i moved to bankofmurica.tumblr.com

that moment when you hear someone getting home and have to brace yourself for the disappearance of your good mood

sO my friend’s dog died and she lives in new york city and so she had to take it to the vet by the subway and she put the dead dog in the suitcase on the subway and it was a pretty big dog and some dude saw that she was struggling with the suitcase so he asked if she needed help with it and he said do you mind me asking what’s in it and she didnt want to say a dead dog so shE SAID IT WAS A BUNCH OF LAPTOPS SO HE TOOK THE SUITCASE AND RAN AND I JUST 

what if someone tried to rob a nightclub and he ran in and screamed “everyone put your hands up” and everyone was like “yeah dude” and kept dancing

theresa howmanypancakes is such a bully

Idk whose URL that is cause it’s not mine

go away its too long

That’s not what she said

Shout out to the people who have already asked the exact questions from my homework on yahoo answers