Growing realization

For everyone else: I'm a 32 year old cis male dom, and this is a text post blog for original kink stories, mostly about breeding and/or nonconsent.

See here for more about what I post and my actual opinions about it (spoiler: I'm not actually a monster), but a few quick notes about this blog:

It won't have any homophobia, transphobia, or misgendering. (If you're actively looking for that, go here.) It will have some misogyny and bioessentialism, along the lines of "you were made to be bred".

This is all fantasy, and if it's mostly quite dark that's because I've been in a happy kinky poly relationship for several years, so the sweet stuff happens in real life. Actual misogyny, etc. is not welcome here.

Asks and DMs are welcome, and I always read them - but because I have limited writing capacity, I often don't respond, or respond to asks months later. So don't take silence as a negative reaction.

I do my best to respect DNIs and other preferences; let me know if I step on your toes.

If you like my writing, I also have many gif captions under the name fulfilledpurpose (with the -ed) on the site that sounds like "bee de-assembler" - but that site is extremely flaky and I'm most active here these days.

But girls' eyes dilate when I look at them, and I can see what's inside. I can see every time she's shamefully come to the thought of being raped. I can see every secret fantasy of giving up on independence and being barefoot and pregnant for a living.

Do you know how easy that makes it? There's already an opening I can use to push myself into her. A gap in the shape of an indistinct man who will rape and rule her. All I have to do is shape the edges of it so that it matches me perfectly; you can almost hear the click.

I can't tell anyone at work, I can't tell any of my friends or family, the only person I've told has been a fuckbuddy who knows breeding is a big kink of mine. They're not likely my baby daddy, but whenever I get pregnant again and can take it to full term they can fuck me when I'm 7 months or more along.

I feel so good and calm knowing I'm pregnant. It feels like I'm finally doing what I'm told. I want to advertise on grindr that I'm a pregnant slut ready to take more cocks but I'm not along far enough to count I think.

I want to keep this baby as long as I can until people might start asking questions, though people see me as a man. I want to tell everyone that I'm carrying a child but I feel like they won't believe me. So in the meantime I'm just telling people online about how I'm just a sexy pregnant man whore who loves being knocked up like he's supposed to be.

I could only take it to full term and give birth if I had either a support system or someone made me. They'd probably have to tie me to a bed or keep me in a cellar.

I didn't even have a chance to have a crappy resumption of menstruation before a cis man got me pregnant :) he was so nice to make sure that didn't happen

God, this is so good. "I wanted to see if I could get knocked up", and you could - without even a single period before you conceived. I wonder if it was the very first egg you released, once you started again after all those years on T? The one that's growing inside you right now.

It's a shame someone would have to intervene, for you to keep doing what you should - especially since you're so obviously suited for it. Maybe if you advertise enough, though, someone will. I'm sure there are plenty of guys on Grindr who'd get off on the idea that they were fucking a pregnant slut, even if your belly was still flat - and the thought might occur to one of them that all they'd have to do to change that last part would be to prevent you from leaving.

I had given a blowjob a couple years prior. And that summer and fall I did try and casually meet with people, and it fell through every time. Lot of cheaters and creeps.

That Sunday, I say fuck it and make a temporary account on a website (not grindr but similar). 30 minutes I find a nice thick cock, he gets to my house another half hour later.

He’s very sweet, says since this is our first encounter we can just cuddle, I think he could tell I was nervous. But I knew I wanted more.

So we end up fucking raw. It was fucking fantastic. He stretched me out so good I literally dripped for the next three days. I wasn’t on birth control so I got Plan B, which sucked.

We ended up meeting more and more, I got an IUD, and now he’s my boyfriend. He has to go away for work for close to a year in a couple months, so we’ll take a break then and see how we feel when he comes back. I’ll probably get around a little but I’ll be busy and he won’t have much opportunity either because he’s not out as pan. But I love him so much. I love begging for his cum (he likes it on my face and in my throat and my pussy and it’s so fucking good) and he loves my ass. He gives me mating bites. He’s so sweet and I love touching him and I love his cooking and just a lot more.

And I want to have his baby so bad. HE wants me to have his baby so bad. I moan his name while fantasizing about his creampies knocking me up. I hope we’ll get back together, because he’s so gorgeous and he makes me feel so handsome and our babies would be so pretty.

He’s not out yet, but again, if we get back together, I told him I wouldn’t be a secret and he completely agreed. Some part of me feels scared, because it will be a long time apart and things change, but I remain hopeful.

Additionally, I’d get my IUD removed. If we get back together, I want to sink my pussy onto his cock and fucking. Bounce and moan until he comes inside and knocks me up. I want to be a seahorse dad for him. I want to swell up and have everyone know I love him so much I let him get me pregnant with his child.

