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Page 32 - Past and Present Collide

← PREVIOUS | BEGINNING | NEXT → CHAPTER INDEX - links to every story page TIMELINE - what happens and when

Scientist dad 🤝 journalist son Explaining everything in ridiculous detail

Fredrick reveals the truth about why Ellen Shepherd acted out the way she did... and how her fate ties in with the current problem that Fredrick is trying to sort out. Ollie's illusion of Gaia has been shattered by his unexpected emotional reaction, strong enough that it manages to override whatever the neurotoxin is doing to him in the moment - and Gaia does not like losing the obedience of her hosts. Ollie shares what he knows about Gaia with Fredrick. This is what I meant when I said Fredrick being Ollie’s dad wasn’t as random as it seemed - in the original story, he worked with the bizarre plants, though in the ORIGINAL, he worked on them for more nefarious purposes.

So yes, the initial study of the teru'lis as a possible mental health supplement/treatment almost got turned into a mental health Ozempic, is the best way I can describe it - a 'miracle drug' to eradicate something vilified by society that would have done more harm than good. In fact, it's actually what inspired the backstory of the research. It was also inspired by @wolkentage's story, where the study of the fruits is to do with alleviating physical pain. The Al-Simharan researcher is a playful reference to Saheen from her story The Infected.

I think there is a lot Ollie wanted to say to Fredrick and chose not to. I cut a lot of darlings out from my written plan for this page for that reason. As much as some bits of what Fredrick says are downright awful, all Ollie can really think is: I've finally met my dad, and we may not have each other for much longer. He doesn't want things to end on a bad note. For the most part, he isn't a vengeful person.

Fredrick lost his wife, and now, within less than a week of seeing Ollie again after two and a half decades of thinking he was dead, Fredrick risks losing his eldest son to the same infection... Can he cure it in time?

T. gondii can be read about here. It is usually associated with making infected mice less averse to cat urine, though some studies claim it makes them less averse to predators in general, which is the description I've gone with here. Ollie's description is slightly off, but he's on the right track.

There are pictures here of Ellen, looking back at the past because Fredrick is speaking of his own memory of Ellen, and he isn't infected, so Gaia isn't suppressing them the way she is with Ollie's.

Basegame classroom by 5754716 on the Gallery Rats here

Transcript:

Image 1 Fredrick: Your mother had a lot of mental health issues - she did her utmost best to keep it all from you and Dylan, but that meant we argued often when you both weren't around. Sometimes, it was something that was my fault - usually spending too much time at work and leaving Ellen to do everything at home, but sometimes, it would be for seemingly no reason at all. Ellen never put herself first; she never wanted to put her own needs before someone else's. The trouble with that was Ellen never putting herself first meant she ended up taking out a lot of the resulting stress on myself. It didn't do her or myself any favours. She didn't seem to respond well at all to talking therapies nor medication, and it took me a long time to convince her to go to therapy.

Image 2 Fredrick: It seemed the only thing truly grounding Ellen, and keeping her stable, sometimes even cheerful, was helping children. She enjoyed being a primary school teacher, and the children, fellow teachers and parents always had good things to say about her. She liked to have a sense of purpose.

Image 3 Fredrick: You and Dylan brightened her world. She loved devoting herself to you both. She would always talk about you two to everyone. Ollie: I love Mum to pieces, but I wish she'd have lived for herself a bit more… I tried to be more independent so she could rest, but… Fredrick: Ellen didn't like to think about her own mind too much. Her escape was in doing things for other people. I suppose it silenced her inner critic for a short while - made her feel less worthless.

Image 4 Fredrick: She'd tried everything, and nothing seemed to make her feel any better, nor did it make her any less tired. This was over twenty years before cowplant milk treatment was invented, but I doubt it would have benefitted her. However, I had been reading an interesting article in a medical journal - a more…controversial medical journal. The article was regarding none other than the potential curative properties of the teru'lis fruits.

