a man who won't listen, can't hear

It’s almost troubling that I actually want to ask YOU to stop being a dick for once.

The tables have turned and poor little Lockwood is feeling the crushing depression of his douche-bag ways.

I’ve accomplished great things this week, of course I’m proud of myself.

I'll throw you a party and get you a little chocolate gold medal too.

Alice… Hmm, I don’t think I’ve met her yet but I’ll take your word for it. You sure you’ll be alright? Or do I have to bring over some Christmas cookies to cheer you up or something?

Trust me, you'd love her. Uhh, when do I ever pass up the chance for cookies? I think you should bring me some if we're being real about it.

It happens, what can I say.

Looks like someone's all proud with them self.

Yeah I know, everyone sort of disappeared for a while. Are you sure? You don’t seem fine Jeremy..

Yeah I had to jump out of town for a while, I ran into that new girl who's moved around here whilst I was doing what I had to do.. what's her name.. Alice? She seems pretty cool. I mean, I'm not 100% - I'm like, 85% but I'll be okay.

Everything’s an enemy of yours nowadays.

Oh look, Lockwood made a funny.

Hey, you alright Jer?

Allison, hey, haven't seen you in a while. Yeah.. I'll be fine.

You okay?

Dandy as a unicorn.

Maybe because they can’t keep their fucking mouths shut and land us superior Slytherins in detention.

Superior? Please.