Arpit Garg's Weblog

Disclaimer: I don’t eat non-veg. But I don’t keep an opinion on those who eat.

Innocent!

I was watching episodes of Master Chef Australia/America where animals, all chopped up and being referred to as protein, were being used to display culinary skills. From lamb to chicken to goat to cow to duck to rabbit, all alike. 

Then I read about Western revolution to ban Yulin dog eating festival in China. Something  didn't seem to add up. How eating one animal is divine while eating other one is devilish.

Well, the only reason I came up with is, it’s an insane world we live in. Top 10 countries according to meat consumption in lbs/person/year are listed as below (2005)

S No.

Country

lbs/person/year

1

Luxembourg

315

2

Hong Kong

296

3

United States

279

4

Australia

259

5

Austria

240

6

Spain

238

7

Cyprus

230

8

New Zealand

229

9

Denmark

222

10

Ireland

222

Am I not innocent?

Surprisingly these are among the countries that are most vocal against the Yulin festival. It’s not that these are the only countries. A lot of Chinese people are also against this custom.

Am I not innocent?

My only argument is, be a Gandhi before you preach. Absolve yourself of sins before calling the other person a murderer. I really don’t understand the hypocrisy. I don’t understand the difference. 

I agree that people who steal other people’s pets should be prosecuted. But more than that is just one-upmanship. It’s like You are more cruel than I am, You are bigger thug than me.

 Up to some point I can understand vegetarians protesting against meat eaters. Though I again leave it to personal choice. But one flesh eater pointing finger at other flesh eater is beyond my understanding.

I used to admire Ola a lot. A start-up that solved the commuting headache of evolving India. I have used Ola in metro cities Mumbai, Delhi and have admired their service. Nice ride, with informed drivers. Ola service centre provided good guidelines to the drivers which I think helped them to service customers.

However what I faced recently in Agra, was a very bad experience. I called a cab. A very old and bad looking cab came to pick me up. "How does looks matter. I just need a ride", thinking this, I got in the cab. Now the cab started shaking as the ride started. At the very first turn, driver hit a two wheeler which fell down and needed helping to picked up. I realized it was not the drivers fault, the brake was at fault. The car was so old, it was not in a position to run smoothly. Gates opened only on one side, AC was not cooling the cab.

Then came the next part, Driver asked me money for Diesel. I told him, I have recharged my Ola money and couldn't pay cash. Poor driver didn't understood what I was talking about. Apparently, cab belonged to some local heavyweight, who run 4-5 cabs with Ola and have hired drivers to drive his cars. This driver didn't know anything about how Ola cab worked. In fact I have to remind him to click "Start Journey" on his device after 500m or so. And he was like, "Sir kuch upar se de dena 500m ke, boss gaali dega warna".

Coming back to the diesel. He stopped the car and called his boss. He told that passenger won't pay cash and diesel is running out. "Aapne subah bas 3 litre dalwaya tha sir, aur paise bhi nahin diye aapne". I heard him telling his boss.

Anyway, a shaky ride with me praying at every turn ensued. As I was still to reach the destination, driver stopped again. "Aap yahin pe utar jao. Main aage nahin jaoonga. Boss yahin pe aake petrol bharwa dega. Mujhe dhakka nahin lagana". I told him that I won't argue with him. I will complain to Ola. "Aap jo bhi karo, kar lo. Meri gaadi nahin hai. Mujhe kya. Waise bhi yeh gaadiyaan Nisaar sahab ki hain. Unka kuch nahin kar sakte Ola waale. Saalon ko Agra mein Ola chalaani hai toh Nisaar sahab se panga Ola waalon ka baap bhi nahin le sakta. Agra mein Ola band karwa denge sahab".

I got down. Waited for a rickshaw for a while; Took the rickshaw and got to my destination.

I enquired further as to the root cause. The issue is lack of checks by Ola. People are buying old, debilitated cars for 50,000 bucks. They get 36,000 per month from Ola. Keep a driver @ 6000. Diesel for another 8000 bucks. Clear 22000/- profit per month. Since the cab is old, no burden of EMI's. I came to know such practice is rampant in Tier-2/3 cities like Agra, where they say, "Bas call aata haiOla se, koi check karne to aata nahin hai, ki kitni ghatiya car hai".

