Let me out

*walking into the morgue to find body parts scattered across the floor* oh my god who closed last night

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

“oh I’m too old for stuffed animals” skill issue. sorry you can’t appreciate little creatures made to hang out with you, I on the other hand am full of joyous whimsy and therefore vastly superior.

I realize this is a cast iron gate but I’m choosing to believe it’s a magic protection ritual

It IS a magic protection ritual, and it summons an iron gate to protect you from intruders. 

“I cast Iron Gate!”

As a blacksmith I have been called a wizard by several small kids

"do it scared" is valuable advice but it'd also be SIIIICK and AWESOME if it stopped being scary at some point. any point

“Why would you stop in hell?” has changed my brain chemistry