Wannabe yo-yo master

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

I love this post

The horse thinks as it scratches an itch

your dashboard is supposed to be at LEAST halfway full of shit you have no context for and fandoms you're not involved in. it is the natural way of the universe

We all need diverse ecosystems

i spot a plus size honey across the bar and start to chat her up until her bisexual boyfriend with a magic the gathering tattoo comes over and starts yelling at me so i turn him sideways so he can't make another action until his next turn

they teach you the golden rule, treat others how you want to be treated, but in a pinch you can apply the silver rule (be kinda selfish because you’ve earned it) or even the bronze rule (manipulate others purely for your benefit).

There's also the stone rule: Just start hitting people.

that’s right

my cherios spelled out my exact address this morning but like what the gudge ever i gobbled those honey nut freaks up and licked the bowl too

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

Then bring me luck

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

Hey Potato, cure my -ing cold so I can have a good time while away.

Here's the potato. Make what use of it you will. :)

fired from my job at the microbiology lab and having to carry all my things out in a little cardboard box the size of a thimble

people will call rap overstimulating and then listen to hyper pop

i cant talk to people who hate on entire genres about music they have a sinister aura that i do not want to interact with

Even if it's Country?

yes hot take the hatred of country music as a whole will often come down to classism i love country music i love bluegrass i love folk and writing off a whole genre or type of music is crazyyyyyyy

I know for a fact other dimensions and realities exist because that’s where some of you people are watching tv