn is trying to reassure Boromir that it’s not his fault and that everything will be fine, Merry and Pippin are trying to comfort each other, Gimli and Legolas are just standing awkwardly in the corner because they know nothing about hobbit biology and what normal reactions are for this sort of thing. Gandalf is the only one who knows Frodo is faking it but he says nothing because Gandalf loves drama and being a bitch. Eventually they’re all ushered out to give Frodo more rest, except for Gandalf, who insists on staying to watch over him. After everyone is gone Gandalf tells him he can open eyes, and the first question out of Frodo’s mouth is very much not about Boromir’s miraculous return, or the state of the world, or about what happens to him now, but rather “Gandalf, what the fuck is the elf’s name?”

Aragorn n Legolas r so funny to me bc people who don’t know lotr well see gruff manly ranger and elegant princely elf but they don’t know what i know. they don’t know that Aragorn is the long haired sensitive softboy writing sad poetry on his livejournal about not being able to show his girlfriend the awesome new song he wrote for her on his guitar meanwhile Legolas is doing backwards kickflips over gimli at the skate park bc gimli double dog dared him then he and gimli climb the tree at Aragorn’s house n yell at him through the window to come play halo

the gimmick blogs are like tumblr’s rogue gallery. yes we’ve got some heroes, yes we’ve got some villains, but more importantly if you look over here you will see some freak who devotes all their time to counting the number of “t’s” in a post

YOU EXIST???

Sometimes you create a guy and it turns out they already exist

1993-1997 Mazda 626