hehe

a beautiful american woman curling up in bed with a hamburger bun pillow + slice of cheese blanket

her name is patty :)

Several live aquarium YouTube channels had to break off their sponsorship deals when BetterKelp admitted to selling their pets’ data. It was all a phishing scam.

I make fun of coffee drinkers for being physically addicted to and dependent on badbreath bitterdrink but when i dont have my morning tea i feel like a mentally ill caveman about to do something bad.

you’re all gonna love me for slamming cans of mango monster in the morning

^ the jittering trembler

^ The nefarious anglerfish

Little Beepo’s unfocused bloody rage is increasing

“and the fans are throwing celebratory rats on the ice” god I love hockey

"schitzoposting" is just "derp holds up spork XD" for people who fumble harsh noise trannies

peested lol

how fucking funny would it be if the new tumblr monetization strategy of "employ the bare minimum amount of staff to keep the lights on and never update anything" actually ends up being the secret sauce that makes this site finally turn a profit after three different CEOs over a decade and a half drove themselves insane trying

my advice for not going insane? try to do something every weekend. go to events, you’ll love events. and not like just hang out with ur friends or go clubbing , no, make a day out of going to some local market by yourself or attend some strange convention event you’ve never heard of. i cannot stress the importance of doing random events on a friday night or saturday or a sunday at r pm for mentally ill people especially if you’re depressed and have been searching for an anchor 2 tether yourself to. attend some events now

seeing a lot of tags on this like “i would do this but my social battery is low and i have social anxiety” great news! so do i! and YOU are the target audience of this post in fact! i speak from experience when i say that if you do this often enough then things will probably get easier for you and you’ll feel a lot less afraid around social environments. literally go to random conventions about vacuums or flea markets near where you live and like talk to the people there. ask them about their weird niche interests or what they’re selling like YOU don’t even have to be the one TALKING the great thing is you can just go to these things to interact with people for like one time and you’ll never have to worry about meeting them again probably. these are great for like test runs of social interactions ok. rule number one of my life do not block yourself off from things you could potentially be interested in because you are afraid of saying the wrong thing at them or something because that will just open you up into spiraling into thinking you are deserving of nothing good like this like you HAVE to stop thinking like that as soon as possible. and not because some random guy on the internet says that it’s good to shut that part of your brain off for whatever reason This is literally for your own benefit. so yeah go down to the library and ask the lady at the desk what her favorite book is not only will it enhance your life it will enhance the lives of others. fucking have fun and fuck it and ball and live joyously even in small doses cuz even small doses of living are still LIVING!!!!!!! GO HAVE FUN!!!!!!!! ITS GREAT