“Make that picture the first one, you look so hot in that!” she cheers pointing at the photo that was taken at the party after your graduation. You wore a nice lilac dress and sandals, you got a blowout that morning and it was still holding up well, the red lipstick you chose to wear was an exciting addition to the look. You really did feel pretty and you like the picture too.

“And now what?” you sigh when your profile is finished.

“Now you just go through the guys and swipe on them, see if you get any matches!” she smirks at you playfully.

Bonnie plops down to her bed and you turn around in your chair, hesitantly hovering your thumb over the screen before finally checking out the first profile that pops up.

The guilt that grips your chest is upsetting and not even only because of judging people from just their looks and a few emoji’s in their bio. No, it’s mostly because if you matched with any of these guys, exchanged messages and they were to ask you out on an actual date, you wouldn’t be able to say yes truthfully. Because there’s only one person you want right now, but he is kinda off limits even though you’ve been non-stop texting with him these past weeks.

“Oh!” you stop, squaring your shoulders.

“What is it? Did you find someone you know?” Bonnie jumps up in excitement.

“No, but… I think I have my first match?” Turning the phone you show her the screen with the ‘It’s a match!’ sign along with your and the guy’s profile picture.

“It has begun! You are officially on the market, my friend!” Bonnie sings, but you just shake your head laughing. You’re not entirely sure if you want to be on the market, well only if one particular tall, long haired, tattooed guy wants to take you off said market.

Thursday afternoon Harry spends hours in the library, working on a paper he knew would be a pain in the ass if he left it to the last minute, so he decided to just start it early and not screw himself over. Hunched over a pile of books and his laptop, he got a head start on the paper, though he still has a lot to work on the assignment when he decides to head back home.

School has started over a month ago and he has gotten into a sort of routine with his days, a routine that’s nothing like the one he used to drive. His first year of college he went to at least two parties a week, always had rendezvous’ with girls around campus that would end up in a quickie either in a toilet stall, in a random dorm room or his room.

He flinches thinking about the kind of person he was. Even though the girls came to him willingly, it was always empty and meaningless and for a while that didn’t bother him. But those times are over.

“Hey guys,” he murmurs his greetings walking into the house. Some of his mates are in the living room watching TV, someone is cooking in the kitchen and normally he would love to join them but he feels like he would rather just be by himself for now. However those plans are thrown out the window when he walks into his room and finds an unwanted guest.

Georgie Whitaker is lying on his bed as if she lived there, owning the place. Sprawled out, scrolling on her phone with a bored expression until Harry walks in. Smirking to herself she sits up, her dark red locks bouncing around her frame messily, but it’s the kind of mess that’s for sure intentional and she spent hours styling her hair in the morning probably.

“What are you doing here?” he growls, stepping to his desk, throwing his notebooks to the pile there, setting his laptop to the only clean space on the surface, the rest is covered in books, wrinkled papers and other school supplies. He might have been a party animal through his years in college, he never pushed it to the point where he would neglect his school work, it always came first and he still lives by that. Unlike some of his friends who go through college with one notebook and a pen, he puts time and effort into his education.

“I’ve missed you,” she coos, her legs dangling from the side of the bed, her skirt riding up dangerously high on her thighs and she knows that.

“That doesn’t mean you can just come into my room whenever you feel like it. Who let you in?”

Harry knows he’ll have a little chat with his house mates about who they are letting into his personal space when he is not home.

“You didn’t mind it when I showed up last year,” she purrs, ignoring Harry’s question. “Now you don’t even answer my texts.”

“That should be a red flag to you, Georgie,” he mumbles under his breath, still moving around the room, trying to ignore her presence, hoping that she would give up and leave.

Georgie used to be one of the few girls Harry spent more than one night with, but it was nothing romantic. They both needed relief and sometimes it was too much energy to find a girl, chat her up and bring her home and even then, it wouldn’t be granted that it would be good. Georgie and Harry hooked up for the first time last year on freshmen’s week, and they ended up repeating it a week later. From then, they had a silent agreement that if one called, the other would be there, they were using each other in a consensual accord.

The last time Harry saw her was a few weeks ago but he did everything he could to avoid her. Georgie started texting and calling, clearly desperate to get back to their old habits, but Harry lost interest a while ago, but it seems like the girl couldn’t take the hint.

“Thought you were just busy,” she shrugs. “I’ve heard that you haven’t been too welcoming with girls lately. What’s the matter, H?”

Standing from the bed she walks up behind Harry, placing a delicate hand on his back that slowly slides over his shoulder and up his neck but before she could reach his face he grabs her wrist and spins around, his eyes flaming at the girl in front of him.

“The matter is that you and every girl like you think that I owe you something. Like I live to be your toy. But I’m done with the little games. And I’m done with you.”

He is towering over Georgie, the expression on his face clearly a warning for the girl that he doesn’t wish to be played with now. The way his eyebrows knit together, the fire in his eyes and how he clenches his jaw, he appears powerful and almost scary. If only they were in a different setting and in less clothes, Georgie would almost find it exciting, but not now.

She yanks her hand out of his grip and takes a step back. She doesn’t like to be treated like this, she doesn’t like it when things don’t go her way, but there’s nothing she can do.

“You’ll be coming back to me, Styles. Begging and on your knees,” she hisses, but her warning does nothing to Harry.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Georgie,” he grunts, dismissing the hurt girl who rushes out of his room like it was on fire. The faster the better, Harry thinks.

Harry lets out a long breath pinching his nose, this was the last thing he wanted to deal with right now. To be honest, he doesn’t want to deal with anything, except… except you. Lately you’ve been the only person Harry could think about even in his worse moments, he’s been checking his phone obsessively to see if he had new texts from you and there were evenings when he was lying in bed and couldn’t stop thinking about wanting to call you and hear your voice.

He reaches for his phone with the intention of texting you, just knowing what you’re doing would easily take his mind off of everything, then he hears Mitch’s voice coming from the hallway and it stops him. He’s been the only thing that’s been keeping Harry away from you, the guilt he feels every time they run into each other and Harry feels terrible because he’s been kind of avoiding Mitch lately. They used to study together, hang out on campus, go to see the movies Sarah didn’t want to watch with Mitch, binge watching series on Netflix… now all Harry does is making up excuses why he can’t do anything when in reality he is just trying to ease his own guilt for talking to you when Mitch told him to stay away from you.

He drops the phone to the bed and decides to clear his head in another way. Changing into sports clothes and putting on his favorite running shoes, he grabs his headphones and goes for a run.

It’s been quite some time he went for his usual routine, right around campus, running a few laps in the sports center and then heading home. He used to do this at least twice a week, last year, but this semester has been just way too busy for him to take the time.

Focusing on his breathing and keeping his pace steady he finally reaches the campus, only a couple of students lingering around since it’s getting late. He wipes his forehead with the back of his hand as he heads to the sports center. The running track circles around the football field, there’s no practice today, though he spots another runner and when he recognizes the familiar figure… he stops in his tracks.

He came to this run to clear his head without bothering you, doing the right thing, yet, he is now staring at you in your tight yoga pants and hoodie, your hair in a bun high on your head. You’re wearing a wireless headset and suddenly Harry just needs to know what music you listen to while running.

Harry needs to take a deep breath as his eyes linger on your curves, the way your thighs and calves flex with every move, your heaving chest from the rapid pace you’re breathing and oh God… You surely are wearing a sports bra, but he can still see your breasts jumping up and down slightly and it’s definitely doing things to him.

Still breathing hard he walks closer, wondering how long it will take you to notice him. Leaning against a pole he folds his arms on his chest, the tip of his tongue running along his lips as you finally turn and notice him, stopping abruptly.

“Hey!” you call out, letting the headphone hang around your neck as you walk over to him.

“Didn’t know you like running,” Harry smirks down at you cheekily.

“Well, I gotta do something to keep myself going,” you chuckle lightly, still trying to catch your breath. “But I can see I’m not the only one.”

“Needed to air my head out, but I wasn’t expecting to run into you.”

“Everything alright?” you ask concerned, taking in his figure, looking for signs that tell you why he was so keen on getting fresh air.

“Yeah, just… sometimes it’s hard to leave things in the past,” he words vaguely.

You want to ask him more, wanting to hear details, but he would have phrased it clearer if he wanted to share more. But it’s still obvious that he is keen on forgetting about something and you’re more than happy to help him.

“I know we both came out for a run, but… I’m kind of starving. Do you want to grab something to eat?”

Harry knows he should say no. He should tell you he wants to finish his run and then go home, but he can’t. He is itching to be with you, to listen to whatever you have to say. So pushing the guilt down he nods at last.

The pizza place at the edge of the campus is one of the most popular places during the day and since it’s open until two in the morning, students like to stop for a late night slice on their way home from a party as well. The time you and Harry wander in is kind of a dead time sloth, so there’s plenty of empty tables and no trace of the line that usually queues long to the cash register.

You both get your slices and you grab a bottle of garlic oil from one of the tables before sitting at the one at the window.

“So how is the friend-making going?” he hums, taking the first bite of his slice.

“Oh, it’s going well! I’ve met a few friends of Bonnie and they invited me out to the movies with them,” you beam happily as you sprinkle some of the garlic oil on your slice and bite into it.

“That’s great! See, I knew you’d be alright.”

“But it wouldn’t have happened if you didn’t help,” you smile at him thankfully.

“How are things between Ruth and Erik?”

“Oh, they went on a date, but agreed that it’s better if they just stay friends, so… yeah.”

