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mood lighting

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mitchipedia

7777777awawawa7777777

sorry everyone we won’t be seeing any men today they’ve all been bricked into their enclosure

m1dori-eyes

The Masc of Amontillado

popsunner

Guess what? I invented a new word: Plagiarism

Wh

popsunner

I’m reblogging this because I just fucking got the joke

theehorsepusssy

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dickspooky

I’m getting strong enough to kill you all

C o s y

On April 4, 1841, William Henry Harrison, our 9th POTUS, became shortest serving President in US history by dying in office from pneumonia wildly believed to be have been caused by his decision to give a two hour inaugural address in the pouring rain without a coat or hat. Just a fun fact unrelated to this tweet.

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hmmm

Outdoor in sun perfec t place for president to do speech! Outdoor very warm very soft put old man on green lawn under sun. Put old man in warm sun. no problem ever in warm sun because good view and audience can see long speech. Nice podium outdoor sunny perfect place for old president can trust warm sun to give nice view to President good luck to President. friend sun.

borealing

Men like to believe theyd be great in apocalypse scenarios but they dont even know how to sew

madgastronomer

Some male friends of mine were once talking about how useful they’d be in an apocalypse, and I pointed out that as a weaver and sewer and maker of stuff, I’d be pretty damn useful and they tried to tell me they could just loot clothes from WalMart and they’d be fine. As if WalMart has endless supplies without weekly deliveries.

alls-well-that-ends-weird

So just last night a friend of mine was talking about who he’d round up in the event of a zombie apocalypse and how I’m his go-to farmer on account of I know how to keep an entire homestead up and running and we’re talking about what kind of resources I’d need to keep a colony of about 50-ish people alive and i bring up what all goes into processing wool for clothing and such and he just kind of stops me like ‘wait, wait, we don’t need to do all of that because we can scavenge for clothes we don’t need to be able to make them’ and i’m just like, ‘dude, that works in the short-term maybe but if this community is going to be sustainable you’ve gotta have people whose job it is to make clothes and blankets and shit’

also cloth rots pretty quickly when left exposed to the elements and after the first few years or so anything we manage to scavenge isn’t going to be wearable anymore and anywho we’ve got to teach the kids everything or they’re not gonna know what to do some decades down the line when everything’s too rusted or rotted out to be of any practical use anymore, etc etc, and he’s reckoning that things like woodworking and smithing and ranching are more important than say, cleaning or cooking or dairying and meanwhile i’m just smh may all the gods have mercy on this poor fool

He also balked when i brought up how to run a laundry and what all was needed to make everyday shit like soap and toothpaste - like dude, you think this is going to be all about hunting and scavenging and being neato manly-man drifters like in the walking dead let me teach you a thing about keeping a village alive and healthy for more than a week man most of it is shit you keep thinking is non-essential on account of it being “women’s work” or “simple chores” that’re actually pretty labor-intensive and take time, training, knowledge, and practice to do successfully, let alone well, and are 100% absolutely necessary work in order for you to have any reasonably good quality of life after the world ends

mungeondaster

Dudes think the apocalypse only lasts for six seasons and a movie

tropiyas

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apollosunn-moved-deactivated202

anyone else relate

midnightclover

gayballs-mcgee

it’s very hot out

gayballs-mcgee

#me #it is too hot to be watering plants and seasoning the grill

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