I say Ola has gone Nestle way because, Swiss company Nestle think of Indians as Poor people and apply different quality checks for Indian and Switzerland/US/UK. Same is being done by Ola. They are applying different standards and responses to Metros Delhi/Mumbai/Bengaluru and to Tier-2/3 cities. In a bid to expand, quality is being degraded.

Disclaimer: This post is an art of fiction, laced with humour and should be read accordingly.

Time is a great leveller. The Lalit-Sushma saga that has been unfolding has brought a lot of people riding on morally high horse, thrashing to the ground. Like all of you, I have been following the story, given a lot of free time I have! A lot of people has given a lot of statements over last few days. 

Obviously they were camouflaging the real statements. Let's try and find out what they really meant. 

1. Sushma Swaraj: 

What she said?

I took a humanitarian view. What benefit did I pass on to Lalit Modi - that he could sign consent papers for surgery of his wife suffering from Cancer ?

What she really meant?

Phas Gayi ri Sushma. Thought Lalit Modi was some relative of Narendra Modi. Ek Modi ne Minister banaya. Doosra le dooba. A lot of people are dying in India. Lot's of slum dwellers right here in Delhi. I am happy that their slums are demolished. No humanitarian consideration for them. But Modi is the new Gandhi. All should know. 

2. Rahul Gandhi:

What he said:

Who is Lalit Modi? He is man of black money. Now Narendra Modi ji is saving another Modi. BJP can say all they want to, but the truth is that PM is saving a man with black money.

What he really meant:

Everyone who cut my holiday short, have to bear the brunt now. And I really don't know Why is Lalit Modi? Please help me out here. I don't even know what black money is, I only know black coffee. They handed me a script and I just read it. Waiting for next foreign holiday...

3. Rajnath Singh:

What he said:

We want to make it clear that whatever she has done is right. We justify it and the government completely stands by her.

What he really meant:

Bhad me Jao Sab ke Sab. Mere beta toj jaise taise bach gaya. Abki baar, Sushma ki Haar. I am least interested in all this. My post has anyways be made ceremonial by Modiji. Do whatever you want to do. I am too old for all this now.

4. Digvijay Singh:

What he said:

I want to ask the Prime Minister, I want to ask finance minister, why are they keeping quiet? Is he a fugitive? We want to know?

What he really meant:

I want go ask God, "Why Rahul Gandhi...Why...What mistake have I done"? I want to ask Sonia Gandhi, why she brought Rahul to the world? Is he really human? We want to know? Uh...My Son got married...now time for me to get married. Yay!

5. P. Chidambaram:

What he said:

The complete answer to Mr Lalit Modi's accusations against UPA can be found in the letters to the UK Chancellor. Release them.

What he really meant:

I retired knowing that I won't be re-elected. I walk fast and look busy, it keeps from knowing how dumb I am. I got a zero in Economics 101 in exam. What else could I give the country. I myself lost crores in share market. And they wonder why economy was ruined!. Ha...ha.

6: Lalu Yadav:

What he said:

Sushma Swaraj is a woman. She should not be pestered over the issue. Political parties should not pester her more.

What he really meant: 

Ei toh saala hona hi tha. Ab chara kha ke gobar hi niklega, sona toh nahin niklega. She is a woman, don't pester her. I am a senior citizen. Don't pester me too. Waise bhi bahut preshan hoon, budbak!

7: Ram Gopal Yadav:

What he said:

Political parties often help people on humanitarian grounds. Sushma Swaraj has a long outstanding political career. Why will she take a favour from Lalit Modi?. It was totally on humanitarian grounds.

What he really meant: 

My minister got a reporter burnt alive. Central Govt. hasn't yet asked for details. You should know why. Tu meri kuhja, mein teri khujaoon! We also need the help on same humanitarian grounds to sustain the Jungle Raaj!