“And how about you?”

“Me?” you ask a bit confused what he means.

“Yeah, are you planning to go on dates?”

Harry beats him up for even asking right away. What was he thinking? Bringing up your dating life when he should be keeping his distance from you? There’s gotta be something wrong with his head for sure.

You’re surprised by the question, and you can’t deny that it swirled quite a few thoughts about why he might have asked, but you don’t shy away from answering.

“Haven’t been asked out on one for about two years,” you admit with an awkward chuckle.

“When was the last time?”

“Junior year, I dated this guy for a few months, he was a senior. But don’t tell Mitch, as far as he knows I haven’t had a boyfriend,” you scoff.

Because of your brother’s overprotectiveness, you kept everything and anything a secret you knew Mitch wouldn’t approve of and boyfriends were on the top of the list for sure. You’ve had two so far, one of them even met Mitch but you just never told him you were dating the guy.

“You didn’t tell Mitch?” Harry’s eyes widen in amusement as he stares at you over the table.

“How could I?” you laugh covering your mouth. “He was watching me like a hawk and even wanted to have a talk with every new friend I made. A boyfriend would have never survived him.”

“He was really that annoying?” Harry cackles.

“Yes! Do you want to know the worst of it all?”

“You know I do,” he smirks, chewing lazily.

“He even gave me the sex talk.”

Harry almost chokes on his slice and you can’t hold your laughter back as you watch him trying to regain his composure. It was truly in the top three most awkward moments in your life, having your brother talk to you about sex, but it doesn’t feel that bad right now, using it to make Harry laugh.

“He just sat down and talked about the birds and bees?”

“No, he was very straight forward, didn’t use any metaphors,” you chuckle. “Though I didn’t let him finish, ended our suffering when he started talking about STDs.”

“Oh God, I would die to hear this conversation!” he laughs, his head falling back.

“Believe me, I wanted to die right then and there,” you mumble into your pizza slice.

“So when did you have your first boyfriend?”

“Um, when you guys left for college. Dated this guy for a few months, but it wasn’t quite the match.”

“As soon as Mitch was out of the house, you jumped right into dating?” he chuckles shaking his head.

“I admit I felt a little more… free once he was off to college,” you grin at him.

“So then what about now? Do you like someone?” he asks, pretending to be unbothered when he is almost holding his breath, waiting for your answer. If you say that you actually do have a crush on some idiot from school Harry is not sure he can control his emotions.

“Uh, no. Not really. Haven’t had time to meet someone I might be interested in,” you answer clearing your throat to cover up your nervousness.

There’s a short silence where you both get to the end of your slice. Now that Harry has asked you about your dating life, you’re curious to find out more about his. Well, you know a few things about that already from the gossips and his reputation, but you’d prefer to hear the truth from Harry.

“So what about you?” you finally ask, watching him intently to see how he reacts to the question. You can tell he doesn’t feel too comfortable, but he answers anyway.

“Haven’t been on a date in a long time,” he admits, but you both know what this means. Just because he hasn’t been dating it doesn’t mean he’s been sitting around at home, playing UNO with his friends.

“I’ve heard a few things. About you.”

“Not surprised,” he chuckles bitterly, leaving the crust of his slice on the plate as he leans back and wipes his hands with a paper towel. “What do they say?”

“Just that you’re a ladies’ favorite,” you hum, but it’s not quite how you’ve heard others word it. The worst was when you overheard a girl call him a manwhore. You almost walked up and punched her in the face for talking like that about someone she probably doesn’t know and for what? Most likely because she didn’t get to have her way with him, Harry must have rejected her and now she is just jealous.

“I admit I’ve had my fair share of hookups,” he nods timidly. “But… I’m trying to change. It’s not what I want anymore.”

Harry’s eyes jump up to meet yours, as if he is waiting for a certain kind of reaction, something he fears to see, but is surprised when it doesn’t happen. Instead, you just smile back at him warmly, because all you have for him is hope and support because you believe in him, unlike many others around him.

“I think that’s good. That you want to change your old habits,” you nod reaching for a paper towel to clean your fingers from the garlic oil.

“Yeah? You think I can do that?”

“Of course,” you nod confidently.

“I think then you’re the only one to believe it,” Harry comments bitterly. Inspecting him you see the hurt in his eyes even though he is not looking at you, keeping his gaze fixed on the table in front of him. “I feel like everyone around me keeps thinking of the person I used to be and no matter what I do or say I’ll always be just my mistakes and bad habits.”

“Well, I don’t think that anyone is just black and white in the sense of being strictly good or bad. It’s never just this or that, there’s a spectrum and you can always work on yourself to move to a direction. In the past, you weren’t clearly just bad, it’s always a mixture, you did good things too and you’ll make mistakes in the past no matter how much you change. And if even after all the work you put into yourself someone doesn’t see the change in you or tries to make you believe you’re just your mistakes, you don’t need that person in your life.”

Harry stares back at you in awe, as if an angel is sitting right in front of him and he is kind of convinced that you really are one. But what he did to earn your presence in his life, he has no idea about that. What he knows is that right in this moment he can’t imagine his life without you.

Even though the pizza is long gone, you stay and talk, just whatever comes to your mind, both of you distancing yourselves from whatever you were trying to escape today. Getting lost in the conversation you barely even notice that the Sun has completely gone down and you’ve been sitting around for an hour at your table. Bonnie’s text snaps you out of your little bubble, asking if you’ve been murdered in the sports center or you’re just training for the marathon.

“I should head back to the dorm, I have some studying to do,” you sigh, though you want nothing else than to just stay with Harry.

“I’ll walk you back,” he nods, both of you standing from the seats you’ve been occupying for way longer than customers usually do.

“Oh, no need, I can just—“

“Y/N, I’m not letting you walk back to your dorm in the dark in those clothes,” he cuts you off, but you raise your eyebrows at his words, looking down at your outfit.

“What’s wrong with my outfit?”

“Nothing it’s just… those pants are really… tight,” he breathes out, obviously avoiding to look into your eyes, but you catch him checking out your legs as you step away from the table.

“Well, they better be, it’s the only way body shaping pants can keep everything in place,” you scoff, the two of you heading out of the place.

“Body shaping? Why the hell would you need that?” he grimaces, holding the door open for you. Stepping out you definitely notice that it’s chillier than when you left for your run, but it’s still not that bad, though a nice hot shower will feel amazing when you get back to the dormitory.

“To shape my body, obviously,” you point out.

“You don’t need these, Y/N,” he shakes his head, pinching the fabric on the side of your thigh, along with some of your skin which makes you jump and giggle. “You look amazing either way.”

Wait, what was that? Did he just compliment you? Harry Styles just said that you look amazing with and without body shaping pants? This eerily feels like those daydreams you used to have about him in middle school, though those dreams ended a little more PG rated than how you’d want it now.

“Watch out, Harry. If you keep up with the compliments I might get the wrong idea,” you warn him as completely just a joke, though Harry’s alarm goes off.

He shouldn’t be complimenting you and he definitely shouldn’t be harboring thoughts like the one he has seeing you in those tight pants, but he just simply can’t stop himself. How could he when you hypnotize him with everything you do? At this point he’s convinced you have a spell on him, one that he has no chance of breaking, not that he wants. For the first time in so long he truly feels accepted and happy, in a place where he can be himself without judgment and you created that place for him. He wants to be selfish a little longer and keep this feeling close to his chest.

“There’s no wrong idea,” he whispers under his breath, thinking that you didn’t catch it, but you did. You very much did.

The walk back to your dorm is a bit quieter, you’re hung up on Harry’s comment and Harry is way too deep in his thoughts about you. Walking side by side, you feel like something is slowly shifting between the two of you into a whole new and unknown territory you haven’t touched on when it comes to Harry.

“Thanks for walking me home,” you smile up at him reaching the entrance of your dorm. You turn to face him as he stares up at the building, stuffing his hands into his pockets, a hint of nervousness showing in his features.

“It’s the least,” he smiles back, finally looking at you. Just as you open your mouth to say goodbye, a familiar sound rings from your phone, the notification to an app you’ve been learning your way around with. Not even thinking about the closeness of Harry you pull it out of your pocket and make the mistake of tapping on it, the Tinder logo immediately appearing on your screen as the app loads.

“You’re on Tinder?” Harry asks with wide eyes and your head snaps up to see him staring down at your phone.

“Oh, just… Bonnie made me try it,” you shrug awkwardly as the screen finally loads and Harry spots all the matches you have and a bunch of unread messages.

He can barely control the jealousy that bubbles in his chest. All these men not only find you hot but you also liked their profile enough to swipe right. Who are they? Are you gonna meet them? Are you talking to any of them? Do you like them? God, Harry just wants to snatch your phone out of your grasp to delete every match you’ve made so far and block the app forever. The thought of you with another man outrages and scares him. It can’t happen, no one can lay a finger on you, only him…

“So, um… so you want to date again?” he asks, trying his best to mask his disappointment.

“I-I mean I’m not trying to grow old alone,” you chuckle awkwardly and locking the screen you slip the phone back into your pocket. “I’m meeting with a guy tomorrow for coffee.”

At the mentioning of an already fixed date Harry starts fighting himself, he is so close to tell you that you shouldn’t go out with anyone else but him, that he wants you and can’t stop thinking about you… but he remains silent. Pressing his lips together into a thin line he just nods, taking a step backwards.

“Well, see you around, Y/N,” he sighs and you sense the change in him but it’s also clear he is trying to leave as fast as possible so you don’t keep him up though you wish he did.