Anyway, this isn’t the most sexual ask but I just wanted to put this out here to let everyone know that if you are alloromantic/allosexual, the right person is out there. Wish us luck! And good luck to you.

"This isn't the most sexual ask" combined with "I lost my virginity by getting creampied by a total stranger while not on birth control and now I love begging for his cum and want to have his babies" is very funny. If this isn't sexual, what is?

It seems like there's magic in taking unprotected loads of cum into your womb, huh? I've heard so many true stories about virgins - and even people who weren't, but had never taken bare cock to the end before - getting fucked like that, expecting it to be a casual thing, and then falling in love.

Maybe it's not such a surprise, though, given the natural consequences. Your body doesn't know that you could get Plan B. All it knows is that you're overflowing with a man's seed, and now you might bear his child. Of course it wants you to form an emotional bond - it wants you to make him stay.

Now, though, it's quite the opposite. You want him to come back so you can bear his child. You've promised him that if he returns to you, your womb will be unprotected and ready. I don't see a mention of wedding rings here, either: just that you want to be paraded around, proudly pregnant for the first man to ever push himself inside you.

I’m FTM and really like your blogs. However, I’m weaning myself off of detrans because obviously it can be hurtful to some people.

Sadly, some of the HOTTEST breeding stuff is on detrans blogs because it’s all about crossing boundaries and so on. + it’s a guy/nb getting fucked full of cum so that’s a double whammy for me, as opposed to the general women getting stuffed.

Is there any chance you could import some of your transgender asks onto here? That one where they guy was playing video games and his buddy randomly starts humping him because it’s free pussy, that definitely leans somewhat to detrans but also would make for a fantastic ‘fulfilling the purpose of pussy’ type thing.

There’s better examples but yeah.

Again, this is more work for you, but it would be appreciated.

Next ask involving a virginity end-goal date is mine :)

Sorry, but no. This blog and my orientation play blog are separate for good reason; I wouldn't want to reblog posts from there to here because then I'd either be breaking the promise that this one won't have any homophobia/transphobia/etc, or I'd have to do cumbersome editing passes to remove that. These blogs are already quite a bit of work and I'm not going to take on more of it for a pretty niche benefit - for one thing, that would compete directly against me making new posts.

If you want to make a blog to do that editing yourself, though, I wouldn't mind, as long as you credited me and linked back to the originals.

Because he can't legally work, he's been working under the table to support us. He won't let me get a job, and honestly he barely lets me leave the house at all. He does all the cooking, cleaning, shopping, everything. Most days I don't even get out of bed because there's nothing I need to do now that Uni is on break.

The thing is... I don't really mind? I don't want chores or a job, and I like that he takes care of literally everything. He says it's his responsibility and that I should just stay home where he knows I'm safe. The only thing stressing me out is that his visa runs out next year.

A few months ago, I asked him to take my copper iud out. I told him it was because of the pain (which oh my god, it was constant agony) but there’s a tiny secret second reason. Understand, I have NEVER wanted kids. I mean antinatalist kind of never ever. But now, with him, I’m deep in this rabbit hole. I mean, I’m already home all the time. He figured that part out quickly and has been excited. I’m still stressed about the visa so I’ve been holding off, and he’s been respectful of that, but I kinda wish he would just make the choice for me and tell me we’re ready.

Anyway that’s my story. It’s nice to be able to write it somewhere.

It's fascinating, really - how many girls think that they have deep, principled objections to ever having children, and how quickly those reasons just... evaporate.

I've written about this before, in the abstract, but every girl's story has its own special savor to it. In your case, it's as simple as "well, if I'm being kept at home already, and I have a man taking care of everything, then..."

There's no inherent link there, you know. You could just live like a princess. But something inside you - I'll leave it as an exercise to the reader to say exactly what - tells you that when a man makes you feel safe, domesticated, and cared for, you should have his babies.

And it's not even that you want to choose that now: you want him to decide that you're going to be pregnant. You want him to show you that your destiny is to be a pampered little babymaker, with nothing to do except grow his offspring.

Yes.

You know it's wrong? Scroll a little more, sweetheart, and you can stop knowing.

After all, you weren't made to resist. You can't stop my words from slipping deeper into you, any more than you could stop my seed.

