Flipflopeater

Sailing the seven seas is all fun and games until the eight one appears

Flyyyyyyyyy hiiiiiigghhh, freeeeeee biiird yeah! *banjo plays*

Ive deployed multiple spies in your area, be advised. Your mom? Might be a spy. Your dog? Might be a spy. The russian guy whos always sneakily following you and watching from the shadows? Might be a spy....

I want to say something stupid today but my neck hurts too much

I am going to blow everyone up. I am in a state of rage. My anger is equal to that of a god. Who shall stop me?

I had the weirdest dream. So like i kissed a random girl in my class (that i dont even like???) But it wasnt like a normal kiss. She was like "open your mouth a bit" and i thought to myself "why do i need to open my mouth" and then she kissed me but it was like an uncomfortable open mouth kiss (the way you french kiss without the tongue i guess). So that was weird. You can go on with your day now. You are allowed to forget this now. Bye.

What would you do if the davinci twins broke into your house and davinci'd your vinci

The existence of Tom Holland implies the existence of Tim Belgium and that scares me.

Do you ever just wanna ARF ARF ARF WOOF ARF ARF ARF

Dude what if we invent like a movie that is scary. Like its a movie, but instead of laugh and cry, you just scream and bawl your eyes out. Yeah, thats neat.

Dont you hate it when you hate it and you cant stop hating it.

Just drank 0% cocktail. Its gross. Its bitter. I still hate alchohol. How do people drink this. Yuck. Big yuck. Down the drain it goes.