“Bye, Harry,” you smile at him before walking up the stairs and getting inside the building.

Harry runs all the way back to the frat house, but not because he wanted to finish his workout, more because he was channeling his frustration through it and he got a lot of that.

No one comments on how long he was away when he gets home. He is dreading after a long shower hoping to clear his head since his run just complicated his thoughts even more, but as he is walking towards his room he finds himself stopping at another one. He knocks gently and waits for it to open as he hears shuffling inside.

“Hey man, what’s up?” Erik smiles at him, the sound of some kind of video game coming from behind him in the room as he steps out into the hallway.

“Can I ask you to do something?” Harry lowers his voice and digging into his pocket he pulls out twenty dollars knowing it will be more than enough to get him to do anything. Erik takes the dollar bills and nods as he folds them and shows them into his pocket.

“Sure.”

“I need you to have a chat with Mitch and just casually drop that you heard from Ruth that his sister is going on a date with a guy from Tinder tomorrow.”

He ignores the alarm in the back of his head though he is definitely not proud of ruining your date using your brother, but the thought of you with someone else is just unbearable. He keeps telling himself that he is doing this for your own sake, though he knows it’s just a terrible excuse for his jealousy.

Erik gives him a puzzled look, but doesn’t question his intentions, just nods and Harry is thankful he is not the nosy type to ask around.

“Got it.”

“Thanks, man,” Harry hums, patting his shoulder before finally heading into his own room. Just as he is closing the door he hears Erik knock on Mitch’s door, inviting him over to play with him and probably to drop the bomb Harry just handed over to him.

Okay, that only happens in movies, but it was nice to play with the thought at least. God, why is it so hard to make friends? Or is something wrong with you? Are you really this awkward? Thinking about it, you’ve known all your friends at home since kindergarten and back then it was enough to just ask someone if they wanted to be friends and boom, then you were friends! But that’s not how it works now and as the days carry on you see everyone finding their circle while you’re left out, slimming your chances to make friends. Because who would want to be friends with the girl who couldn’t get to know anyone for weeks after school started?

Reaching for your phone you look for the contact you really wanted to reserve to the worst case scenario. Calling your brother’s girlfriend to ask if she wants to hang out is not quite how you planned it, but she is your last chance to get out and socialize. Maybe she could introduce you to some people!

“Hey hun! What’s up?” Sarah’s cheerful, chirpy voice rings through the phone as you plop down to the bed, anxiously fidgeting with the fabric of your sweatpants.

“Hi, are you busy?”

“Not at all! Just heading back to my place to get some stuff and spend the night at your brother’s.”

“I was just wondering if, um… if you maybe wanted to hang out? I don’t know, you can totally say no, it’s just that—“

“Y/N, slow down,” she chuckles cutting your rambling off. “Why don’t you come over to Mitch’s too? They are having a few people over, we could catch up and all that, how does that sound?”

“You think he won’t mind?”

“I’ll make sure he doesn’t,” she giggles. “See you there around eight, alright?”

“Thanks Sarah!”

Your brother started dating Sarah freshman year and they’ve been together ever since, now they are seniors and already planning to move in together once they have graduated and they are the cutest ever. Sarah is so great, she made you feel like you’ve been friends forever when you first met her when Mitch brought her home for thanksgiving that first year. She is sweet, open, such a charming person, almost too good for your brother. She could have easily blew you off, why would she want to hang out with a freshman as a senior, but she invited you with them without a second thought. She is your savior.

Sarah said they would have a few people over. That’s what she said, right? Well, this surely doesn’t seem like a chill get together in the frat house where Mitch lives, the music is blasting, the house is packed, and there are red solo cups everywhere you look. You definitely did not expect a full blown frat party.

Walking in you push past a couple that’s quite busy inspecting each other’s throat, you reach for your phone to text Sarah where she is, but you spot her before you could do that, talking to someone in the kitchen with a cup in her hand, her lips painted red that go amazing with her red dress and denim jacket.

“Hey! You’re here!” she exclaims when she spots you approaching her and she pulls you into a hug right away.

“Yeah, but you didn’t tell me it was a whole ass frat party,” you chuckle looking around.

“Ehh, you know how it is, people find out about it and then there’s no stopping after that,” she shrugs, pulling you further into the kitchen. “Want a drink?”

“Oh, yeah I’ll just—“

“Absolutely no alcohol!”

Your brother’s voice beams behind you and a moment later he appears, grabbing the apple juice from the counter to pour some into a cup for you. Great, now you feel like a toddler. At least he didn’t give you a Capri Sun.

Mitch is three years older than you, yet he has always acted like he is your supervisor, the one who needs to know everything about you, especially after your parents got a divorce when you were only ten and you only saw your dad every other weekend. Though he couldn’t be up in your business when he left for college, but he still demanded you had your location on at all times and he would call you randomly, asking where you’ve been and who you’ve been with.

“Oh, come on, babe. She can have at least a beer!” Sarah rolls her eyes at Mitch who shows the cup into your hand.

“Maybe when she is twenty-one,” he scoffs with a hard expression on his face.

“As if you waited until you were twenty-one,” she points out, making you laugh. You know he’s been sneaking around with his friends since he was sixteen, you also remember the first time he came home drunk, you helped him to hide from your mom until he sobered up. Your brother is no saint, but it’s best if he doesn’t know that this wouldn’t be your first time drinking.

“If I see you sneak around and drink, I swear—“

“You what, gonna call mom?” you scoff at your brother.

“Might, yeah!” he huffs, but you both know he won’t.

“Yo! Mitch! Come over here!” someone calls out for him from the living room and he nods their way.

“Stay with Sarah, okay? Don’t want you lingering around on your own,” he tells you before disappearing.

Part of you debate whether you should rebel and split from Sarah, but what would you do on your own? Walk around awkwardly, be a creep in the corner of the room? You’d rather not, so you stick to her like glue as she moves from one person to the other like the true social butterfly that she is.

It’s clear that Sarah is popular and it’s definitely not because she is dating someone from one of the coolest frats. No, your brother has nothing with how people are just drawn towards her, craves to be seen by her, to talk to her. You wonder what it’s like to be like her, to earn the attention without even asking for it…

Harry wasn’t a fan of having yet another party in their house, he would have been happier if it was really just a few people over, playing video games, having a few beers and then call it a night at a reasonable time. But of course, his mates had to go around campus and tell everyone that their door would be open tonight so now here he is, trying to find his will to socialize, but hiding in his room now sounds like perfect.

Sitting outside on the terrace, on the old couch he and the other boys in the house got for dimes, there’s a girl on each of his side, begging for his attention, topping each other with everything they say, not even realizing that he is not too interested in any of them. There was a time when Harry would definitely take up on the task to pick up both girls and bring them up to his room, when he was seeing a different girl every other weekend, but it gets old and tiring. It doesn’t interest him anymore to be the Casanova of the campus, he is done waking up to a different girl whose name he doesn’t even remember, he is done with using girls just as much as they use him. Because he is not stupid, he knows that sleeping with him is like a trophy for some girls, something they can brag about to their friends, make other girls jealous so he never felt like an asshole for using them for his own relief.

Maybe the change came after he started noticing how Mitch, his best mate has been with his girlfriend. How happy he is with Sarah, their little dates, the way they touch and look at each other. At first he thought it was ridiculous and sickening, acting like puppies in love, but the more time he spent with the two of them the more he found himself craving the same thing. Someone to talk to and not just falling into bed after two words, someone to do things with, someone who he could call when he was having a bad day and who’d take care of him. The more he thinks about it the more he wants it, but with who? Most girls don’t think of him as someone they would want to be in a relationship with and they wouldn’t give him the time of the day for more than just a night. Not that he has met anyone he could imagine himself with, so lately he has found himself pulling away from the parties, the drinking and the girls, though it’s hard to change when no one thinks you can. His friends think he’ll be back to his old habits soon and girls still believe they can get him to rock their word for just a night.

“I’m gonna get a refill,” he mumbles, standing from the couch, shaking the hands of the girls off of himself. He ignores as one of them asks to bring her a drink too, mostly because he is not going to get a refill but to hide in his room for a bit, hoping the party will end early, not that it seems possible, everyone is enjoying themselves way too much.

Lying in his bed he is answering some messages and starts scrolling through Instagram only to see most of his friends shit posting about tonight’s party. He notices himself in some of the photos, sporting an unimpressed look in almost all of them and the worst is when he spots himself in the back of a video, a girl behind him curling his hair around her finger without him noticing it. Like a fucking animal in the petting zoo, that’s how he feels like. Growing out his hair was mainly because he knew girls would like it, but then it grew on him more than he thought so now it’s part of his image rather than a tool to get girls.

Groaning he lies flat on the mattress, closing his eyes for a bit, the thumping bass of the music ripping through the house. He wishes it would just stop and the people would disappear.

His room shares a wall with Mitch’s and when he hears the door to his room open and shut, he thinks that someone has ventured into his friend’s room for a hookup which would flip Mitch over for sure. Walking out of his room Harry sees that Mitch’s door is open.

“You guys better not be fucking in here,” he warns whoever is inside, but as he pushes the door further open he only sees one person inside, a girl who jumps and turns around like a scared little deer at his arrival and Harry freezes. “Y/N? Is that… is that you?” he huffs in surprise.

Last time Harry saw you was three years ago. Back then you were just a freshman in high school, looked a lot different, since puberty hit you in your sophomore year, when he was already off to college with your brother who has been his best friend for a decade, being classmates since middle school, all through high school and then going to the same collage.

