1. There's a booth on campus handing out these colorful little flags and talking about a big party - everyone's welcome, the banner says, and he isn't really sure about the specifics because there sure seem to be a lot of them being talked about in dizzying degrees of detail - way more than he remembers from the whole Gay-Straight-Alliance thing in high school, but he sees the word "Ally" is still involved, and the people at the booth seem really nice, and going to strange parties is part of the college experience, right?
Six hours later he's pretty drunk and pretty happy because holy shit he's seen so many girls making out with each other at this party? And now the guy he's been avidly listening to talk about his sports science senior project for an hour has his hand on his dick and he's saying, "Come on, when it comes down to it, a mouth's a mouth, let me blow you, you'll like it I promise," and like, it would be rude, right? To just show up to this party for queer people and be uptight about it just because he's straight. And like, maybe the guy's right? How would he know if he doesn't try it? Isn't college for experimenting with stuff like this anyway?
So he says, "Okay, yeah - why the hell not?" and the guy gets down on his knees - fuck, right there in this little side parlor of this weird too-big house they're partying in and maybe it should feel weird but then again there's a girl one couch away sucking on another girl's tits, which, fuck yes - except he kind of forgets about that part pretty quickly, though, because turns out, a mouth is a mouth, and dudes give pretty great blow jobs. He's a little relieved when the guy jerks himself off while blowing him because he doesn't know how the fuck he'd return the favor, but like, it's really flattering too? He's only ever had one girl rub one out while blowing him before and this just confirms that he really likes it when the person he's with really enjoys giving head as much as he enjoys getting it.
When it's over Buck (though of course he was still just Evan then) says, "Thanks, man, you're really good at that. Like, I'm kind of bummed out that I'm straight now," and the guy laughs at him like he's said something hilarious, and he winks and kisses his cheek and says, "You'll figure it out," before taking himself off back to the party and his friends. And maybe he would have sooner, but most of that night is blurry in his memory in the end. It was a good night, though. He remembers that much, and being glad that everyone really was welcome.
2. He goes to a pride parade for the first time sort of on accident, because he was traveling through a town on his way to a new construction site his buddy lined up a job for him at for a couple of months. He ends up stuck on a dead end closed for the parade trying to navigate the unfamiliar town but hey, cool, he knows those flags! He parks and comes to stand at the sidelines and watch. There he sees an older woman holding a sign that says "Mom Hugs!" and gets a little emotional watching people in the parade get emotional running over and getting hugs from this Mom. He doesn't ask for a hug because he doesn't feel like it's his place, but he wonders what it feels like, getting a hug from a Mom who loves you. Probably pretty good.
At one point, some asshole wanders up to the sideline near Buck and starts loudly talking some shit about the people in the parade, somehow unaware of the irony of the "it's a free country! I can say what I want!" he yammers when someone tries to tell him to fuck off. Buck isn't about to start a fight, he's not a violent guy and that's probably not helpful anyway, but one thing he has is lung capacity and six plus feet of construction-work-hardened body, so when a young woman in the parade holds up her "Love is Love" sign and yells it at the bigot, Buck stands as tall as he can and picks up the call loudly enough to drown the asshole out when he tries to say something awful to her. He puts himself between the guy and the parade, stays there repeating the chant right at him - gets called a slur or two but better him than anyone else at the parade, right? Together with the rest of the people taking the chant up around him, they drown the guy out. The guy visibly considers taking a swing at him but decides he's too big and instead just fucks all the way off.
And like - he didn't do it for the attention or anything but the people in the crowd and the parade cheer for him when he's run the guy off and like - he thinks he gets it, what the parade is for, what it means to show up in number, queers and allies alike. He waves and laughs, and then this absolute smokeshow of a woman walks over from the parade and plants a kiss on him as everyone around them hoots and hollers. Pretty great all around.
