French or Bust!

Bonjour,

Here are some ideas, from easier to harder:

Answer very simple questions

Narrate your daily actions

Make a portrait of someone you know

Talk to Siri, Google home etc in French

Summarize movies or books you liked

Tell stories from when you were little

Answer harder questions

Ramble about your favourite things

Describe difficult concepts (Schrodinger, Pavlov, Milgram, etc)

Explain modern life to your favourite french figure from the past (cellphones, the internet, flying, social media, vaccines, etc)

Debate controversial topics (with parts, subparts, and examples)

Developers usually have a rubber duck to talk to when they can’t understand why their code is wrong; it could be a good idea to find 'someone’ to talk to.

Hope this helps! x

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I quit my last job in January because it was awful. Took a couple weeks off because I was sick. Fully intended to get a new one as soon as possible, especially because I’m ineligible to unemployment (since I quit), and then our new friend Corona arrived and took a seat.

I used my savings, until it was all gone. Still have to pay rent, bills, and (cat) food. And now that we’re officially quarantined, so I’m not quite going to be getting out of this situation next week. I don’t even receive job offers anymore.

So here I am, offering private tutoring on Skype. 15 euros an hour, can be a one-time thing, weekly, monthly, regardless of your time zone; we’ll make it work. (And if you have five bucks hanging around, my Paypal is [email protected]. I hate doing this but here we are. Vet cat food is very expensive.)

You can send me an e-mail at the same address or PM me here on Tumblr (ghost bubble) if you’re interested!

Love,

Mum

I’m often asked why the flip we spell certain words like Temps (time, weather) if it’s to pronounce it “tan” and what’s with mute final letters and all that crap. I have studied language history in detail in uni so here’s a little story time.

So. 17th century. France is governed by Louis XIII ‘the fair’ (Louis craycray XIV’s dad). His first minister is the cardinal of Richelieu, whom you might know for his fave outfit : a long red dress and a little round hat.

Printing was getting big but we had a problem : French didn’t have a grammar. Because of that, the monks who were copying books by hand didn’t have rules and were going with the flow, ‘translating’ the original version into their area’s dialect. So every copy of a same book was different, i.e. big poopy mess.

Our friend Louis went to see his fave minister and asked him to fix it. Richelieu created l’Académie Française in 1635 (today it’s Poshland, with its old writers, teachers, philosophers, who try to pretend they’re in charge and have their decisions ignored) and asked them to make up rules for french language so we’d have one unique way to (among other things) spell stuff.

Team 1 was practical and went ‘What if we chose to write phonetically to make things simpler for everybody?’ and team 2 went ‘Lol f u hippies we’re going to borrow letters from the original Latin version of words to show hoW fAnCy we are’. and team 2 won. (You’ll excuse me if i don’t remember those people’s names, it’s been a few years.) So ‘man’ is pronounced ‘omm’ but spelt ‘homme’ because ohlala in Latin it was homo/hominem wow so classy much sense.

{02.08.2020}

Digory était choqué par la disparition de son amie, Polly, et il lui a demandé oú elle est allée. Son oncle a commencé de raconter l'histoire de sa marraine. Il disait qu'elle était une femme remarquable et elle a eu du sang de fée. Avant de sa morte, elle lui a parlé d'une boîte secrète qu'il doivent brûler mais, il n'a jamais fait. Il sentait que la boîte était importante et donc, il l'a gardé. Finalement, il a découvert que la boite contenait des poudre magique qui vient d'autre monde.

Avec cette poussière, l'oncle a créé deux types de bagues: une jaune pour aller au autre monde et une verte pour retourner à ce monde. Il savait qu'il était trop dangereux d'aller lui-même. Donc, il avait dupe Polly a toucher la bague afin que Digory la poursuive. Digory et Polly devenaient les cobayes pour les blagues magique.

Avec cette poussière, l'oncle a créé deux types de bagues: une jaune pour aller vers un autre monde et une verte pour retourner à ce monde. Il savait qu'il était trop dangereux d'aller lui-même. Donc, il avait dupe Polly à toucher la bague afin que Digory la poursuive. Digory et Polly devenaient les cobayes pour les bagues magiques.