Harry was always that hot friend of your brother you had a crush on since forever, but for him, you were just Mitch’s little baby sister, who had to be looked after all the time. Harry spent a lot of time at your house, hanging with your brother in the basement and you remember spying on them, trying to always be around them so he might notice you, but looking back at it you see that it was a dead case from the beginning. Harry was popular even in high school, he was on the football team and even dated one of the cool girls for a while. And you? You were years younger than him, had your own circle of friends but you weren’t too popular. The only reason why you weren’t on the bottom of the social pyramid was because Mitch was your brother. Every now and then girls tried to act like they were friends with you just so they could be around Mitch and Harry, but they never really cared about them. They were seniors and you and your friends were freshman, two different worlds.

But that never stopped you to secretly crush on Harry, imagine a day when he would look at you as more than just Mitch’s little sister, that he would take an interest in you. One time you even dreamed about him asking you out to prom, but that was probably the most farfetched idea you had.

You haven’t seen him since he started college, coming home he didn’t spend as much time at your house as he used to, wanting to be around his own family and when summers rolled around you were busy with volunteering so you had something to put on your college application. You saw him once last year from your window when he dropped Mitch off, but you only caught a glimpse of him through the windshield. His hair was getting long, he had several new tattoos on his arm and it all just made him even better-looking than before. Now he is standing right in front of you, his hair longer than ever, the white shirt showing off his inked arm and those tight pants… they should be illegal.

“H-Hi,” you manage to breathe out, already feeling flustered by the way he looks you up and down with no shame.

Harry wonders if it’s just a trick his head is playing with him or it’s really you. The girl he is staring at right now is so different from the one he last saw on the day they moved to campus with Mitch. The awkward little girl with braces is nothing like your version now. You have curves that catch his eyes right away, a beautiful set of teeth without braces, your hair has grown a lot since the last time he was around you… No doubt you’ve grown up and it’s a complete shock for him.

“Wow! I mean… You’re here!” he chuckles before pulling you into a quick hug, but he instantly regrets, because he feels your breasts pushing up against his chest and his hand maps out the curve of your waist, giving him thoughts he definitely shouldn’t be thinking about.

“I am, yeah,” you nod awkwardly, pulling back from him with a dizzy head since you just wrapped your arms around his toned upper body.

“Mitch mentioned that you are studying here as well, but I didn’t know you’d be here tonight.”

“Sarah invited me. I haven’t exactly made many friends since school started so I thought she could, I don’t know, introduce me to a few people,” you admit, but why are you even telling this to Harry? You can’t quite control yourself around him, especially now, when he is looking his best.

“And Mitch let you come here? I’m surprised,” Harry chuckles.

“Sarah made him,” you smile up at him.

“And what are you doing in Mitch’s room? You need anything?”

“Oh, I was just… Well, I lost Sarah and I don’t know anyone else around here, so I thought I would just… have a breather in here.”

Harry nods, folding his arms on his chest as he rubs the corners of his mouth and you need to force yourself not to stare at his biceps. You can only hope he doesn’t notice how nervous you are to be around him again after so long. Part of you believed you were over your crush on him, but seeing him again definitely brought back those feelings you’ve been harboring as long as you’ve known him.

“A-And what are you doing up here?” you ask, clearing your throat, desperate to break the silence that came between the two of you.

“Oh, I was just… not in the mood to socialize,” he admits with a soft chuckle, your eyes widening.

“You? Not in the mood? Is that even possible? I thought you were still the party animal you were in high school,” you tease him, making him laugh and roll his eyes at the same time and you try to ignore how the butterflies in your stomach are going wild at the heavenly sound.

“You’re making me look like a licentious rebel.”

“And you’re not?”

Harry stares back at you smirking, enjoying the bickering way more than he’d admit and he doesn’t want to let go of it just yet. The two of you start talking, catching up about what happened in the past three years, though mostly you’re the one talking.

You tell him about high school, volunteering and all the extra classes you took, prom and graduation… Then he tells you stories about him and Mitch as freshmen, stories you’ve heard from your brother but you let him retell you, because you’d listen to anything he says. It’s probably the most you’ve talked… like ever and though you thought you knew Harry well, you have to realize that you only knew a layer of him, only seeing him with your brother around, being just in the background all the time, but now that it’s just the two of you and you have all of his attention, it’s a whole different experience.

Neither of you realizes how much time has passed, you’re laughing about a time when he almost missed his math midterm because one of their house mates almost burned the house down, you’re cackling as he is telling you about it when the door opens and your brother appears.

“Y/N where the fuck have you been? Sarah has been looking for you!” he snaps, only then realizing that you’re not alone, you and Harry sitting on his bed with legs crossed as you hug a pillow to your chest. “What’s going on here?”

“Hey man, just met your sister! You didn’t tell me she’d be here!” Harry beams happily, but Mitch gives him a suspicious look.

“Why would have I told you?”

“Because I haven’t seen her in ages?”

Clearly Mitch wants to say something else, but he just shakes his head and swallows it before turning to you.

“You’ve been here all along?”

“Yeah, just ran into Harry,” you nod, smiling shyly. Mitch’s gaze shifts from you to Harry, then back to you before nodding to himself.

“Alright, it’s late, I’ll drive you back to the dorm.”

“What? What time is it?” you ask with widened eyes, searching for your phone in your pocket. Checking the screen you see that it’s already one in the morning, meaning that you’ve been in here with Harry for over two hours. “Oh… okay…”

“I can drive her home,” Harry offers, getting up from the bed with you. “I didn’t drink all night.”

“I saw you with a cup in your hands, dude,” Mitch furrows his eyebrows at his friend.

“Didn’t have alcohol in it, wasn’t in the mood,” he shrugs. You can tell Mitch is hesitant, but he doesn’t say anything, just nods at Harry as you both get ready to leave.

There’s a bit of awkward silence in the car, but you don’t know how to break it. Luckily, he is the first one to speak up, the gentle light coming from the dashboard illuminating his amazingly structured face.

“So you haven’t made any friends around here?”

“Well, I do occasionally speak to my roommate,” you tell him, but it sounds even more pathetic saying out loud. “It’s just… it’s been a bit more difficult than I imagined,” you admit deflated. Harry peeks over at you, seeing the bitter look on your face and he has to fight the urge to reach over and give your hand a squeeze.

What’s happening with him? He just spent hours talking to you, he jumps at the chance to drive you home just to spend some more time with you and now he wants to touch and comfort you? He just can’t help it, seeing you for the first time after years was a complete shock to him just as much as how you’ve changed.

“You just have to grab a hang of it. I’m sure you’ll be fine.”

“Yeah, but everyone is already ganging up, I can’t just go up to a bunch of people and ask if they want to be friends,” you scoff chewing on your bottom lip.

“Well, you have more than just one friend, that’s for sure?”

“Do you know about something I don’t?”

“You have your roommate, you have Mitch and Sarah and… you also have me.”

If only you weren’t sitting in a moving car you would have fallen out of your seat. Harry Styles just called himself your friend and you’re almost a hundred percent sure that it wasn’t sarcastic. No, the little smile on his lips definitely proves that he meant it.

“Friends do things together. Does that mean we’re gonna… do things together?” you ask shyly, nervously fidgeting around in your lap with your fingers.

“Sure, why not?” he shrugs like it’s nothing, but your fifteen years old self is screaming and jumping right now. You’ve longed for this moment for so long and now… it really is happening, you’re not just Mitch’s little sister, but one of his friends, an individual. Harry pulls up in front of your dorm and parks the car looking at you with a smile stretched across his face.

“Alright, then here, give me your number so I can reach you and… make plans,” you tell him, handing him your phone with your heart thumping in your chest like crazy. You really are asking for his number, something you never thought would happen, but it is. And it’s so freaking exciting!

He nods and types his number in, saving the contact as just ‘Harry’ before handing it back to you.

“See you around, Y/N,” he tilts his head to the side as you get out of the car.

“Thanks for the ride, Harry,” you smile back, shutting the door and walking up the stairs to the entrance. Looking back you see that he is still watching you, so you wave at him before walking in and disappearing from his sight.

By the time Harry arrives back to the house it seems like the party is dying down. There are way less people and they’ve turned the volume down as well, thank God. Ignoring the girls calling out his name he heads straight up to his room, wanting to just lock himself up there and not have to deal with anyone, but he stops at the door seeing that Mitch is in there, waiting for him, sitting on the edge of his bed.

“Hey man, what’s up?” he asks with a small nod.

“She’s back at the dorm?” he asks, standing up, walking closer to him.

“Yeah, watched her go inside, she is fine.”

Harry steps to his dresser, looking for a fresh set of clothes to wear after his shower as Mitch walks past him towards the door, but before he could disappear, he stops and turns back.

“You know, I hope you’re not thinking about going after my sister.”

“What?” Harry’s head snaps up. Mitch leans against the doorframe, arms crossing over his chest as he stares back at his best friend with eyes Harry has never seen directed at him before.

“It’s just that I saw how you were looking at her, I really don’t want you to bring her into your little games.”

Harry clenches his jaw, Mitch’s words hurt more than he realized. Knowing that his own best friend thinks he hasn’t changed, that it’s all just a game to him still, it’s like a slap across his face. What should he say? Swear to his life that he doesn’t see his sister that way? That he is not the guy he used to be and he doesn’t have to fear his sister?

