ALL YOU CAN EAT

Imagine if a like 8 foot tall guy that looked kinda like an alien species just kinda showed up at the house you rent a room in and crashed on the couch and at first everyone hated him but you kinda just accepted this weird massive kinda-human alien species thing as a part of your group even though he's like twice the size of everyone else there

Cuz that's literally happening to sea lions in San Francisco right now

Lessons from the 90s that children today need

your lack of ritual consciousness has caused billions of microcurses to accumulate in your energetic biome

Oh fuck dude, you smoked that weed? That's the forever weed. The weed that makes you high forever. Hope you're having a good time because it's permanent. Also I hope it's okay, but I just invited 100 people over, and if they find out you're high you're FUCKED.

hi im your cat do you mind if i touch your coffee. do you mind if i put my whole foot in your coffee

oingo boingo sounds like if someone made an 80s song as a threat

queue up any given oingo boingo song and imagine the singer has a gun to your head

THEY LOOK SO CUTE HERE!!

Ok I think this might be funnier with context actually. This is a review for a strip club in Toronto.