Image 5 Fredrick: This was about five years before you leaving home. The article was written by an Al-Simharan researcher, who claimed that the fruits' properties could be used to treat certain chronic illnesses and as an efficient painkiller. I was one of three people who did research into this in secret - this was almost three decades ago, and working with a Sixamian plant during that period was risky, what with the xenophobia still being through the roof. No-one has heard from that researcher since, but we did find it had some potential for its psychological curative properties.

Image 6 Fredrick: Studies on mice produced interesting results. We noted that infected mice were less averse to potential threat by predators - similar to the effect of Toxoplasma gondii on mice, which you might have heard of. We believe it's a transmission strategy to increase the chances of the spores infecting another host. Ollie: That's the thing in cat's piss, isn't it? Hang on - so is that why I've been…That explains a lot, actually. A hell of a lot. Fredrick: We also noticed that they were more energetic than usual, and that gave us plenty of hope. However, we noted that almost every mouse displayed more aggressive behaviour towards other creatures, including humans. Their eyes also changed colour - to purple and red. Some displayed behaviours typically associated with maternity, even the males. Their movements became slower until their deaths, and then plants began to grow out of their bodies… We had to incinerate them to prevent the growth of the new plants.

Image 7 Fredrick: The team working on this research grew to about five people over the five years I worked on the project. Everything we'd tried, with the plants, animal testing, and isolating certain chemicals in the fruits - it amounted to very little in that time, and I had come to realise that all of the benefits - and the drawbacks - of the research came from the neurotoxicity of the spore infection. If we were given more time, we could have possibly looked further into trying to find a way to alter the neurotoxin in a way that meant it only increased energy and boosted the mood of the subject.

Ollie: 'If you were given more time?' Fredrick: We were rushed into beginning Phase 1 of human trials - but five years wasn't enough for this research. I tried explaining it to the one in charge, but it did nothing - I was treated like I was young and didn't know what I was saying. Myself and a fellow researcher believed that it was rushed because of the way society views mental illness - something to be miraculously eradicated, rather than treated gradually. The research was costly, but the Henfordian government desperately wanted people who were too mentally-ill to go back to work, and in their eyes, this 'miracle drug' would do just that - magically get rid of all mental illness, and make a ridiculous amount of money to sell to the desperate instead of treating them properly….

Image 8 Ollie: *voice unsteady* The way she was so aggressive out of nowhere… Gaia: What are you saying, Oliver?! Why are you allowing him to do this to you?! Fredrick: I was not involved in investigating that trial. I was the youngest amongst that group, and so that responsibility went to the oldest out of our group. Eventually, my 'naysaying' had me removed from researching the teru'lis. I had found work researching less controversial things in that time… only Ellen, desperate for a solution to her pain, had joined the Phase 1 of the trial without telling me that she did so… and her first injection just so happened to be on the week that I was away …

Image 9 Ollie: You were away for work again. I was pissed off about it - I remember. But - If Mum was - I didn't know. We didn't see much of her. I just thought she had a cold or flu or something… I even made her breakfast and chicken soup for dinner and brought it into her room. I didn't notice anything - or remember anything about - Fredrick: You won't always remember everything about such a traumatic memory, Oliver. Don't blame yourself. After some time, I got a call from the hospital to say my wife had been rushed in - this was after you left. Once I was finally off the plane and arrived at the hospital, she was gone - and I was told that she had the same issue that those mice had - the plants were visible under her skin and had started trying to grow out of her. We had to get her cremated as quickly as possible, and the hospital reported the adverse event to the investigator running the trial. It's the last I heard of anything else regarding the teru'lis - until now. I'm likely the only one still alive who was part of that research. Everyone else there was a lot older than myself.

Image 10 Fredrick: I assumed the worst about you and Dylan, and I shouldn't have done. I shouldn't have let my own shame and grief disregard both of my children and their wellbeing. I blamed myself for what happened - Ollie: Not giving a shit about me and Dyl was your fault - what happened with Mum wasn't. You went into that research with good intentions, you spoke up about the issues, and you were ignored by people who put money before wellness. That wasn't your fault. Fredrick: There's something else I believe I should tell you, Oliver. The doctors asked me some questions about Ellen and changes with her mental health, but nothing they told me she did fit at all. She was threatening the staff, screaming at them, her movements were stiff, and she was yelling about … about 'Gaia'.