Harry hasn’t even figured out what seeing you again meant. Because part of him is still stuck on your past self, the one he saw sitting in the car, driving back home with your parents on move in day three years ago, but then there’s this version he saw today, the grown and mature Y/N who is definitely not a little girl anymore and who got his undivided attention tonight without even trying. It was so refreshing to talk to a girl without her wanting to get into his pants as fast as possible. All he knows is that he wants to talk to you again, he wants to see you again, but as he is looking at Mitch right now, he knows that his best friend will take his head if he messes with you, not that he plans to hurt you.

“Don’t worry, Mitch. I know my place,” he mumbles under his breath, his friend nods before walking out and closing his door, leaving him leaning onto his dresser, gripping the edge so tight his knuckles are turning white.

Maybe Mitch is right. Maybe he hasn’t changed and never will. Maybe he was destined to never find someone who could be like Sarah to his friend.

And that thought is more terrifying to him than he’d like to admit.

“Cheeky,” he smirks at you, kissing the tip of your nose before he buries his face into the crook of your neck, grinding his hips against yours, his hard cock slides through your dripping wet lips. He keeps rocking like this, the tip of him pokes at your clit a few times, making you ache for more and even though it’s your birthday, you know he wants to hear you beg for him.

“Harry, please! I need you!”

The magic words: I need you, I want you, please, I beg you. Harry loves when you fall apart for him, beg for him to please you, it’s surely a kink of his even if he doesn’t admit it. Not that you mind, it excites you to see his eyes light up at your words, he always looks ready to devour you.

“Anything for my babygirl,” he growls, kissing you hard as he reaches down, grabs the base of his cock confidently, guiding him into you like he has done it so many times in the past two months.

Yes, it’s been that long since that one weekend at the cabin where your whole world turned upside down and you both confessed to each other how much you desired the other. For a while, you surely thought it was just a fever dream, but when you spent the night at Harry’s two days later because you just couldn’t stay apart any longer, it became reality. You’ve been in a kind of honeymoon daze since then, not able to get enough of each other, practically spending every night together. You had stuff at his place and you also emptied two drawers for him at yours just three weeks into your relationship.

He has been treating you like an absolute princess, spoiling you to death, being the partner you’ve always imagined yourself to be with. You’ve fallen for the man fast and hard, though you haven’t said the words yet, afraid he might get frightened from how deep your feelings for him are rooting.

It’s been a secret between you, him and your mutual friends, Sarah and Mitch. Though it wasn’t your choice to tell them, they wanted to surprise Harry with dinner at his after he claimed to go out of town for business, but in real life he spent the weekend with you in his bedroom. The two of them walked into Harry’s place with the spare keys he gave them a while ago while the two of you were on the couch, completely naked and lost in each other.

It was awkward at first, a lot of sorry and oh shit! mumbled in a hurry and you were afraid of what they would say. You’ve known them for a while yourself, Sarah is a good friend of yours, she was there at you college graduation and you were there at their wedding, you feared what their reaction would be to your relationship with Harry.

Once the awkwardness settled it became clear that they are so glad to see two of their friends happy together.

“You don’t think it’s weird?” you asked anxiously fumbling with the hem of the hoodie you quickly put on. Sarah smiled at you, squeezing your hand sweetly.

“Because of the age? Hun, I always knew you’re a lot more mature than your age and I know Harry treats you right. Nothing else matters.”

It was the relief you’ve been secretly seeking. To get the approval of someone close to you, to think that it’s how everything will go down with your family as well, though that moment hasn’t come yet.

“Let me make my girl feel good on her birthday,” Harry murmurs into your ear, sucking on the soft skin underneath as he pounds into you hard, just how you like it.

“Fuck, Harry!” you moan, your back arching from the way he hits just the right angle with every thrust.

“Cum for me, baby!” he pleads and you pull his head back to look him in the eyes.

“Want to cum with you,” you breathe out panting. Usually, he is the one to tell you when you can cum, but today, he wouldn’t deny anything from you.

“Okay,” he chokes out, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss as he keeps up his steady rhythm.

One of his hands moves down between your sweaty bodies, his thumb starting to circle on your clit and it quickly throws you closer to your release.

“Harry! I’m gonna cum!” you warn him and he picks up his pace so he is as close to his orgasm as you are.

“Come on, baby. Give it to me!” He suffocates your moan with his mouth pressing to yours, his tongue melting together with yours right when you finally reach your high, a moment later he follows you.

He growls at the feeling of your walls tightening around his pulsing cock, emptying himself into you to the last drop, riding his orgasm in sync with yours. He slows his movements down and then comes to a stop, peppering your parted lips with sweet kisses before he lifts his head, staring down at you with a pleased grin on his handsome face.

“Happy twenty-fifth birthday, baby.”

Though you’d love to spend the day in bed with Harry, your birthday is a weekday, a Thursday to be exact, so you both have places to be, but he still cleared his schedule for the morning so he can spend it with you. While you take a shower he makes you breakfast and you eat together before getting ready to leave for the day.

“Do you want me to pick you up tonight?” he offers, turning to face you while he is buttoning his shirt. Sitting on the edge of the bed you’re pulling a pair of tights up your legs before slipping into your black dress.

“Arriving together to my birthday dinner? Won’t that be suspicious?” you ask teasingly as you turn your back to him. He zips up the dress without you even asking for it.

“We could say we came from the same direction,” he shrugs.

Keeping your relationship a secret hasn’t been easy, carrying with you for so long definitely messes with your head, but you both agreed it needs to be revealed at the right time and place with a lot of care and thoughtfulness. While you discussed the opportunity to reveal it tonight at your birthday dinner with your family and friends to which Harry is invited as well, you figured it might not be the best timing, so you agreed to keep the secret a little longer.

“Nice of you, but I have a meeting until six, I’ll barely get to the restaurant on time. Just go on your own, I’ll see you there.”

Turning around you cup his face and kiss him shortly before rushing away to find your shoes.

You have a busy morning at work, having started a new project not long ago, your schedule is full until lunch time. Your favorite coworker, Isha is kind enough to bring you food on her lunch run, so the two of you wind out in your office, having a feast. She is telling you about her romantic weekend with her husband she married just last year when there’s a knock on the door and Willa, the girl from the front desk pokes her head inside.

“Hi, sorry to bother, but this came for you,” she walks in smiling widely, holding a gorgeous bouquet of flowers with a card in the middle of it.

“Oh! Thank you!” you breathe out a little overwhelmed, taking the flowers from her and putting it in a vase on your desk.

“Who is that from?” Isha gasps, curiously eyeing you as you grab the card from it and read the words written inside.

Happy birthday baby. I know we parted just hours ago in the morning, but I can’t wait to see you again tonight. – H xx

A stupid grin stretches across your face as you sigh reading his words. It’s hard to imagine you used to exist next to and so close to each other without being actually together.

“Y/N, are you dating someone and you haven’t told me?” Isha gasps, pretending to be hurt, but you know she is not mad.

“Um, yeah, kinda,” you smile to yourself sitting back into your chair next to her.

“Tell me the details! What is he like?”

“He is… great. The best actually,” you chuckle softly. “A bit older than me though, but it’s working just fine.”

“If he is not some weirdo in his sixties, age doesn’t matter,” she shrugs, making you laugh.

“He is definitely not.”

“How did you guys meet?”

“I’ve known him for a long time. When Emmett and I broke up he ended up being there for me completely randomly and… things just happened,” you shrug shyly, remembering that time in the cabin. It was hard to leave on Sunday, especially since after you both agreed to give it a chance you barely left the bedroom or put on any clothes. It was like one long erotic dream.

“That is so cute, how you found each other after knowing each other for a long time! I’m rooting for you, girl!” she cheers, making you laugh before you move on to something else.

Your day doesn’t slow down in the afternoon either, one meeting follows the other and you keep answering phone calls and texts from friends and family to wish you a happy birthday. When it’s finally six and you’re free from the office you leave in a hurry so you can get to the restaurant on time. Harry texted you about fifteen minutes ago that he was already on his way, so he must be there soon.

Your mom likes to have dinners when your family is celebrating something, inviting the close family and friends for a nice time together. Tonight it’s gonna be your parents, your younger sister Bailey and her girlfriend Sana, your brother Jackson, your mom’s sister Amalie and your two cousins, the twins, Eva and Connor, your mom’s best friend Frida who is like a second aunt to you, her husband Richard and of course, Harry. Usually, this is the core that celebrates together, only the significant others of the younger ones changing from time to time.

Unfortunately, there’s heavy traffic on your way to the dinner, so you’re running a little late. By the time you walk in and the hostess shows you to the table everyone is there.

“So sorry, there was an accident two blocks away and I could barely get past it.”

“Don’t worry, sweetie,” your mom smiles standing up so she can envelope you in a hug. You go around the table, greeting everyone, leaving Harry last.

He stands from the table, pulling you into his arms, squeezing you gently as he hugs you short, not able to have his ways with you just now.

“Hi,” you breathe out with a small smile before letting go of him, taking your seat right across from him. “Alright, now that everyone is here, let’s order—“

“Actually,” your father speaks up. “Not everyone is here.”

You look around, but see no one missing, this is everyone you were expecting tonight, so you give a confused look for your father, until you see the extra chair with the table set there as well.

Just as your dad is about to explain, a tall figure appears at the table, he clearly knows you, but you have no idea who he is. Your dad stands and he pats the stranger’s shoulder, as if they are old friends.

“Y/N, let me introduce you Roman. You remember James Frankel? He came skiing with us a few years ago. Roman is his son, he was supposed to come to that trip as well, but he was… where were you, son?”