8. Sharad Pawar:

What he said:

I bumped into Lalit Modi while having lunch at a London restaurant three-four weeks ago. I told him he should come back to India and face the law. 

What he really meant: 

What a bump that was. Like a bump caught! Junta is fool. They have believed my nonsense all this time. They will believe this too. I bumped into Lalit Modi in the big London city while having Lunch by chance. They will also believe that I advised him to face the law. They will also believe I am the Queen of England

9. Arun Jaitley:

What he said:

Swaraj’s decisions were bonafide and she acted in good faith. The entire government and party are one on the matter. The minister is capable of taking decisions on her own. When she needs to seek government approval she will do that.

What he really meant:

Foreign relations have improved faster than the economy. She was edging past me in performance. Good riddance! Goverment and party is together on the conclusion that She has taken her the decision all alone. So please humko baksho.

10. Kirti Azad:

What he said:

#BJPs #AsteenKaSaanp & #Arnab conspire against BJP leaders. Guess the snake? IStandWithSushmaSwaraj @SushmaSwaraj

What he really meant: 

The row between Delhi Government and Central Government has been going on since the Delhi Government took charge. Most of it stems from the different interpretations of Constitution from Kejriwal and Modi.

Currently ACB (Anti Corruption Bureau) seems to be the bone of contention with both Kejriwal and Modi want to get a hold over it for whatever interests. Kejriwal says it is being done by Modi to shield the corrupt. While Modi's side says they have constitutional authority on ACB. 

With the arrest of Delhi Law Minister, this has risen to absurd level. Fake degree cases have been lodged against Mrs. Smriti Irani and Mr. Ramshanker Katheria, well known BJP names. Selective and targeted arrest of Law Minister raises a lot of eyebrows. The same BJP which accused Congress of vested interest by staying silent on Modi visa row and not honouring elected CM, is going the Congress way. 

My sympathies are all will AAP on this. Let the Delhi Goverment function. We are all aware of rampant corruption in BJP own MCDi in Delhi. I agree 1 year is too short for Modi to clean all of it. No fault to him. But if someone is trying to sweep of corruption, Modi should take this as a support to his cause. Modi's priority lies to BJP or the country? The lines seems blurred.

I think it's time for Hon'ble Supreme Court to take suo moto and solve this Constitutional crises. Court can once and for all give proper guidelines and a better interpretation of Constitution.

The CNG witness scam is the current issue. Kejriwal wants to get it probed. Some vested interest clearly don't. At least that's what I make of it as an informed citizen. I am pained to see BJP going the Congress way. I was equally pained when Akhilesh Yadav squandered the promise. I was equally pained when Rahul Gandhi after nuclear deal high, felt silent when country was looted.  

There doesn’t seem to be an end to BJP going the BJP way. What I mean is getting hit wicket. When all seems to be working fine, Modi is gaining applauds for his work. Governance has been restored. 

Why is BJP hell bent on running itself out. Advaniji once famously said, “BJP can only be hit wicket. No one can bowl us out”. This was pre-2004 when BJP was shining.

Even after burning its fingers, Why is BJP repeating the same in Delhi. Such confrontation with an elected Delhi Government, people are not taking too well. Just like the back-channelled approaches to form Govt. earlier, BJP is trying to do the same. Advaniji graciously backed Shiela Dixit Govt. in transfer posting of officers, as the will of elected CM needs to be respected. But Modi/Amit Shah seems not to be in mood.

The plan is to get AAP Govt. to fail by whatever means. I have said earlier also, Congress used to hide behind logics like “Constitutional Authority”, “Let’s talk civil” and look what happened to it. Votes of today don’t care how/what politicians utter (only Media seems to care about it). We care about work. Deeds more than words. 

Modi’s advisors have wrongly advised him on Delhi issue. Since I have been a Modi fan, this feels more painful. I urge PM to stop it. I can agree if this was done for stopping corruption or benefit of Delhi. But priorities seem to lie anywhere else. Why worry about strengthened ACB? Why worry about CNG Fitness scam? Looks like BJP has compromised with corruption at some level. 