It's sweet, though. That feeble little flicker of resistance. That moment of hesitation before you spread your legs and whimper.

i know i should probably take this to my therapist but i hate hate hate myself for having this kink. i was actually sa’d irl, repeatedly, for years, while people said “it’s just boys being boys” and i was scared of getting pregnant so i starved myself to make my period go away. and i fucking hated my body so much that i cut it up. being female is a curse, we’re smaller and weaker and almost every society has been patriarchal. in a way sex itself is a curse too, just look at how common rape has been in human history and in animals too. you and i are probably descended from at least one rape victim. my life would have been so much better if i weren’t female and the world would be better if sex didn’t exist. yet i have a rape and forced breeding and misogyny kink and i hate myself for it. i know it’s my brain coping with trauma but i feel impure for it it’s like my rapists left a mark on me that will never go away. even outside of kink, when i dress nicely and look pretty i feel guilty for enjoying this body that’s brought me so much pain. every time i cum i feel so ashamed. i’ve tried to get myself cut, and failing that, to do it myself, so if i don’t feel pleasure i won’t want this anymore, but i’m always too scared. i hate myself, i hate this body, and i hate myself for enjoying this body. therapy didn’t help. meds didn’t help. time didn’t help. i don’t know why i expect you to help. but you seem like a gentle man outside of kink stuff. you treat people here with respect. i know it’s a lot and unfair to ask but please tell me it’s not a curse, that there’s something worth living in my body for, that i don’t have to hurt myself. please talk me out of this im so tired of fighting myself

Taking for granted that I'm not a therapist and don't have any magical ability to find the words that will help you dig yourself out of years of trauma and self-hatred - I think my answer boils down to two things: (1) purity is bullshit, and (2) pleasure is good and suffering is bad.

To the first point: a batch of medicine manufactured under sterile conditions is pure. Distilled water is pure. What the fuck would it even mean for a human being to be "pure"?

Obviously, the traditional answer is "unfucked." Specifically, "female, and young, and fuckable, and unfucked." I hope I don't have to convince you what a ridiculous, anti-human idea that is - but it's a ridiculous, anti-human idea that has its hooks deep in our culture, so it's easy for it to creep into your thoughts even if you don't consciously believe it.

If you take that away, what you're left with is feelings - roughly in the dirty-bad-shameful-wrong-want-to-crawl-out-of-my-skin cluster. Which still sucks. It's difficult and painful. But feelings are easier to deal with if you aren't trying to convince yourself there's something true about them - if you can experience them as mental weather.

As to pleasure and suffering: by the numbers, and based on the content of this ask, I'm guessing you were raised Christian. And there's a deep strain of Christian thought that pleasure - especially sexual pleasure - is inherently suspect: sinful unless experienced in exactly the right ways, for the right reasons, and an easy path to hellfire. And, on the other hand, shame and suffering are frequently obligatory, if not outright noble.

Now, call me an angry atheist, but I think that's evil. There are, of course, valid reasons to forgo pleasure and to willingly endure suffering, but only to other ends - because you're doing it to achieve something, hopefully something that increases pleasure or decreases suffering in your own life or others'.

You can see where I'm going with this, I imagine. You feel ashamed, you hate yourself, because you feel pleasure in the "wrong" way - a way that hurts no one. You do this, if I'm reading you correctly, because you were fed poison about what kind of pleasure is "okay", and what makes a young woman "valuable" instead of "tainted". So you want to hurt yourself, to atone, to whip yourself back to "purity" and cut away your ability to feel pleasure forever.

You don't have to.

You've endured some terrible things; it's no surprise that pushes you to dark places. But what I want you to know is that it's good for you to feel pleasure, in whatever form it takes. And it's bad for you to suffer - there's nothing redeeming about it, and you don't need to be redeemed.

I'm not hurting you. I've been careful about that. It wouldn't be hard for me to hurt you - not at all - but I haven't.

I haven't even let you hurt yourself, in fact. And you would have, if you tried thrashing around. But I made sure you couldn't.

So what's violent about this? You opening up for me, gently, like you were made to. Opening up and letting me in.

It's very simple, in the end. Your body can do amazing things. It can build entire human beings from scratch, given nothing but one sperm cell apiece. It can rework your whole body to carry each one for nine months, and even realign your bones to help you give birth.

But it won't fight. Not well. It doesn't build muscle like a man's body does - not even if you try, and he doesn't.

to convince women that their biological reality of ovulation doesn't matter, and that you can shut that off, and that you can take control of that. Well, God created that! And that's not yours to take control of.

From being steeped in a context where that's all just fun play stuff, my reflexive response is "wow, it's pretty hot for her to get up in front of all those people and say that", but then a moment later it's

You know, it genuinely took me a few minutes to realize that you mean you're pregnant.

Because as I've said before, "mommy-to-be" is a very cute term. By connotation, it means "currently pregnant". But literally speaking, any girl who's ever going to have a baby - but hasn't yet - is a "mommy-to-be". There are lots of mommies-to-be reading this. Some of them don't know it yet.

But you don't mean that, do you? You don't just mean that you've accepted that sooner or later a man will rape you, and then you'll become a mommy. You mean that you're already on your way, with your rapist's child nestled securely in your womb.