“I was finishing up my law degree in London.”

You almost gag at the response, even though he is not speaking like he is full of himself and above everyone, but you’re simply not interested in what he was doing three years ago.

“Uh-huh, sure,” you hum with a forced smile.

“I invited him here tonight, thought you two would have a lot in common,” your dad grins, pushing Roman towards you, who holds out his hand for you.

“Hi, I’m Roman. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” you smile, shaking his hand awkwardly before giving your dad a meaningful look, but he chooses to ignore it as he gestures for Roman to take the empty seat.

Right next to Harry.

It’s so obvious what this is about, your dad had attempts like this before, but you’ve forgotten about it while you were with Emmett. Now as far as he knows you’re single and it seems like he is back at playing cupid.

As the waiter takes your orders and the conversation starts around the table, you peek at Harry, who is sitting next to Roman awfully quietly. Quite clearly, he is not a fan of his presence, but he is not the only one.

“Y/N, Roman used to play volleyball as well,” your dad quips in when you’re having a conversation with Connor.

“Yeah? Fun!”

“Y/N played for ten years, she had to stop when she started college,” your dad explains, but you wish he’d just stop talking.

“It was a long time ago.”

“You couldn’t continue in college?” Roman asks.

“I was too busy and couldn’t fit practice into my schedule,” you shrug, taking a sip from your drink.

“But she still likes to watch games,” your dad tells Roman and you already know where it’s heading.

“Dad—“

“Really? Maybe we could watch a game together sometime!” Roman enthuses.

“I’m sorry, but—“

“That’s an excellent idea!” your dad cuts you off and you clench your jaw how he answers for you, like you’re a child.

Huffing to yourself your eyes hover over Harry, who sits there like it’s pure torture for him. Carefully, you nudge his leg under the table and it makes his eyes snap up at you. Giving him a soft smile you try to tell him how sorry you are and he just shakes his head, knowing it’s not your fault your dad is trying to set you up with someone.

As the evening carries on, it just gets worse and worse. Your dad works so hard to make Roman appealing for you, but you try to dodge every attempt with more or less luck. It’s getting on your nerves and you feel so sorry for Harry who needs to sit this through. At one point he excuses himself and you see him disappear to the terrace of the place. Chewing on your bottom lip you sit and wait before standing up from the table, saying that you need to use the restroom, but then you head after Harry.

“Hey, everything alright?” you ask him, gently squeezing his bicep as you join him.

“Yeah, just… needed some fresh air,” he nods with a weak smile, but you can tell he is lying.

“Harry, I’m sorry about the whole Roman thing. My dad can be so annoying about this.”

“It’s not your fault, you didn’t invite him.”

“I know, but I feel bad that you need to sit it through. Looking around you make sure no one you know is anywhere near before you reach up and cup his face, kissing his lips softly. “It’s weird, but we just have to make it till the end and then we are going home, together.”

“In separate cars,” he mumbles under his breath and you realize why he is so bitter.

“Harry, you know now is not the right time to come clean, we talked about this and you agreed.”

“Yeah, but back then I didn’t know you’d have a date set up for tonight.”

“It’s not a date and you know he has no shots at me,” you smile at him, caressing his cheekbone with your thumb. You can’t miss how he leans into your touch.

“He would be a nice fit for you though.” “No one is a nice fit, except the man I’m dating and that’s you.”

He exhales sharply through his nose, he looks so much younger now, not at all like the confident man you usually see, but this is him too.

“I’m sorry, it’s just hard that I can’t act like I want to when I’m with you.”

“I know, it’s shitty. But we’ll figure it out and it’ll all be in the past soon, okay?”

He nods shyly and leaning down he kisses your lips softly before parting from you. To not make it suspicious, you actually go to the restroom while Harry goes back to the table.

Returning you stop at the bar where Bailey, Sana and Eva are asking for another round of drinks, so you help them out, but then suddenly Roman appears.

“Ladies, can I borrow the birthday girl for a word?”

You plead your sister with your eyes, but she is so oblivious, doesn’t get it at all, the three of them leaving in a hurry, believing they are doing you a favor. When it’s just you and him, he turns to you with a small, knowing smile.

“I have a feeling you are not really a fan of me,” he chuckles softly and suddenly, you feel guilty.

“It’s not that you are not a nice guy, I’m just… not interested.” Roman glances in the direction of the table where your dad is now talking about something with Harry, who is seemingly a little more relieved, your little chat must have eased him.

“Does your dad know that you’re dating his friend?”

“What?” you ask, your stomach dropping to the floor. “H-how do you…”

“Come on, Y/N. I saw the way he looks at you and how he looked at me upon arriving. He was ready to kill me. And I also saw you sneak out to him just minutes ago.”

“Roman, it’s not—“

“You don’t have to explain anything, Y/N. It’s not my business. And if you chose him, he must be treating you right.”

His words touch you, because he must be a gentleman to handle this situation so well. You give him a grateful but also empathic smile.

“I’m sorry, Roman.”

“Don’t be. You’re just doing what’s best for you, I wouldn’t want to mess with that.”

To show him how thankful you really are for the way he is handling it, you pull him into a friendly hug that he returns gladly. The two of you return to the table, your dad watches you curiously, probably wants to know what you talked about, but that he’ll never find out.

At the end of the evening your dad pulls you to the side and you already know what it’s gonna be about.

“So, are you gonna meet him again?”

“Roman? No, don’t think so.” His face falls at your answer.

“What? Why? But he is so nice and I can tell you guys had a good time tonight!”

“Dad, I would appreciate it if you didn’t try to set me up with anyone, alright? I don’t need your assistance.”

“I’m sorry I want to see you happy,” he grumbles under his breath and you roll your eyes at him.

“I am happy!” you argue, but it doesn’t seem like he believes you.

“I just thought that after that bastard Emmett you’d want to meet someone who is… good for you. Roman is such a brilliant young man, what’s the problem with him?”

“There’s no problem, I’m just… not interested.”

An unreadable expression flashes through his face as his lips part before he clears his throat.

“Y/N, you know you can tell us anything…” he then gently says, but you’re not entirely sure what he is talking about.

“Yeah?”

“So if you happened to be seeing someone… a woman maybe, you can…”

“Dad,” you stop him with a chuckle. “I’m not seeing a woman, okay?” You find it sweet that he thinks you’d be afraid to come out, when your sister has done it years ago and you were there, you saw how supportive they were.

“Alright. Okay,” he nods to himself. “Then I’m sorry if I ruined your dinner, Sweetie.”

“You didn’t,” you sigh, pulling him into a hug.

It hurts to lie to him. Or maybe it’s not lying but you’re still not telling him the truth when he’s always just wanted to see you happy and now that you are, you’re not sharing the whole picture with him. But you keep thinking about what he might say or do if he finds out that you’re dating a man fourteen years older than you, who also happens to be one of his best friends.

For a split second, you think about telling him, about not carrying this weight any longer, but you remember that it must be something you do together with Harry, so you talk yourself down.

You bid goodbye to everyone who is still there, thank them for coming and head out to your car. Checking your phone you see that Harry has texted you that he already left and he’ll see you at his place. With an excited smile, you start the car and head after him.

“Hi!” you call out for him upon arriving, locking the door behind you after the Sarah and Mitch incident. He is waiting for you in his living room, he has dimmed the lights so you can see the amazing view of the city through the floor to ceiling windows of his apartment. He is waiting for you with two glasses of wine and oh boy, he is one hell of a sight! He has undone the first few buttons on his shirt, rolled the sleeves up and his suit jacket is lying on the back of the couch. His tattoos are peeking out from under the white fabric and you just can’t wait to tear it all off of him.

“Hey,” he smiles at you shyly. Talking over he hands you one of the glasses.

“You want to get me drunk?” you chuckle, clinking your glass against his.

“Isn’t it what young people do?” he cocks an eyebrow playfully and you swat his chest.

“Stop calling me young as if you were some old bloke.”

“But I am old.”

“Just older than me. You’re not old. Have you seen yourself in the gym?”

“So that’s why you want to come to the gym with me? To stalk me?” he chuckles, taking a sip from his drink.

“I’m just keeping an eye on you,” you chuckle and leaning closer you peck his lips. His free hand comes up to cup your jaw and when you want to pull back he keeps you in place, kissing you again but this time a lot deeper and more passionate. Your toes curl in your heels as his tongue melts against yours, he tastes like wine and mint, he surely had a gum on his way back home.

“So, we still have about two hours left of your birthday,” he hums against your lips, peppering them with tiny kisses.

“I have a few things on my mind that we could do,” you grin seductively and he smirks back at you.

“You little minx. But I owe you something before we do all of those.”

“Owe me something?”

“I haven’t even given you your birthday gift.”

“You did, you sent me those pretty flowers,” you argue as you watch him step away from you. Walking over to the coffee table he places his glass down before grabbing the neatly wrapped little box that’s been lying there and you haven’t even noticed.

“You didn’t think that was all I had planned for you, did you?” he chuckles, maybe a tad bit offended that you actually thought the flowers were his present.

“I’m sorry, I’m not used to being spoiled this much,” you mumble, your cheeks heating up as he walks back to you.

“Well, you better get used to it, because that’s what I’m gonna be doing. Happy birthday.”

He exchanges the box to your wine glass so you have both hands free and you start tearing the silver packaging off excitedly, revealing a flat velvety box that has you gasping.

“Harry, I hope you didn’t spend a fortune on this,” you warn him, though you already know he probably did and he would do it again if he had the chance.