He decides to stop for the night in the town since it's getting late when the parade is done and ends up at a bar and grill place down the road from the motel since it's one of the only places still open for food in walking range - and just by chance he runs into that same woman who kissed him. She's out with her friends, so he just sends a round of drinks over to their table with a friendly wave and leaves them to it - except then she comes over to him, and gosh, she's so pretty, she's tall and she's got these high cheekbones that make her look like she could be a model or something, and her makeup is all sparkly from the parade. Her voice is soft and low and he has to lean closer to hear it, which is definitely not a problem because she smells like sunshine - like sunscreen and sweat and some citrusy floral perfume. When she asks how she's never seen him around before, he mentions that he's just there for the night - and she immediately more or less invites herself to his hotel room, which is also very much not a problem.
And like. Okay, so, yeah, they get back to his room and it turns out she has a dick? But like, she's not calling it a dick, she's calling it a clit, and he knows what to do with a clit pretty well by now, so he just follows her lead and you know what? Turns out fucking a hot girl in the ass is still fucking hot no matter what size her clit is. She helps him rub her off the way she likes it, and she cums pretty hard with him inside her, which is basically his favorite part of sex ever. In the morning she seems really happy when she kisses him goodbye - so all in all, he figures he did pretty dang good at being an ally for his first pride parade.
3. So he goes to pride now, whenever it works out for his life and schedule. In LA it's practically an entire festival, it's great. They obviously don't need the same kind of allyship from him as a small town parade when the whole city gets behind it to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars, but the everyone's welcome sentiment seems to still hold true, and why not share in the joy? And like. Okay, it's not like the chance that he might get laid even as a straight guy isn't relevant. It's not his main reason for going, truly, but like. Hey. If he can make someone happy with his dick too then it's a damned good day.
The parade being so much bigger is so cool, though, he gets to see so many different kinds of people. His favorites are probably the leather butch bikers, or whatever they are, there seem to be a couple of different but similar groups of them, but either way they look absolutely badass and like - okay he's not being weird about it he swears, but he's incapable of not enjoying the hell out of seeing bare breasts peeking out from leather vests and harnesses. They're not for him at all, he gets that, but like, it's still awesome with the contrast to the leather and what's considered normal and allowed to be in public. He's never felt particularly normal either, so it just makes him kind of happy seeing people be proud of breaking the mold in such badass ways, thumbing their noses at the world, snarling their engines while they do it.
"They're so fucking cool," he says, mostly to himself, but the person leaning against the barrier next to him turns to him with interest like he was addressing... her? them? whatever, so he adds, "I had a bike for a minute but there's no way I ever was even a fraction as cool as that."
"I don't know, I bet you looked pretty good in leather," she says, flashing a slightly flirty smile at him as she looks him over before nodding back out at the bikers. "But yeah, they're like - the dream, right? Maybe some day I'll be out there with them."
Under a lightweight leather vest she's wearing this tight black tank top holding her tits in tight, and olive drab cargo pants over chunky motorcycle boots. She's got the short spiky hair and piercings and a ton of really cool tattoos down her nicely toned arms so he says, "I mean, looks to me like all you need is the bike, right?"
And she looks at him looking her over and looks back at him too, and suddenly there's a whole charged sort of air between them as she says, "Actually, I already bought a bike too. I'm still tuning it up, but yeah, guess I've got all the essentials, don't I? I've got what counts."
Which - hell yeah, that's the spirit, he says - and Alex invites him to come see the bike and see if he thinks it's cool enough for pride, which like, even if it's not just a come-on, he's actually interested to see because of how happy Alex looks that he thinks she could hang with the bikers in the parade.
It's definitely a come-on, though, because he ends up getting groped pretty soon after they get to the garage, and then bent over the seat of the motorcycle when he agrees sure, he can take a little manhandling. It kind of doesn't click for him that Alex is probably a dude, though, until he's got his pants around his thighs and a dick bumping against his ass. Well. Maybe it's a dick, it doesn't quite feel like skin?
He tries to turn his head to see, but Alex grabs him by the hair and turns his head forward again and says, "Stay," which - fuck, that does some things for him, wow. Good things.
