I just got the best dang chicken tenders

90% of google search ai summaries feel like this guy leaning uncomfortably over your shoulder and pointing at stuff on your screen reading out the exact same text you're already looking at

my toxic trait is carelessly getting dressed in front of open windows because if someone wants to look in, that’s their problem

Lowkey I bet it felt good as fuuuuuuck to be one of the coal miners that got to blow a pinkertons brains out from a high ridge with a bolt action rifle.

midwife? don't say that. a wife could never be that.

being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. but then there are also the horrors

with faith and perseverance, one day we will sauté the horrors

having someone watch u play video games is an underrated form of companionship

Bitches wanna buy their boyfriends the latest consoles but when was the last time he CONSOLED you? ps 5 years ago

they got married btw