“Just… open it,” he urges you with glistening eyes, a boyish excitement playing in his features.

Dropping the wrapping paper to the couch next to you, you pop the lid of the box open and reveal a gorgeous diamond necklace, the kind every girl dreams of once owning.

“Harry…” you breathe out, running a finger gently over the several little diamonds that make up the plated necklace, they are shining bright as the light hits them.

“Do you like it?” he asks shyly.

“Are you crazy? I love it! But I don’t want you to spend so much on me!” you sigh, but you’re still so touched he gifted you with such a beautiful thing, especially because you just know he picked it himself. He is not the kind to get his assistant to buy gifts in his name, so it makes it even more special. “Help me put it on?”

Nodding he places your glass to the table beside his and as you turn around he takes the necklace from the box and wraps it around your neck, clasping it securely at the back, his fingers delicately brushing over the skin on the back of your neck before he places a soft kiss to it as well.

“Nothing can stop me from spending money on the woman I love.”

Your eyes widen at his words and you turn around so fast you almost lose balance, but his hands grab your waist to steady you on your feet. You see the blush on his cheeks as he stares back at you, while you feel your heart hammering in your chest at his confession.

“You love me?” you breathe out, your hands coming up to cup his face in your palms.

“I do. Does it… scare you?” He nervously fidgets with the fabric of your dress on your waist as he tries to read your expression that’s a mixture of shock and pure happiness.

“Say it, please” you plea, pressing yourself up against his chest.

“I love you, Y/N,” he breathes out, his green irises practically burning into your gaze. Biting your bottom lip to contain your growing grin, you push yourself up to your tiptoes, your noses brushing against each other as you speak up.

“I love you too, Harry.”

Your lips press against his and you can feel his relief over your words, but how silly it was of him to think you wouldn’t require his love when you’ve been dreading to say it to him for weeks now.

“Are we gonna spend the remaining time of my birthday wisely, Mr. Styles?” you grin against his lips, his hands moving up your thighs under your dress, his fingers digging into your flesh as he nibbles on your jawline.

“What do you have in mind?” he hums.

“Would you like to see me in my birthday gift?”

He pulls back, a confused look on his face since the necklace is already on you.

“I mean… only in it,” you correct yourself, his face lights up immediately as he scans over your body with a hungry look.

“Maybe the heels could stay too,” he suggests and you grin at him satisfied with his reaction.

“Yeah, that too.”

You can barely finish your sentence, he picks you up easily and rushes towards the bedroom, your giggles echoing in the apartment until they turn into moans and screams of his name.

To make up for the fact that you couldn’t really celebrate your birthday as a real couple, it was Harry’s idea to have dinner with Sarah and Mitch on Saturday, since they are the only ones who know about your romance. Of course, except Roman, who saw it right away on Thursday, but he vowed not to say a word to anyone.

You spend most of Saturday morning with Isha, going to the nail salon and for a small shopping spree since next weekend is gonna be her and her husband’s wedding anniversary. When she asked if you’d be up for a girl’s day you were so excited about it. A lot of your friends were from college, which you attended with Emmett and following the breakup, most of them, for some unknown reason took his side. You bet he shit talked about you nonstop and that’s how he got them to turn their back to you, but if they are so gullible, it’s not even a loss for you. You’re doing more than okay with Isha, who has grown to be such a good friend of yours lately.

Harry is forced to take care of some work in the morning, so after a quick breakfast at yours, where you sent the night, you part ways. You’re having a blast, gossiping all morning while getting your nails done, talking about all your colleagues you both hate. Then comes the shopping spree and in the middle, you settle for a little diner to grab lunch. While waiting for the food you text Harry back, he updated you just about an hour ago that he was done at the office so he’s heading home.

“Are you still not gonna tell me more about your mysterious man?” Isha wiggles her eyebrows at you over the table.

“What do you want to know?” you chuckle softly, placing your phone down to the table.

“You could start with telling me his name.”

“It’s Harry.”

“Oh, nice. Do you have a picture with him?”

Do you? Oh, of course you do. You have plenty in your gallery, photos only you and him have seen, no one else before. You hesitate, whether it’s a good idea to show her one, but you’re already planning on coming clean to your family too, telling Isha more about Harry won’t hurt.

Grabbing the phone you open the gallery and look for your favorite picture of the two of you. It was taken in his spacious closet on an evening you were spending the night at his. You were wearing one of his shirts and a pair of shorts while he only had a pair of grey sweatpants on, holding you in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist as you took the picture in his huge mirror. It’s so simple and domestic, you just love the vibe you always get from looking at it.

You show the screen to Isha who gasps right away seeing the photo.

“Oh my God! He is so hot!”

“Yeah, he is,” you chuckle shyly.

“And you guys look so good together! Okay, I’m obsessed!” she cheers and demands to see more, so you swipe a few to show her a few other photos together. “What does he do?”

“Don’t ask me that, because I’m not entirely sure,” you chuckle. “But he took over the business my dad used to lead.

“Oh, so he knows your dad!”

“Well,” you frown a little. “Truth is they are… kind of best friends.”

“Then they get along pretty well, what’s wrong with that?”

“Dad doesn’t really know that we are dating.”

“Oh…” she breathes out, understanding the situation. “Are you planning to tell him?”

“Yeah, of course. It’s just hard to find the right time, you know? I have no idea how he’ll react and I don’t want this to ruin their friendship or my relationship with my dad. It’s such a shitty situation.”

It feels so liberating to finally share your thoughts with someone, you haven’t been able to do that and you only now realizing how it’s been eating you away.

“He might get upset at first, but I’m sure he loves you both enough to settle and just be happy for you.”

“I’m hoping that’s what’s gonna happen, too,” you sigh. It would break your heart to see any of them unhappy because of something related to you. They’ve been such good friends, if your dad cut Harry out it would be so devastating for him and you don’t even want to imagine a version where your father stops talking to you because of Harry. You can only hope for the best.

“You really love him, don’t you?” Isha asks with a soft look. Your gaze snaps up to meet hers and you feel your throat tighten as you nod.

“Yeah. I really do.”

“I can tell that.”

“I mean…” you breathe out shakily. “It’s gotten to the point that if he asked me to marry him now, I would do it without a second thought and we’ve only been together for two months,” you confess and you can tell Isha is surprised by your honesty. “I know, it’s crazy,” you chuckle bitterly, wiping a tear away that escaped the corner of your eye.

“No, it’s not,” she shakes her head. “I mean, I knew Flynn was the one for me probably after the third date, so it’s definitely not crazy.”

“I just always thought I’m the kind who’d think a marriage through so deeply and only tie the knot if we’ve been together for years and I still feel the same, but with Harry… I just know that I want to be with him for the rest of my life. I can’t explain it, but I just know.”

“You don’t have to explain how you feel, it’s enough that you know what it means,” she tells you, her hand finding yours over the table as she squeezes it gently.

“Thanks,” you chuckle lightly. “I was starting to think I lost my mind.”

“You can always come to me when you want someone to tell you you’re not crazy,” she chuckles, making you laugh too.

You feel relaxed and refreshed by the time you get home to get ready for dinner. It excites you that you and Harry will be out and about like a normal couple, having dinner with friends without having to pretend like you are just old friends when you share a bed almost every night. You chose a place with special care, where you know your parents or their friends would never appear so you can have a peaceful time together.

You put on a tight red dress that you’ve been dying to wear somewhere, but you just never had the occasion. Harry arrives a little earlier than you expected, so you tell him to come up and wait for you while you finish with your hair. Leaving the door open you rush back into the bathroom to keep curling your hair in loose locks to top your look.

“Hiya!” he calls out, walking into the small apartment.

“Bathroom!”

You hear his footsteps get closer and closer until he appears in your sight, wearing a navy blue suit with his usual crispy white shirt underneath and when he sees you, his lips part, his eyes trailing down your body with so much hunger and lust in them, it turns you on a bit too.

“Wow,” he breathes out in awe as you finish the last curl and put the curling iron aside to cool, stepping out of the bathroom.

“You like it?”

“I fucking love it,” he chuckles, his hands find your waist and he pulls you to him, kissing your lips sweetly. “Can’t wait to see you out of it though,” he adds cheekily and you just wink at him, rushing off to put on your heels.

When you get into his car and he starts driving, his hand instantly moving to your thigh as the other one lazily holds the wheel. You grab the one on your thigh and lace your fingers together, bringing it up to your lips to kiss his knuckles. He peeks at you smiling and your heart skips a beat as your conversation with Isha replays in your head from earlier today.

There’s no doubt you’d marry this man in an instant, he is the one for you. And you’ll do anything and everything to keep him by your side for as long as you can.

Sarah and Mitch are always great company and it’s a relief you and Harry share some friends. He obviously runs in different circles than you, so it’s nice to find common things and people.

The restaurant you chose is one of the high end ones, but because of the general aesthetic of the place, it’s more popular between younger crowds, ruling out the chance to run into your parents or someone they know. It’s so thrilling to walk into a place holding hands with Harry, have him kiss whenever he pleases and his hand ends up on your thigh under the table as well, but you don’t have to hide it this time.

The evening is going amazing, you’re having a great time. It’s got you thinking that this could be your everyday if you came clear, no worries, no stress, just being with the man you love the way you want. It strengthens your thought that you need to make it become your reality as soon as possible.