Okay, so Maggi is in the eye of the storm these days. My Maggi. Let me first do some prediction. Maggi will keep on being sold. Nothing will happen to it. The tide will stem, just like it happened with Cola’s. People will be paid and sweetened, and tests will pass.

The issue I want to discuss is News Channels questioning celebrities’ culpability in all this. The celebrities who endorsed the product. I agree, they should be to some extent, as they aided in fooling people to buy the product. But what these news channels conveniently forget is they too aired the same advt. And hence are equally culpable in fooling us.

If celebrities are made a party, then all the TV channels, news papers, each and every one involved in promotion and marketing should be made a party. Limit of absurdness, right? Well so is making celebrities a party. If they are endorsing an illegal product, I can understand the blame. But when Govt. agencies themselves certified it earlier, how does anyone, including celebrities, News Channels know? We all were fooled not by Maggi, but by our own system.

Why haven’t we created a system yet, which catches such crimes sooner. Everyone who earlier signed off on the clearances to Maggie should be the first one to be taken to task. Nestle is a Swiss company, What better to be expected of them than to leach on gullible foreigners?

Not sure what exactly has gone wrong, but a lot has evidently. It’s not that I am a gullible person but all too sudden double speak by Modi Govt has taken me aback. How the mighty have fallen and continuously do so.

Consider this, Arun Jaitely recently said that indirectly elected Upper House can’t hold the passage of bills and is a threat to democracy. This statement is against the very core of constitution. Upper house represents the states, which under the federal structure is a must. Centre was not envisioned to be all too powerful and states were given rights to decide for themselves. In Centre the Upper House plays this role.

Being the leader of the party in the Upper House, this smacked of all too hypocrisy. Anyways, one could have discounted this as his genuine personal view. But what his party is doing with Delhi Govt. via Lt. Governor is the same. According to BJP, Opposition is not letting elected Govt work. And BJP is not letting elected Delhi Govt work. Shame to Shame.

OK, Lets take the much talked about topic of Net Neutrality head on. We have heard enough allegations, counter allegations and then some. Even for Computer geeks the concept of Net Neutrality is quite new, leave aside the mere surfers. Let me try and break it to bare bones.

Net Neutrality means bandwidth and airwaves are not partial to what data is flowing through. Also equal opportunity, which has led to a lot of innovation. There are two so called attacks on net neutrality. One is Airtel Zero or internet.org (facebook). Other is charging premium for whatsapp data usage.

My viewpoint on whatsapp premium is as follows. Telecom companies plead that they have paid heavily for Airwaves. They are also bound by rules and regulations. The new apps like whatsapp which have taken everyone by surprise provide services similar to sms/calls but are not bound by the same rules. What Telecom companies are asking for is a Telecom-Neutrality. For investment in telecom infrastructure, what we need is a healthy balance sheet of telecom companies. My view is since telecom companies have paid through their noses for airwaves in 2G/3G auctions, they have right to earn handsome. TV channels including news channels, ups the ad rates during IPL finals or such major events; Also tie the ad rates with TRP’s. Why are then telecom companies being targeted alone?

Well for one it’s easy to target someone who charges people money every min of the day for just uttering a word. I feel rather than targeting telecom companies, what we should fight for is level playing field. Rules and Regulations should be same for everyone providing same services. Whatsapp is no saint. They have already made 20 billion dollars. Who paid for it? You would say Facebook. I say no. I say Whatsapp has earned at the expense of the same telecom companies. We should ask Whatsapp a piece of that 20billion USD made out of next to zero investment, rather than berating telecom companies who have invested a lot.

Next is the issue of telecom companies partnering with selected websites and making them available for free. Well on the face of it I was enraged too. How can this be done? It means propagating few websites. Since people tend to choose surfing for free, it would also mean limiting the meaning of internet for the people.

