Another sleepless night.

The thing is that while Cha se-gye instinctively trusts Shin seo-ri 100%, he doesn't really have much faith in her love for him. Unlike the viewers, he's not privy to her thoughts. As guarded as she is, he doesn't understand her hesitation to love him, stems from deep-seated fear. He doesn't yet know (or fully remember) the events from their past lives, and so doesn't understand the kind of trauma she's been caring around.

From his perspective, he fell in love with this oddity of a woman who appeared into his life like a blazing little sun, a dazzling crimson rose brining light into his bleak and bland life. He felt that instantaneous attraction. Her every action towards him, be it her unflinching trust or her coy manner of speaking, led him to believe that attraction was mutual. So imagine his surprise when he, neck deep in delulu land, confesses his feelings only to be summarily rejected. And not just rejected, no. She then proceeds to lie to him and gaslight him into thinking his feelings are entirely one-sided and she feels nothing for him.

And this has happened a couple of times. Each time Shin seo-ri rejects him or pushes him away, she says things like how "she doesn't feel anything" or "it will never be you, for me" or even "I felt more hugging a dog", "stop being so clingy" etc. These are all played for laughs. We, as the viewer, know that seo-ri wasn't as unaffected as she shows herself to be. That it is all a front to protect herself and also to protect cha se-gye from going down the same tragic path as their past lives.

But cha se-gye doesn't know that. He suspects she feels the same. He can sense her hesitation, her reluctance, the way she lies to him to push him away. But he doesn't know the cause of it. And that, is what makes him so uncertain and insecure about their "some" situationship.

Even the way she finally accepts his confession, they kiss, and she gives him permission to pursue her. She never outright says how she feels. There's no reciprocal love declaration from her. So they end up in a confusing "some" stage that's not actually a relationship yet, only the beginnings of one. So it's understandable that, as with any modern dating scenario, cha se-gye is very much confused about what they are and where he stands with her.

Add to this the recurring dreams of their past lives and his insomnia that leads to his increasingly unstable mood and growing possessiveness and obsession towards Shin seo-ri. When she once again beings to blow hot and cold towards him, combined with his brother's threats and insinuation that they are familiar with each other and that she might have made a deal with him. All of this finally culminates in the ending scene from episode 9.

Following his brother's threats, the smart thing to do is back off and simply break up. Coming to Shin Seo-ri with that troubled state of mind, he's upset that she appears, once again, completely unaffected by any of it. Meanwhile, he can't sleep thinking of those dreams and her "nonsensical" words about what if it were true. Became if it is, and their lives ended in tragedy, then history is about to repeat itself.

He trusts her, and yet he's hurt that she kept the meetings with his brother a secret this whole time. He's terrified something might have happened to her, that she's being coerced or manipulated (an echo of his last life where he called her naive for getting manipulated by the people around her). And a small, nagging part of him is all the more scared that, backed into a corner, she might have been using him to ensure her own survival.

But he loves her, and as much as betrayal hurts, he wants her to be alive, safe, and happy. So he's more than happy to be used by her. So he tells her to be ruthless. To use him as much as she wants (an insinuation that obviously stings). And that he believes her. Even if she's a liar and the time travel part is a lie she made up to fool him, he's 100% okay with being made a fool of. As long as she only has eyes for him. As long as she is ready to be loved by him.

So are we official now? If you'd like, you can call me your husband.