Image 11 Ollie: I see. | Gaia: Oliver- | Ollie: Be quiet. Fredrick: I didn't know anything about the connection with New Sixam until I arrived here. The teru'lis we studied were directly from Sixam, and they were quite different from the teru'lis here - I'm assuming to do with genetic drift of some sort. They all descend from the spores on the meteorite, so they're not as diverse as they are up on Sixam. Ollie: Dad, I should be honest with you about a few things as well - in my attempts to prove Ted Roswell was lying about the Sixamians, I broke into the lab. I don't know if you know, but 'Gaia' is in the lab. She's an enormous flower - and she's the source of all of this. Gaia: You're making me sound like I'm doing it on purpose - to be cruel! What's gotten into you?! Ollie: *speaking in a droning, un-rehearsed tone* She's been here for 200 years. Was treated like a god by the Indigenous peoples, and probably by other people during that time. From what I gather, the reason they all died is because of her and the plants. At some point, conditions changed - probably to do with human and Sixamian settlement.

Image 12 Ollie: The spores were dormant until conditions changed, and so was Gaia, and then Ted's building of the lab interrupted her dormancy and threatened her, and then she spread a cloud of spores as a kind of 'emergency' colonisation of New Sixam. That's what the explosion was, I think - a combination of that cloud of spores and the weird vibrations she lets off - they make the plants grow, it's like a communication thing. *takes a breath* She talks to you, in your mind, when you're infected. I guess it's different with everyone, but she stops me from remembering Ellen and Ruby's face - she stops me dreaming about them - says it's to protect me, also says it's to make me a better host to her 'children'. Gaia: What are you doing? Ollie: I thought you wanted people to know you were in the lab? Ollie: The research around the teru'lis here is because Ted wants to put New Sixam on the map and bring it into the future - he's working with the military to develop it into a bioweapon. Fredrick: Are you… are you serious?!

Image 13 Ollie: *with his voice growing more teary as he speaks* I already know about the infection stopping the heart, Dad. I found something about it at the lab. I came here to try and help out the Sixamians, and I fucked it up completely. If Ruby were still alive, I dread to think what she'd feel about me. And now thanks to this infection I don't have the time to try and put it right. I had Ellen, I had Ruby, I have Dyl, I have my two closest friends from my university days who I love to pieces, who more or less saved my life, even if we never have time to talk. I have a job I enjoy - or maybe had at this point - by some miracle, I can afford to look after myself and Dylan - just about. I wanted an alien baby, in honour of Ruby. If not that, I wanted to adopt a Sixamian kid - give them a fresh start, like Ruby did for me - and now I can't do any of those things. Even if this didn't kill me, I could never have a wife, either - there's alien plant spores in every corner of my fucking body and they're probably going to be there for years to come. We could never have children - there's a chance the spores could cause some sort of illness or condition…

Gaia's thought-discussion with Ollie: (Oliver, there's no need for-) / (You aren't doing yourself any favours by-) / (Oliver! Stop trying to shut me out!) / (My blessing is NOT an infection!)

Image 14 Ollie: *about to cry, voice unsteady* I've only just met you after 24 years apart, and now we might have less than a week before the inevitable happens. I only wish we met under different circumstances… I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry… Gaia's thought-discussion with Ollie: (After all I've done for you…! I was wrong about you - you're worthless, ignorant, selfish!)

Image 15 Ollie: *crying intensely* How am I supposed to tell Dyl that I'm not coming home?! Fredrick: You don't know that for certain yet, son.

[image two] Faustus. "Sure you don't want to join me?"

Toby, sheepish, bashful, shy, etc etc. "Maybe next time..."

