descent to the abyss

btw it's so fucking stupid you can be anxious physically in your body even after you've decided mentally you don't care. I'm supposed to be in charge here

in a large sense scarcity is a necessity for true happiness as it gives the human the ability to savor, to find beauty, meaning, etc. If my every desire is met then what is the point of living? I am thankful when I do not receive what I want, only so that I can sink deeply into presence when I do. I think that we must allow suffering to find us, we must sometimes accept lack, and know that it's all part of the rhythm too.

i love you archival work. i love you alphabetizing. i love you sorting. i love you reshelving. i love you document restoration. i love you shelf reading. i love you inventorying. i love you analysis. i love you archival work.