What do you do when prayers feel like they’re hard to pray? My prayer life has always been tumultuous and recently, I’ve found it hard to pray out loud. I’m so exhausted and nothing is changing. I know God will fulfill His holy will in my current situations, but I’m struggling to trust Him. When I pray, I feel such a heaviness and have so many doubts. Others are praying for me, but I do not feel helped or loved. I feel so alone and yet I know I am not. I’m not depressed, I’m not hopeless, but there are long moments where I just feel so alone and fearful and heavy.
"26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And He who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose."
“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit."
"3 Consider Him who endured from sinners such hostility against Himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. 4 In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5 And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons?
“My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,
nor be weary when reproved by Him.
6 For the Lord disciplines the one He loves,
and chastises every son whom He receives.”
7 It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 8 If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, that we may share His holiness. 11 For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."
When I'm in that place, I go to the Scriptures to be reminded that God is in control and knows what He's doing, that He is faithful, and good, and compassionate, and that He knows what I'm going through and that He loves me.
These are the times when prayer is most important. When you feel empty, exhausted, and heavy, like you're pinned down under a gargantuan weight, that's when prayer really matters. You have to fight through the feelings and pray anyway. I know, that's much easier said than done. It's so hard to do when it feels so useless. But we have to walk by faith and not by sight. We can't let our feelings dictate our behavior. The purest worship we can offer the Lord comes out in moments like these.
If you can't form the words to pray dynamically, then pray traditional prayers, or pray the psalms. Be honest with the Lord and tell Him what you feel. And confess that you're going to trust Him anyway. No matter how you feel, stay the course. This time will come to an end, it won't last forever. At the right time, God will move. He will answer you, He will keep His promises and show you His faithfulness, and you'll come out better than when you went in. And when He does, publicly thank and praise Him for all He's done.
I know it's hard, believe me, I feel for you. But hang in there. The Lord will come through for you, and be glorified in you. I'm praying for you too!