[image three] sfx; smelly alpha pheromones

[image four] Faustus, again, while kissing Toby's neck. "You're sure?"

Toby, again, while laughing. "Maybe next time."

[image five] Faustus, sniffing Toby like his life depends on it. "Alright, see you in a week."

Page 32 - Past and Present Collide

← PREVIOUS | BEGINNING | NEXT → CHAPTER INDEX - links to every story page TIMELINE - what happens and when

Scientist dad 🤝 journalist son Explaining everything in ridiculous detail

Fredrick reveals the truth about why Ellen Shepherd acted out the way she did... and how her fate ties in with the current problem that Fredrick is trying to sort out. Ollie's illusion of Gaia has been shattered by his unexpected emotional reaction, strong enough that it manages to override whatever the neurotoxin is doing to him in the moment - and Gaia does not like losing the obedience of her hosts. Ollie shares what he knows about Gaia with Fredrick. This is what I meant when I said Fredrick being Ollie’s dad wasn’t as random as it seemed - in the original story, he worked with the bizarre plants, though in the ORIGINAL, he worked on them for more nefarious purposes.

So yes, the initial study of the teru'lis as a possible mental health supplement/treatment almost got turned into a mental health Ozempic, is the best way I can describe it - a 'miracle drug' to eradicate something vilified by society that would have done more harm than good. In fact, it's actually what inspired the backstory of the research. It was also inspired by @wolkentage's story, where the study of the fruits is to do with alleviating physical pain. The Al-Simharan researcher is a playful reference to Saheen from her story The Infected.

I think there is a lot Ollie wanted to say to Fredrick and chose not to. I cut a lot of darlings out from my written plan for this page for that reason. As much as some bits of what Fredrick says are downright awful, all Ollie can really think is: I've finally met my dad, and we may not have each other for much longer. He doesn't want things to end on a bad note. For the most part, he isn't a vengeful person.

Fredrick lost his wife, and now, within less than a week of seeing Ollie again after two and a half decades of thinking he was dead, Fredrick risks losing his eldest son to the same infection... Can he cure it in time?

T. gondii can be read about here. It is usually associated with making infected mice less averse to cat urine, though some studies claim it makes them less averse to predators in general, which is the description I've gone with here. Ollie's description is slightly off, but he's on the right track.

There are pictures here of Ellen, looking back at the past because Fredrick is speaking of his own memory of Ellen, and he isn't infected, so Gaia isn't suppressing them the way she is with Ollie's.

Basegame classroom by 5754716 on the Gallery Rats here

Transcript:

Image 1 Fredrick: Your mother had a lot of mental health issues - she did her utmost best to keep it all from you and Dylan, but that meant we argued often when you both weren't around. Sometimes, it was something that was my fault - usually spending too much time at work and leaving Ellen to do everything at home, but sometimes, it would be for seemingly no reason at all. Ellen never put herself first; she never wanted to put her own needs before someone else's. The trouble with that was Ellen never putting herself first meant she ended up taking out a lot of the resulting stress on myself. It didn't do her or myself any favours. She didn't seem to respond well at all to talking therapies nor medication, and it took me a long time to convince her to go to therapy.

Image 2 Fredrick: It seemed the only thing truly grounding Ellen, and keeping her stable, sometimes even cheerful, was helping children. She enjoyed being a primary school teacher, and the children, fellow teachers and parents always had good things to say about her. She liked to have a sense of purpose.

Image 3 Fredrick: You and Dylan brightened her world. She loved devoting herself to you both. She would always talk about you two to everyone. Ollie: I love Mum to pieces, but I wish she'd have lived for herself a bit more… I tried to be more independent so she could rest, but… Fredrick: Ellen didn't like to think about her own mind too much. Her escape was in doing things for other people. I suppose it silenced her inner critic for a short while - made her feel less worthless.

Image 4 Fredrick: She'd tried everything, and nothing seemed to make her feel any better, nor did it make her any less tired. This was over twenty years before cowplant milk treatment was invented, but I doubt it would have benefitted her. However, I had been reading an interesting article in a medical journal - a more…controversial medical journal. The article was regarding none other than the potential curative properties of the teru'lis fruits.

