Butterfinger

There’s no such thing as an inanimate object everything is sentient

If i was a cop i would be drinking in my cruiser all day. #protectandswerve

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if you want pluto to be a planet so bad get out there and fuck it with your penis so it gets big and pregnant. otherwise don't talk to me about it

if you want pluto to be a planet so bad get out there and fuck it with your penis so it gets big and pregnant. otherwise don't talk to me about it

quitting my job to be a full time upstairs neighbor. bowling balls are in the mail as we speak

This is one of your worst posts yet man

You called me dirt sucking poor and told me my carrot looks like a cock

got the dishwasher going today. washer and dryer too. ac and heat both running full blast. all the faucets are on. im using my car's engine as a generator to power one of the trees in the yard. its easy to see why they call it Tuesday

I don't have time for sex, I'm too busy running a blog that only 11 or 12 people care about