Then I looked at the stats of internet penetration in India. It’s just 20% of population. Few people out of these 20% people are the one raising hue and cry. What about the rest 80% who don’t have access to internet. Don’t they have a right to internet? If they get internet for free in whatever shape, isn’t it better? No, say the high and mighty. Shallow moral arguments are put forward. Who cares for the betterment of 80%, when a small portion of the 20% who are on twitter/facebook rule the roost. I admit someone is going to too make money out of this zero/org initiatives but as long as 80% people get to access internet for free, I will be the first one to support it.

O Princess, O Sweetheart,My apple pie, my lemon tart,Google you, I’m feeling lucky,You are my Lovey Dovey.

Your hairfall, Your confusion,Is no temporary but all season,You are tea leaf, I am plucky,You are my Lovey Dovey.

Your shyness, Your red cheeks,All flat, What Macho, What Geeks,Movie You, I Vicco Vajradanti,You are my Lovey Dovey.

You wake up, its my sunshine,When off you doze, its my night,I’m like a cold, You Vicks Vaporab,You are my Lovey Dovey.

So slim are you, still worry weight,Let me have last bite off the plate,I stain yellow, You White of Tide,You are my Lovey Dovey.

Your anger makes me laugh,Never full, all half and half,I melody, you are chocolaty,You are my Lovey Dovey.

Arguments, counter arguments and then some. This has been going on over the BBC documentary India’s Daughter. It has boiled down to the clash of two leading media houses. Both wanting to outdo each other in TRP race.

The media house who was to air the said documentary has begun rally in support. Rival news channel, has gone to town all bonkers against it. The sad part is, this war is not ideological. These channels could have easily switched places, and would have justified themselves too.

This is TRP race my friend. Documentary will get more eyeballs now, in this internet age. All those who didn’t knew about the details of interview, will know now for sure. So all the campaign against it will backfire. But who cares. As I said, it’s not ideological.

The flouting of norms and ethics has become a passe. What else could be expected of Radia-taped journalists. Why add to the horror of the victim’s family by airing the face and views of a monster. Who cares. As I said, it’s not ideological.

As long as the TRP’s are coming, it’s all good. Someone has the pressure to reach No. 1, other is under pressure to remain No. 1.

I am travelling to Mumbai in train. Got stuck in traffic and was able to catch the train just in time, that too owing to the magnanimity of Indian Railways; train got late.

Anyways, I somehow caught the train huffing and puffing and soon was fast asleep. TT came, I woke up and got my ticket checked. Went back to sleep. Sometime later, he came back; asked for 10/- pending amount. I thought, what the hell!

I asked him to explain me what he meant by pending amount. Matlab bhada hua kiraya, he explained. I was perplexed. As an avid news follower, I didn’t read about any fare increase. Poor chap himself didn’t knew much. I asked him for a reciept. He told that he is collecting now and will create receipt for everyone in the coach together and will give it. I thought for a second and then gave him 10/- pending amount. I want to sleep some more, hence it wouldn’t matter if he gavereciept or not.

I also don’t know what this increased fare is all about. I only remember the smugness on face of Finance Minister, Mr. Jaitley when he said, Middle class should take care of themselves. So I took care of myself. Going by such clandestine increase in fares, and no acche din on the anvil, dont worry Mr. FM, come elections, middle class will take care of you and your party too.

When sun shines, I miss that smile,Drop of rains, I miss those tears,Wind blows, the breath you blew,My heart beats, I miss you.

Come Diwali, I miss that burst,Friends around noone to trust,When night falls, I miss the blue,My heart beats, I miss you.

Sometimes when I feel so dull,I miss your efforts to cheer me up,That cute face, that eyes pursue,My heart beats, I miss you.

Day last when I was angry,I dearly missed that soothing touch,Calm me down, all anxieties flew,My heart beats, I miss you.

Wins in life, no worth to me,When none around to share with,Fun is lot but happiness through,My heart beats, I miss you.

Same food I eat, same air I breath,But find myself on alien terrain,So far away from land I grew,My heart beats, I miss you.

Controversy surrounded the documentary India’s daughter has brought all phonies back to action. With their opinions and commentary on various media platforms.