Image 5 Fredrick: This was about five years before you leaving home. The article was written by an Al-Simharan researcher, who claimed that the fruits' properties could be used to treat certain chronic illnesses and as an efficient painkiller. I was one of three people who did research into this in secret - this was almost three decades ago, and working with a Sixamian plant during that period was risky, what with the xenophobia still being through the roof. No-one has heard from that researcher since, but we did find it had some potential for its psychological curative properties.

Image 6 Fredrick: Studies on mice produced interesting results. We noted that infected mice were less averse to potential threat by predators - similar to the effect of Toxoplasma gondii on mice, which you might have heard of. We believe it's a transmission strategy to increase the chances of the spores infecting another host. Ollie: That's the thing in cat's piss, isn't it? Hang on - so is that why I've been…That explains a lot, actually. A hell of a lot. Fredrick: We also noticed that they were more energetic than usual, and that gave us plenty of hope. However, we noted that almost every mouse displayed more aggressive behaviour towards other creatures, including humans. Their eyes also changed colour - to purple and red. Some displayed behaviours typically associated with maternity, even the males. Their movements became slower until their deaths, and then plants began to grow out of their bodies… We had to incinerate them to prevent the growth of the new plants.

Image 7 Fredrick: The team working on this research grew to about five people over the five years I worked on the project. Everything we'd tried, with the plants, animal testing, and isolating certain chemicals in the fruits - it amounted to very little in that time, and I had come to realise that all of the benefits - and the drawbacks - of the research came from the neurotoxicity of the spore infection. If we were given more time, we could have possibly looked further into trying to find a way to alter the neurotoxin in a way that meant it only increased energy and boosted the mood of the subject.

Ollie: 'If you were given more time?' Fredrick: We were rushed into beginning Phase 1 of human trials - but five years wasn't enough for this research. I tried explaining it to the one in charge, but it did nothing - I was treated like I was young and didn't know what I was saying. Myself and a fellow researcher believed that it was rushed because of the way society views mental illness - something to be miraculously eradicated, rather than treated gradually. The research was costly, but the Henfordian government desperately wanted people who were too mentally-ill to go back to work, and in their eyes, this 'miracle drug' would do just that - magically get rid of all mental illness, and make a ridiculous amount of money to sell to the desperate instead of treating them properly….

Image 8 Ollie: *voice unsteady* The way she was so aggressive out of nowhere… Gaia: What are you saying, Oliver?! Why are you allowing him to do this to you?! Fredrick: I was not involved in investigating that trial. I was the youngest amongst that group, and so that responsibility went to the oldest out of our group. Eventually, my 'naysaying' had me removed from researching the teru'lis. I had found work researching less controversial things in that time… only Ellen, desperate for a solution to her pain, had joined the Phase 1 of the trial without telling me that she did so… and her first injection just so happened to be on the week that I was away …

Image 9 Ollie: You were away for work again. I was pissed off about it - I remember. But - If Mum was - I didn't know. We didn't see much of her. I just thought she had a cold or flu or something… I even made her breakfast and chicken soup for dinner and brought it into her room. I didn't notice anything - or remember anything about - Fredrick: You won't always remember everything about such a traumatic memory, Oliver. Don't blame yourself. After some time, I got a call from the hospital to say my wife had been rushed in - this was after you left. Once I was finally off the plane and arrived at the hospital, she was gone - and I was told that she had the same issue that those mice had - the plants were visible under her skin and had started trying to grow out of her. We had to get her cremated as quickly as possible, and the hospital reported the adverse event to the investigator running the trial. It's the last I heard of anything else regarding the teru'lis - until now. I'm likely the only one still alive who was part of that research. Everyone else there was a lot older than myself.

