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@fiendingforalover
Havent updated this blog in a second but i wanted to make a pinned post linking to the fic so here is the fic
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
I'm a slow writer but i am still working on it! It's been fun. :o)
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((heyy you asked earlier just wanted to confirm that I'm 22 haha))
so unbelievably obsessed with this AU. I wanna ask - do you have a resolution to this AU in mind? Does karkat ever escape?
and just bc I love her, is feferi dead by this point in the au?
thank you! sorry i just wanted to be sure. So. I think the resolution i want is that gamzee and karkat runaway together as fugitives in the end which feels really self indulgent lmao but what's fanfic if not weird and self indulgent. Gamzee takes Karkat prisoner and there's a lot of dubiously consensual stuff bc of that but then they fall in love and upend the system a little bit on the way out. I used to talk about this au leaning more into the Bodice Ripper vibe so 🤷♂️ take that as you will.
And as for feferi, she's alive, just because it's more interesting for her to be around still (and i also like her). Like at this point it's been a couple sweeps since their ascension and condy still hasn't seen her dead so it would make things very fraught politically, even if she's put out statements and propaganda about how fef is tooootally dead and business can go on an usual. GHB would know though, and seeing her sweat would be fun for him.
Tavros prisoner au paragraph I talked about a little ago. like I said i think it came out nice.
--
Recycled air rattled through old vents, the stale taste of it coating Tavros’s tongue. Hundreds of beasts fidgeted uncomfortably in their cages, crowded together, their sweat and waste only contributing to the unpleasant smell. He slopped more steroid filled feed into the troughs—the one thing he knew they looked forward to— and scratched the head of one of the creatures as it ate ferociously, fighting the beasts next it for it’s share. It barely acknowledged his existence, appendages flicking away the small bugs that had managed to proliferate on the ship, bypassing the ancient filtering systems and attempts at pest control, generations inbreeding comfortably in the obscure corners of the ship. Milky eyes stared wall eyed into the dark unknowing of the vast universe beyond, or even the planet they had come from. He himself hadn’t stepped foot on solid land since his ascension, though he wouldn’t be here much longer. He was moving up, as much as someone of his caste could. The Circus was in need of a new animal handler. It wasn’t something he was looking forward to, really, but least he wouldn’t have to work the slaughter blocks anymore.
Karkat had been denied everything because of his blood. His own mutant biology stunting his growth, with no status, no lineage, no place in the world. Everything he couldn't have, Gamzee had in abundance. He'd long since put away the childish notion that if he'd just strived enough, worked hard enough, he couldn't be ignored. They'd have to recognize his worth. Might made right, after all. The sight of it disgusted him. It was everything he'd ever wanted.
I have a headache and i keep going over the same scenes in my head for this au almost every night i just dont know how to get them down right. Karkat having thoughts about gamzee having what he strived for, young and quickly climbing up the ladder but he seems disinterested in his position. The physical strength to him, the sharp claws and teeth and the prestige of working under someone like the grand highblood. Gamzee telling karkat he thinks ghb is scared of him and karkat scoffing at the idea. Something about power.
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one of my favorite things to think about with karkat is his relationship to his own mutation. like. in my prisoner au, karkat has few scars, especially for a troll on the run. the care he takes to not get hurt and bleed, and the skill to not get injured in the fights he can't avoid. Disgusted and resentful of his own blood and biology, but still with such a strong will to live. in contrast to gamzee, who has so, so many scars. Nearly indestructible, viewing his body as a tool more then anything else, flagellant in a way. Self destructive with a self image that swings wildly from high to low and back again. hmhmhmm.
Im probably not looking hard enough but have you published anything chapter wise and where would I read it? 😂 I just recently found ur art and AU and I just gotta say I’m IN LOVE!!
oh idk if i ever posted it here lmao. maybe i thought really hard about doing it then never actually posted about it, but i posted it to ao3!! i am still sort of proud i think i did an ok job for it being the first real writing i've done for myself.
thinking about karkat meeting karako in this au. the fact that such an obvious runt purple is still taller then him is almost funny. the way he tries to communicate, honking and waving his hands and a building pressure in karkat's chest, his eyes feeling like they're gonna pop. the way he backs off when he realizes his excitement is hurting karkat, the pressure replaced with a quiet fizz and a feeling like he's sorry, he didn't mean to. usually he has to try harder with non purples.
gamzee being surprised karkat knows how to read and write, karkat asks how he thinks he survived this long with out knowing. Gamzee says he doesn't know how karkat wasn't culled in the caves.
It's awesome that you're getting back into the swing of working on this au! anything specifically get you back into it or was it just a little thought that reminded you to get back on it?
oh nothing in particular, i've wanted to work on it bc i was working on a third chapter that wasnt coming out good and then i kinda got burnt out on drawing and making stuff in general i think. i'm doing kinktober to try and get back into drawing a little everyday and it's been nice and getting those creative juices made me wanna write too.