And it would be such an asshole move to bail after getting this far just by being an ignorant idiot making assumptions. He's definitely turned on already, and Alex is hot, even though it turns out he's a dude. Probably? He's still not entirely sure, but it feels like an even weirder thing to ask now when he's got lubed up fingers on his asshole. And like - yeah, he's never been fucked in the ass before, but he's done it the other way around plenty of times and all those girls seemed to like it - and they don't even have a prostate, which he's heard about that being a whole thing - so why wouldn't he like it? Like, it's not like being straight has anything to do with whether or not assplay feels good, right? He knows that much. And besides. It's pride. Maybe the details like the fact that he's straight and Alex's dick is silicone really just kind of don't matter right now.
And you know what? Turns out getting fucked in the ass does feel pretty fucking good. So does doing it while bent over a motorcycle with fingers fisted in his hair while getting called a pretty little slut. Who knew?
Pride is just, so great. He's really glad queer people invented it and still decided straight people could come too.
4. Taylor is one of his favorite people he's ever had sex with because she just straight up tells him what she wants, in detail, and doesn't ever fake like he's doing something the way she likes it just to pad his ego. He feels like he's gotten so much better at giving oral because of her, and it turns out enjoying getting his hair pulled and getting bossed around in bed wasn't just a fluke either, because she's really great at both of those things too.
They have so much sex. It's so great.
"Have you ever had a threesome?" she asks him one day, kind of out of nowhere - well, maybe not nowhere, seeing as how he's in the middle of sucking on her clit while rocking her favorite dildo into her cunt, but he'd been concentrating on that rather than thinking about other sex stuff.
"Kind of?" he says, which has her making a judgmental face at him for his imprecision, but he's really not sure whether that one time at pride really counts. Like, yeah, he'd had one guy sucking on his dick, and another guy's dick in his hand while he made out with that guy's girlfriend - or so he thinks, he's not entirely sure he'd understood the complexities of the relationship, the word "polycule" might have been mentioned. He hadn't really questioned it. He'd been swept into some random house party by an outgoing girl and her boyfriend(s?) and then swept along again into the night when they were done with him before he could really process what had happened.
"Have you?" he asks, and she huffs a vaguely disgruntled little sound and says, "Yeah, several times, but it was always with another woman instead of two guys."
"That's really hot," he says, and she scoffs at him and tightens her grip on his hair and pulls him back down to work, which he's very glad to do, especially imagining her with another girl.
She's clearly seeing it in his eyes, because her smile is a little wicked as she adds, "Don't get me wrong, I loved it - like, I love fucking girls just for the love of the game, but also it's really satisfying to make a girl cum and watch her boyfriend realize he's never made her sound like that before."
"I believe it. Would love to see it," he pulls off just enough to say.
"I bet you would," she says, smirking. Her eyes are heavy and intent though as she says, "But I'd love to try it the other way around first before I do that again."
He hums as he keeps sucking on her clit, because that makes sense. Like, he probably could've guessed that from the way sometimes she likes to have him fuck her in one hole while she's got a dildo in the other. He really likes when they do that. She cums really fucking hard that way most times.
"Hey," she says, looking at him kind of incisively, and he lifts his eyebrows at her. She tugs on his hair a little and says, "Pull the dildo out."
He does, and she keeps looking at him in this way he's not sure he knows what to make of it, waiting for her instructions as to what she wants now.
"Lick it," she says. "The dildo."
He licks it. It tastes like her, of course, which is great. It barely tastes like silicone. He keeps licking it, because she hasn't said to do anything different, and her eyes are very dark the way she's watching him do it. Her voice is a little hoarse when she says, "Suck on it."
And like - that's different. For sure. He's - like he's not always the fastest to put things together, but he's definitely getting the context here. He's - yeah, he'd have a threesome with another guy for her, if that's what she really wanted. He's not sure he wants to find out if some other guy can make her make sounds he's never gotten out of her, but like... he'd still do it.