However it seems like your luck does not last until the end of the evening. The start of the downfall is when you spot a familiar face, a so called friend you shared with Emmett who hasn’t talked to you since the breakup. You and Vivian were good friends through college and though after graduation you couldn’t keep in touch as frequently as you wished, you still considered her as a close friend. It all turned into dust when she stopped answering your texts and calls after the weekend you broke up with Emmett. You have no idea what he told her to make her take his side, but you didn’t even bother to search for answers because in all honesty, you didn’t care anymore. Anyone who takes Emmett’s side over yours should not be in your life in any way.

You’re already waiting on dessert when Vivian walks in with two other girls you recognize from school but you never really knew them. She is laughing, linking her arm together with one of the girls as they are walked to their table not too far from yours and your throat goes dry when her eyes meet yours. The smile vanishes from her face and disgust fills her eyes as she stares back at you. Her gaze moves over to Harry next to you, then back to you and contempt is dripping from her look.

You don’t understand it. It seems like she knows who Harry is but she never met him, what is going on?

“Everything alright?” Harry’s hand squeezes your thigh under the table, grabbing your attention from Vivian. You turn to him with a forced smile, nodding.

“Yeah, of course,” you mumble.

You try your best to ignore her, but she just falls right into your vision, it’s almost impossible not to look at her every now and then. Especially because she’s not trying to hide her stares thrown in your way.

When you see her get up and head to the restroom, you just know you have to go after her. Your table is mostly done with eating so you excuse yourself and go after her, your heart beating up in your throat.

As you push the door open to the ladies’ restroom you stop in your track when you see that she is standing right there, arms folded over her chest, waiting for you.

“You really got the nerve, parading out in public with your sugardaddy, huh?” she snickers and it feels like a punch in your stomach.

“Viv, what are you talking about?” She lets out a vicious laugh, shaking her head at you.

“How you betrayed Emmett. That’s what I’m talking about.”

“I betrayed him? This has got to be a joke,” you scoff.

“Don’t stress yourself, he told us everything. But you’ve got a thick skin to be out and about with the man you cheated on him with.”

Your mouth almost hangs open. Emmett is going around, telling everyone you cheated on him with Harry? Is he out of his fucking mind?

“And you believed him without even asking me about it? I thought we were friends, Viv.”

“Friends don’t treat others the way you did.”

“I never cheated on Emmett. And it’s pathetic that he goes around, talking shit about me because he can’t accept that I dumped him for being an immature, ignorant ass,” you snap back, needing to defend yourself and your reputation even if you’ll probably never be friends with the people that turned against you.

“Funny, so why were you with him at your dad’s cabin that weekend? Emmett told me all about how he found you with him there when you were supposed to spend the weekend together. How old is he by the way? Are you really that desperate to be with someone that you jump at the first man that walks into the room? Did you turn into one of those leeches that live on older men’s money?”

At this point, you can’t help but laugh. This cannot be happening, right?

“I’m actually surprised you believe every damn word that leaves his mouth, Vivian. I thought you were smarter than this. I would say I’m hurt by how badly you don’t trust me, but honestly… it doesn’t deserve the energy. I hope you’ll enjoy kissing Emmett’s lying ass in the future. And for the record, Emmett is just a ridiculous excuse of a man. He could never be the man Harry is.”

Before she could react to anything you said, you turn around and walk out, chest heaving and your hands are shaking. Returning to the table you try to play it off, but you can’t fool Harry.

“Y/N?” he whispers quietly, but you just shake your head.

“Later,” you mumble and plaster a fake smile onto your face for the rest of the dinner.

Soon enough, you get ready to leave and you can’t help yourself from peeking in Vivian’s way. She is staring at you with a hard expression and when Harry’s hand moves to your lower back, you swear you see a grimace on her face before she turns back to her plate.

Saying goodbye to Sarah and Mitch, you go back to Harry’s car and head home finally. The ride back to his place is quiet, you know he is dying to ask about what happened, but he is giving you time to come out with it whenever you feel comfortable talking about it.

Walking into his apartment you take a deep breath, plopping down to the couch and he follows you with a worrisome look on his handsome face, trying to figure out what’s going on. As he sits beside you, you turn to face him.

“There was a girl at the restaurant, we used to be friends,” you start and he listens carefully, giving you his undivided attention. “She stopped talking to me after Emmett and I broke up, but I never knew why. I talked to her at the restroom tonight,” you sigh, sinking into the soft cushion of the couch. You can still hear Vivian’s words in your head crystal clear, how she called you a leech and a cheater.

“What did she say?” Harry asks, a hand reaching out to gently cup the back of your neck, his fingers softly massaging you in hopes it eases your stress. There was some hardness in his words, but it’s all because he is so protective over you.

“It turns out that Emmett told everyone we broke up because… I cheated on him with you. And that I went to the cabin with you instead of being with him that weekend and he found us. How messed up is that?” you ask rhetorically with a bitter chuckle, rubbing your face with your hands. Harry’s fingers stop for a moment and you can tell he is trying to hold himself back from an outburst.

He has expressed his dislike towards Emmett quite a few times. Admitted that he really wanted to punch him in the face when he came after you that day, but didn’t want to look like an animal, though you would have enjoyed seeing Harry beat him up. Now, after two months, he still manages to piss you off and at this point you’re convinced it’s a special talent of his.

“You think he told that to every friend you shared?” he asks softly. You didn’t talk out much about losing friends though, but he could tell a lot changed after the breakup. Even though you weren’t together for a long time, you were in the same circle of friends and suddenly, you were all alone, you couldn’t hide that from Harry.

“Most likely,” you nod, feeling your throat closing up. “She said some nasty things, I can’t believe we used to be friends. I always knew she could be mean, but I never thought she would target me one day. She said I’m ballsy to parade with my sugardaddy after I cheated on Emmett. So disgusting.”

Harry’s jaw clenches at the name Vivian addressed him. It’s a stab in a wound he’s been trying to cover up for a while. Though you never had a second thought about the age difference between the two of you, he couldn’t stop wondering what others might think, how they perceive the two of you from the outside. He definitely doesn’t look his age, but it’s clear he is quite older, especially because you look so young, so fresh, always dressed pretty, you could easily make anyone believe you’ve just turned twenty. People don’t know how mature and grown you are, way ahead of your peers. Until now, this fear only existed in his head, but hearing someone point out the obvious hurt him.

Though he stopped speaking up about his worry regarding the age gap between the two of you, it was clear to you that he never really moved past it. So when you see him get a little too lost in his head, you know you have to step in.

“H, look at me.”

Taking his face in your hands you scoot closer to him on the couch. Running your thumb across his cheekbone you pull him in for a short, sweet kiss.

“What she said was bullshit, alright? No one thinks you’re my sugardaddy or anything degrading, okay?”

“You can’t know that for sure,” he sighs in defeat.

“But I do. Also, who cares what strangers think? We know the truth and look at Sarah and Mitch! They support us so I’m sure our friends and family will do the same when we tell them, alright?”

Harry stares back at you in total awe. Even after such a horrible encounter with Vivian, you still have the strength to take care of him. He truly thinks he doesn’t deserve you, such a young and beautiful soul and you chose him? There’s got to be a trick somewhere.

“Don’t worry about it. Why don’t we go over to my parents’ place next weekend and have a talk with them, hm?” you suggest.

“We really need to think through what to tell them.”

“We will,” you chuckle, running a hand through his curls you pull him down again, your lips meeting in a longer and deeper kiss, his hands finding your waist before he guides you to sit on his lap, straddling him. “Now, you said something earlier about seeing me take this dress off,” you smirk against his lips, the mood changing instantly when he catches on what you’re implying. His hands slide up to your bum under the dress and he makes you grind against him, a gaps slipping through your wet lips.

“You little minx,” he chuckles, but pulls you in anyways, throwing you to the couch to get on top of you.

While it felt like this was the end of the downfall, you couldn’t know that this was just the beginning. It never occurred to you that running into Vivian would cause you harm other than the conversation you had with her. You didn’t think her seeing you with Harry would be a problem, because she never really knew your dad or anyone in your family to be honest. But what you didn’t notice is that she took a picture of the two of you upon walking out of the restaurant, both your and Harry’s face clearly recognizable as he had an arm curled around your waist, not in a friendly way.

That picture ended up sent in a message to Emmett before you even reached Harry’s car. When he opened it and saw you with Harry, he saw red.

Back at the cabin he didn’t quite put the picture together, he was too mad to think about why Harry was so familiar to him. But when his anger settled and he went through everything that happened, he realized why he thought he’d seen the man who sent him away. Emmett and Harry met at a few family gatherings and he remembered him to be one of your dad’s close friends. Though he couldn’t know what happened between you and Harry that weekend, he didn’t quite like the fact that you were there with him. That’s when he made up the story about you cheating on him with Harry.

But now as he stared at the photo evidence, that proved he wasn’t that far from the truth, though no cheating was involved on your side, he couldn’t help but feel… betrayed. His ego could barely take the hit that you broke up with him, but finding out that you’ve already moved on and did that with Harry… it didn’t sit well with him.

Being the immature and petty bastard that he was, a plan was born in a matter of seconds, a way of getting back to you for daring to leave him. He knew you enough to figure out you weren’t quite public with Harry, because he saw pictures of your birthday dinner with your family and the two of you looked nothing like a couple, so it gave him an excellent idea for revenge.

He saved the photos, went on with his life and first thing in the morning, when you were still sound asleep in Harry’s arms in his bed, Emmett printed the pictures out, slid them into an envelope, wrote your parents’ address on it and in an old fashioned way, he simply mailed the photos to them.