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Long time no post but I've been working on this au again writing stuff and i was thinking about a scene where gamzee takes karkat to training where he ends up sparring with other clowns and sort of ends up getting thrashed and pulled out. Karkat makes fun of him for it bc why wouldn't he and gamzee offers to spar him as well. I can't decide what happens when they do, either gamzee pins him in a somewhat shocking show of skill compared to his earlier performance or karkat wins but feels like maybe gamzee lost on purpose. Something about how what looks like a lack of intelligence or skill in gamzee is really just a lack of motivation.
wow this is so fucked. you are so fucked. I'm enamored and I will continue reading
Thank you, i try my best!!
in your prisoner au what would you say first attracted gamzee to karkat and vice versa?
it's a lot of little things i think. forgive me i'm gonna ramble incoherently about my au for a bit.
In the first chapter i posted it's pretty obvious that gamzee is immediately fascinated by karkats blood and mutant physiology. It's not all sexual (but it is a Little Bit bc he's a freak). It's also in how karkat snaps? He pushes back against gamzee and it's sort of fun for him, lets him talk shit just because he want to hear what he has to say. The main thing with this au is that gamzee is just sort of bored. He's just sort of floated through most of his life, doing what other people think he should do or be and karkat catches his attention. And then also. You ever want to see someone Made obedient? Karkat has such a big personality, wants to see him made small. Just for him, though.
And then for karkat's end, it's in how gamzee treats him in a way that catches him of guard. He can be mean and weird and violent, which he expected, but there's also the banter, how gamzee allows him more freedoms then he would think he'd have, and he can also be very silly and impractical and immature. it lowers his defenses, makes it easier to see him as a person rather than just a clown shaped bogeyman. But there's also the little things he takes away. Doesn't lead karkat around on a leash, but won't let him put on his own shoes. He establishes his ownership of karkat's body pretty fast. It's somewhere between the flashes of vulnerability gamzee shows him and the forced intimacy that the attraction starts.
Song for the au
i wanna share a little thing bc i was trying to write the next bit from karkat's pov, or rewrite it bc i had a bunch done but id didn't quite like it, lmao. so i wrote this instead. it's about gamzee getting karkat some care after deciding to keep him. i thought the very literal hermit crab comparison was Cute.
There was something satisfying about it, seeing the mutant stripped bare. Gloved hands worked with clinical indifference to pluck him from his armor—layers of mismatched leather and stiffened fabric—exposing the small vulnerable body underneath to harsh fluorescent lights. Cutting away to reveal the delicate angles of his bones, blackened bruises blossoming across sweat soaked flesh, and a small collection of scars—though there were surprisingly few. It reminded him of those small skittering creatures he would see on the beach, clad in shells or discarded bottles, trying desperately to protect themselves from the harsh environment of an Alternian beach. Not that it seemed to help, so often broken open and made into a meal by all manner of predators. Himself included.
Hands prodded at the mutant's head, his horns, applying careful pressure, searching for damage that couldn’t be repaired. Despite how breakable he appeared he was still a troll, capable of handling tremendous punishment. It was nothing that couldn’t be healed with time and the Empire’s medical advancements. Wounds were cleaned—coagulated black-red washing away pink—and stitched. Salves were applied generously, and an IV was inserted into a thin arm to replace the fluids he had lost.
The work was quick, efficient, and soon he was left alone with the mutant, now stable, laid out on the table before him. Gamzee placed a hand on his chest, just under the small swell of a breast, fingers fitting into the hollows between his thoracic struts. He could feel the brittle inhale and exhale of breath, the rapid thumping of his pusher—hot and desperate—his own trying violently to chase that rhythm.
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I did it, i wanted to come up with a more evocative title but i hated everything and got frustrated lmao so. But here is the first bit of the fic!!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
some more little thoughts about this au
i tweeted this recently i just wanna document it here for posterity bc digging for tweets sucks.
chahut is the one who starts getting gamzee off of sopor on alternia and in it she sort of mentors him.
Talks about how the messiahs enjoy revelry, how there's truth in intoxication, in the letting go of inhibitions. But gamzee isn't looking for truth, and if there's something the messiahs cannot abide, it's a coward. Asks him, "little brother, what are you running from?"
and then also with eridan. I think he would be jealous of whatever gamzee and karkat have going on. Sees the way gamzee treats karkat and it makes him ache for something. it's not even that he wants to be with gamzee like that, and it's pretty obvious that whatever is happening there is weird and obsessive. he just wants to know what it's like to be so coveted. whenever he and gamzee have to work together he can't help but think about it, especially now that their pitch flirting (and he chooses not to think about how everyone flirts with gamzee like that) has died off now that gamzee has his attention focused on his new pet.