Sucking on a dildo isn't really doing anything for him, other than the way it's clearly doing something for her, given the way she curses and starts rubbing her clit while watching him suck the toy between her thighs, but he gives it his best shot. He tries to imitate the things he's seen other people do for him, ends up gagging pretty fast - and wow, he hadn't even swallowed down that much! He's suddenly way more impressed by everyone who's ever sucked him off with his extra-large dick. It's a lot harder than people made it look, though maybe having a real person to give feedback is easier than some lifeless toy. Swallowing back his spit he tries again - he feels this sort of odd determination to push himself to do better at it. He gags again but doesn't stop trying, and before long he's actually getting the hang of it?
Taylor swears and yanks on his hair, and then she's reaching down and grabbing the dildo and moving it up, holding the base of it against her mons like it's her dick. She's breathless and panting as she orders him again to, "Suck it, suck me off." Her fingers are tight in his hair and her other hand is holding the dildo, so he uses his hand to slip underneath it to rub her with his thumb and curls his fingers inside her while he gives it his absolute best effort sucking on her dick. From the sounds she's making, he thinks she likes it.
They kind of don't talk about it, after, like at all for a little bit. Taylor doesn't actually suggest they have a threesome, and he definitely doesn't bring it up - especially after the thing with Lucy happens and he feels like such an asshole when it even crosses his mind what it'd be like to have both of them in his bed. He puts it firmly from his thoughts, and almost forgets about the whole thing until one day Taylor says out of nowhere at breakfast, "What if I bought a strap-on?" and he just kind of chokes on his protein shake and says, "I mean. Yeah? Great. You should... do that."
They break up before that happens, though.
5. The other thing he loves about pride is just how much people love to dance. He's never been great at it or anything but he loves to move, loves to be immersed in a moment. All the queer clubs anywhere around the parade route are full of happy people sharing their joy, chasing new experiences. It's been a shitty few weeks, months even. He's so lonely lately. Tonight, Buck wants nothing more than to dance and let it all fade away.
He dances with so many people, smiles at so many people, gets touched by so many people. He can barely see most of them in the dark and the flashing lights, but it's also these glimpses of beauty in so many different shapes and sizes all swirling together around him. It doesn't matter who they are or who he is, it doesn't matter what's going on in his life or anyone's life outside this moment. They're here together, and it just feels good. It feels good to be wanted, wanted by anyone, he doesn't care who, because at least knows he can give them whatever they want from him on a dance floor.
Which. Turns out to be a lot, actually. Somewhat more than he expected. Hours into sweaty, intoxicated dancing, he ends up sandwiched between a couple of guys who keep making out over his shoulder, and whispering in his ear talking about how they're going to fuck him right there on the dance floor - and like, he probably should have realized they meant it, that they were asking instead of fantasizing the way he was, and that not walking away at any point during the foreplay of dancing was him making a choice to say yes. He probably should have realized all of that before he ended up with his pants undone and a hard dick tucked up against his asshole.
He's been so lonely, though. He doesn't want to pull away. He almost certainly wouldn't have even if he'd realized he was being asked seriously - so he just throws his head back and holds on to the rhythm for this latest wild June ride. Just like they promised, he gets fucked right there on the dance floor, twice in quick succession, and like - it's definitely different than a dildo, but not that different, and he enjoys the hell out of it the same way - it feels good on a simple physical level, but there's also the way it feels being wanted badly enough to misbehave - finding out just how much he likes it that people can be dancing two feet away without noticing he's getting fucked right next to them because it's so easy to disguise with a carefully-placed arm and all the dirty dancing everyone's doing.
He likes that almost as much as he likes the way a couple of women grinding on each other do notice during the second guy's turn, and very much watch as he gets fucked and jerked off right there in the crowd. They stare at him with their faces streaked with blue and pink and purple and their smiles hot and hungry as they follow suit, hands under each others clothes as they finger-fuck and grind in counterpoint to the way he's getting jerked off with a cock in his ass and a guy sucking a hickey into his throat.