Image 10 Fredrick: I assumed the worst about you and Dylan, and I shouldn't have done. I shouldn't have let my own shame and grief disregard both of my children and their wellbeing. I blamed myself for what happened - Ollie: Not giving a shit about me and Dyl was your fault - what happened with Mum wasn't. You went into that research with good intentions, you spoke up about the issues, and you were ignored by people who put money before wellness. That wasn't your fault. Fredrick: There's something else I believe I should tell you, Oliver. The doctors asked me some questions about Ellen and changes with her mental health, but nothing they told me she did fit at all. She was threatening the staff, screaming at them, her movements were stiff, and she was yelling about … about 'Gaia'.

Image 11 Ollie: I see. | Gaia: Oliver- | Ollie: Be quiet. Fredrick: I didn't know anything about the connection with New Sixam until I arrived here. The teru'lis we studied were directly from Sixam, and they were quite different from the teru'lis here - I'm assuming to do with genetic drift of some sort. They all descend from the spores on the meteorite, so they're not as diverse as they are up on Sixam. Ollie: Dad, I should be honest with you about a few things as well - in my attempts to prove Ted Roswell was lying about the Sixamians, I broke into the lab. I don't know if you know, but 'Gaia' is in the lab. She's an enormous flower - and she's the source of all of this. Gaia: You're making me sound like I'm doing it on purpose - to be cruel! What's gotten into you?! Ollie: *speaking in a droning, un-rehearsed tone* She's been here for 200 years. Was treated like a god by the Indigenous peoples, and probably by other people during that time. From what I gather, the reason they all died is because of her and the plants. At some point, conditions changed - probably to do with human and Sixamian settlement.

Image 12 Ollie: The spores were dormant until conditions changed, and so was Gaia, and then Ted's building of the lab interrupted her dormancy and threatened her, and then she spread a cloud of spores as a kind of 'emergency' colonisation of New Sixam. That's what the explosion was, I think - a combination of that cloud of spores and the weird vibrations she lets off - they make the plants grow, it's like a communication thing. *takes a breath* She talks to you, in your mind, when you're infected. I guess it's different with everyone, but she stops me from remembering Ellen and Ruby's face - she stops me dreaming about them - says it's to protect me, also says it's to make me a better host to her 'children'. Gaia: What are you doing? Ollie: I thought you wanted people to know you were in the lab? Ollie: The research around the teru'lis here is because Ted wants to put New Sixam on the map and bring it into the future - he's working with the military to develop it into a bioweapon. Fredrick: Are you… are you serious?!

Image 13 Ollie: *with his voice growing more teary as he speaks* I already know about the infection stopping the heart, Dad. I found something about it at the lab. I came here to try and help out the Sixamians, and I fucked it up completely. If Ruby were still alive, I dread to think what she'd feel about me. And now thanks to this infection I don't have the time to try and put it right. I had Ellen, I had Ruby, I have Dyl, I have my two closest friends from my university days who I love to pieces, who more or less saved my life, even if we never have time to talk. I have a job I enjoy - or maybe had at this point - by some miracle, I can afford to look after myself and Dylan - just about. I wanted an alien baby, in honour of Ruby. If not that, I wanted to adopt a Sixamian kid - give them a fresh start, like Ruby did for me - and now I can't do any of those things. Even if this didn't kill me, I could never have a wife, either - there's alien plant spores in every corner of my fucking body and they're probably going to be there for years to come. We could never have children - there's a chance the spores could cause some sort of illness or condition…

Gaia's thought-discussion with Ollie: (Oliver, there's no need for-) / (You aren't doing yourself any favours by-) / (Oliver! Stop trying to shut me out!) / (My blessing is NOT an infection!)

Image 14 Ollie: *about to cry, voice unsteady* I've only just met you after 24 years apart, and now we might have less than a week before the inevitable happens. I only wish we met under different circumstances… I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry… Gaia's thought-discussion with Ollie: (After all I've done for you…! I was wrong about you - you're worthless, ignorant, selfish!)

Image 15 Ollie: *crying intensely* How am I supposed to tell Dyl that I'm not coming home?! Fredrick: You don't know that for certain yet, son.