What Is Real?

I was thinking the same thing, it was all very dreamlike to be there. I am glad I did, though! I have never been to Canada.

It does! And while it does I am curious as to what made it surreal for you.

That’s awesome, bro, that you got to go to a place and enjoy it so much. Think you’ll ever go back?

Mmmmmmmmmmhm, you’re reeeeeeally not sure? Alright, I’ll keep ya’ guessing. Let’s just say it’ll be a pretty easy job to get it to stay around.

Sick of you? Never! I will add to this discussion and ask to go see it tomorrow night, maybe? I’m always down to be the arm candy to someone so handsome.

Hold up... maybe I’ve got it... I think that....... nope, I don’t know. Can’t figure it out. Pretty easy job? So in other words... food, it has to do with food? Maybe?

Nah they’re oddly find with that sort of thing. The state I was in a few months back… you won’t scare them. Come round any time you like.

That just sounds messed up, and honestly, no kid should be fine with that kind of thing, but... I’d like to see you guys so, if it’s good, I’ll stop by in the next couple of days.

Okay. As long as you have somewhere you can just relax for a little while. Maybe I’ll actually get to see you? 

I think I do. Yes, you’ll actually get to see me, and that’s a promise. You’re kinda really fuckin stuck with me.

Smiley days in Scotland! Don’t ask, just accept and let the contagion spread ‘cause I’m sure everyone can use one every once in a while. I know I’ve been hard-pressed to find one the past while, but things are looking up.

With that being said, I’m back in Edinburgh safe and sound. I’ve spent a lot of time bouncing from here to Los Angeles for some much needed family time and have definitely fallen off the radar, but I’m stuck like glue now! Can a girl get some socializing on and get back to some regularly scheduled normalcy? Thaaaaaaaaanks.

I have no idea what is bringing the smiles and all, but it looks good on you. Keep it up. I insist. If they don’t stay, then I’ll just have to find a way to make the smiles stay.

I do have to say that Canada has certainly been leaving a wonderful impression thus far. I was lucky enough to be invited to a Canadian colleague’s Thanksgiving dinner at his cottage in British Columbia, and it has been nothing but a stunning experience. Consider me swayed, North America.

Has anyone else found themselves in a place that seems almost surreal?

It looks like you’re living the dream, bro. That shit looks straight out of a painting, or something.

It was hard to watch Finn shoulder the entire responsibility of what it was he had done. He was asked to do things, forced to considering the role he had to play despite the discomfort it may have brought, and he genuinely thought it was his own problem. He had been in it for a while, that much had been clear without him having to tell Eve exactly how long he had been dealing with orders, and expectations, and just things that a regular day-to-day person shouldn’t have had to worry about. As sad as Eve was, as confused and as muddled as her thoughts were about the entire situation, there was also something blaringly obvious in her mind that she didn’t have any hesitation in accepting.

“No.” It was a simple word, easy to say all things considered. Eve’s hand clutched at nothing when Finn retracted his touch, eventually curling into fists that gripped the bottom of the top she was wearing and she shook her head. “No, I don’t want you to go, and I don’t want you thinking that because it was just you in this that it has to be just you to figure it all out.” It was a lot, Eve would admit that, it was a lot to wrap her head around and grasp, a lot to manage and see where she fit into it all, but she’d be damned if she didn’t at least try. Why? It was a valid question, why would she bother? It was simple, really, but she was sure of it as she, despite the heaviness in her chest making it difficult, sent a smile in Finn’s direction. The small space in between them on the couch was closed, knees bumping and thighs touching when she reached out again to take Finn’s hand this time. Eve needed him to know that it didn’t need to be him on his own anymore, that she was more than ready and more than willing to take some of the weight he had on his shoulders and help him dispose of it. 

“Where do we go from here? What can I do to help you?”

Her response took a moment to register with him. Finn wasn’t sure if this was because he’d taken a good beating, or if it was because he felt like maybe he was dreaming and didn’t deserve it. Whatever the reason, what she said took a moment before it pierced through him and he realized the weight of what she was saying to him. Eve was telling him that she wasn’t going to leave him to handle all of this alone. She wasn’t turning her back on him despite what he’d done to her, and despite what he had done in general. He was acutely aware of the fact that he didn’t deserve it, for her to stand by his side in this moment, but he couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief.

When her hand reached for his, whatever last bit of tension in his body that had remained completely evaporated. Finn swallowed hard as he considered the answers to her questions, looking at their hands clasped together. “Well... for starters, I need somewhere to stay. I don’t have my apartment in Chicago, and even if I did I couldn’t go back now. I don’t want to go back. And... since you’re not telling me to go, honestly, I’m not too proud to say that I just want to be with you. You have this way of making me feel like it’s all going to be fine. You make me forget all the other shit.”

His eyes lifted to her face. “I’ll start looking at options for a job. I have an idea, but I’d have to get in touch with my friend in LA, see if it’s something he can help me with. I’ll figure something out. Once I know where I can get a job, I’ll find a place to live. Just... I don’t want to impose on your space. I have friends who could help me with a place to stay.”

Anyone who knows you could have told you that was a mistake. Honesty being your thing and all that. I really hope you do take some time for yourself though. 

You’re probably right about that but hey... I had to give it a shot. I would’ve spend my whole life wondering about it if I didn’t give it a go. I didn’t want to regret not taking an opportunity. Now I know, and in the end I won’t live wondering what if. I’m taking a little time, don’t worry. If you’re up for it, when I’ve healed up a little more so that I won’t scare your kids, I’d like to come and spend a little time with all of you.

You know I have a spare room, right? I did tell you if you ever needed to get away you could use it.

I know, and thank you. I promise I’ll let you know if I need the room. I think right now, I’ll be okay. Eve isn’t likely to give me the boot just yet. I’m a lucky man.