Hilariously, he ends up being the only one that gets thrown out of the club - he's a little come-drunk and fumbles grabbing his pants before they fall down when his fly-by lovers ditch him before he can even finish coming down from his orgasm. He definitely flashes a few people and has to scramble to get his clothes back into place - doesn't manage it quickly enough to not get caught at it. But hey. Better the straight guy get tossed out than anyone else at pride anyway, right?
+1. "... or so I thought at the time - which, yeah, I know, I know, in retrospect... pretty ridiculous at that point, but I guess that's why we call them blind spots. So yeah, I mean, depending on how you count, yours is like the eighth or ninth dick I've fooled around with. Besides my own, of course."
Tommy looks a little shell-shocked after the recounting of (most) of his various pride-related (mis)adventures. He clears his throat a little as he sips his coffee and murmurs, "Well that at least explains some things."
"Like what?" he says, laughing as Tommy arches an eyebrow at him.
"Like when you brought me home from your sister's wedding and then climbed into my lap without even an ounce of hesitation over taking a dick up the ass for what I had definitely thought was your first time."
"It kind of was though! It was the first time I did it on purpose and because I knew that's what I wanted," Buck says, feeling as though he should be offering some kind of consolation because there's a slightly weird layer in Tommy's tone somewhere.
Tommy opens his mouth, then closes it, and instead takes another sip of coffee like it's a talisman against whatever's going on in his head.
"You're the only guy I've ever kissed," he tries, and Tommy's expression softens immediately. He reaches a hand out to cover Buck's on the table, giving him a squeeze.
"Sweetheart, I'm not - that was not a criticism in any way."
"Okay," he says, breaking off a piece of the rainbow-frosted doughnut he at least knows is for him this time.
"It wasn't. I'm just... re-calibrating."
"Why," he says, pouting a little. "Nothing's changed. I'm still the same."
"Of course you are. It's just - Evan, you've had sex with more men than I have. You've been having sex with men for longer than I have."
He scrunches up his face. He's pretty sure that's not supposed to matter? He shrugs again and says, "I mean, I told you I really like sex, that I've been with a lot of people, didn't I?"
"You did," Tommy says, blowing out his lips. "And again, I'm not criticizing here, not at all."
"Then what are you doing?" Buck says, prodding his foot out under the table to tangle with his. "Because I'm confused."
"I'll be honest, right now I'm mostly thinking about who I know that has a motorcycle I can borrow to bend you over, but I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be able to pull off leather daddy even half so well as the guy who already beat me to it," Tommy says dryly.
"It's not a competition," Buck protests, laughing.
Tommy cocks an eyebrow at him and says, "Oh it absolutely is."
Buck laughs again, because he knows that tone - the tone that says Tommy knows he's being a little ridiculous, that he's teasing - and a little serious at the same time.
He tilts his head and slants a look up through his lashes and says, "Yeah well in that case, maybe since I'm the more experienced one, it should be me who's figuring out how to rock your world with something new, you ever think about that?"
"Well now I am," Tommy says evenly as he eyes him with interest.
Buck puts another very rainbow bit of pastry in his mouth and holds his boyfriend's increasingly heated gaze... and lets him see him start to plan.
It turns out that Tommy's never gotten a blow job on a surf board before, or had sex outside at all, which is crazy. He's never fucked in the backseat of his car, or gotten road-head (which he categorically refuses, and Buck kind of can't argue with now that he's not as fucking stupid as he was at twenty two). He's never gotten a stealthy hand job on a dance floor after a pride parade before. He's never had a guy pick him up for a date on a motorcycle - and neither has Buck, but he's still got the motorcycle endorsement on his license, and rentals are a thing, and it turns out Alex was right, he does look pretty good in leather.
So while it's definitely not Buck's first pride having queer sex - not by a long shot - his first pride as a queer man? That's about as good as it gets.