I read a piece by a self proclaimed eminent person, who was in news about controversial death of his wife till very recently. According to him, the ban embarrasses India. Cool! So a ban on a documentary by BBC embarrasses whole of India. No Sir, it’s you who feel embarrassed. You who feel economy class flight traveler are cattle. We can just imagine what you would think of Train travelers; Bus travelers. God forbid you meet a person who don’t have any money to travel, you would I am sure choke to breath the same air. You feel embarrassed as you would be asked questions by your friends across the world and probably in BBC.

Your phoniness knows know bound. Stop crying for British Broadcasting Corporation, come down to earth and do your bit for your mother India. But no, you would enjoy and feel embarrassed in the company of global elites, while we who are worse than cattle, are subjected to this torture of your blogs.

A lot of such his/her highness are raising voices across. Like all other issues in India are already resolved. Please work to make India a better nation, not to grab airwaves. I am deeply saddened by affairs of media. How have they fallen! The race for TRP has corrupted them beyond repair. I can understand actions by a foreign media channel, foreign reporter, who did things to make money at the expense of India. But why our own media wants to do the same to our own nation is beyond understanding.

Forced to get up 6 in the morning, I lethargicly got ready. A customary post marriage trip to a temple around 2hrs drive away. Shri Dauji Maharaj Temple near Agra. Lord Dauji, the brother that Lord Krishna grew up with. Dauji is commonly known as Balram.

Early morning coupled with Holi hangover made sure there was no traffic. A smooth toll road and a futher bumpy ride later, we reached the destination. Corruption aside, I feel toll roads have done much good than harm to society. Anyways it’s a discussion for another time.

My mother went nostalgic about Tonga rides she had taken along the same lanes long time back. As we reached near the temple, we saw a lot of barricades and policebandobast. Apparently, today was day after holi and in this temple, holi is played today with God. Holi hudanga, with flowers, colours replete.

Some people say I am angry,Some say I am stupid much,Few find me too arrogant,Special few uncondition love.

Some people say I don’t listen,Some say I disrespect a lot,Few find my hardness in heart,Special few uncondition love.

Some people say I am filthy,Some say I am self obsessed,Few find devil inside too dark,Special few uncondition love.

Some people say I am useless,Some say I am no human,Few find me unfathomable,Special few uncondition love.

Some people say I am vagrant,Some say I am uncouth jerk,Few find me unreasonable,Special few uncondition love.

Finance Minister has kept tax slabs unchanged this budget 2015-16. Disagreeing with the popular notion, I welcome this. I’ll tell you why.

It goes back to the root question, “What do we expect of our Govt.?” For me personally, I expect my life to get better. Public amenities to get better, Traffic situation to get better, Better Roads, Better Air, Affordable Housing. I expect to retire early and save enough for leisure. For me none of these wishes are granted by easing of Tax-Slabs. A few thousand rupees extra in my pocket seems nothing but a bribe.

Yes BRIBE. It feels like Govt. throwing bones to a dog. Something like, “We won’t do anything to give you a better quality of life, but here, I am throwing few thousand bucks to you. Lap it up and shut up. Vote for me the next time too”. For me it’s nothing better than a MNREGS like subsidy. I am totally against it.

दिल में उठा है दर्द सा कुछ,रह रह कर के आता है,सह सह कर के जीता हूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।

भुन्नैटा सा यह जीवन क्यों,सपने धरे सब, ज्यों के त्यों,ख्वाइश तोड़-२ के सीता हूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।

चहुँओर मेरे है हलचल सी,पगला सा हूँ मैं देख रहा,लो हाथ रख गीता पे कहूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।

आँखें भर आती जब-तब,मेरे हाथ भी कापें जाते हैं,बोझ ये कब तक मैं सहूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।

अपना जिसको माना था,दिल था जिसके नाम किया,समेटता मैं वही फजीता हूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।

सब फुर्ती फुर्र हुई मेरी,चाहते हैं भागूं खूब तेज,इंसान हूँ, न मैं चीता हूँ,हाँ ये सच है, मैं पीता हूँ।