* FADE / WALKER !

do not presume to know me. i not only know the fade; 𝐈 𝐀𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐃𝐄.

“not at all,” he replied as he handed them over, glad to be among other scholars. he had taken some notes on a recent expedition into some ruins. “what are you working on?”

“oh! it’s very interesting,” vara said, voice pitching up a half step. she was excited. she so rarely got to interact with other scholars. though, there were plenty at skyhold. “well, i am looking into fade touched objects. and a touch of lyrium and how they interact. a great many things. which is why these ruins are so very important to me. the veil is thin there. therefore...a possibility of fade touched objects. if you ever find any, i would dearly love to see them. they...shimmer. sometimes. almost like they are constantly being caught in the light.”

     HER GREETING IS MET with a kind smile, and a nod, before he raises his gaze to finally meet hers.   “please,”   he waves a hand dismissively. formalities weren’t needed.   “no need to hold your tongue. what is it you need?”

“well.” his mistake for giving her permission to speak freely. “i wish, or that is to say, i desperately yearn to study your weirwood tree. or heart tree. i wish to study it only. i will not desecrate your heart tree nor would i ever desecrate any heart tree, for i find them fascinating.”

          ❝ yes, well. contrary to popular belief, not everyone from tevinter is an evil magister. ❞ the somewhat snarky comeback had become a knee-jerk reaction for dorian. almost habitual, considering the amount of times he has felt the need to repeat that fact since venturing south. the perception irritated him, clearly. still, he put on a friendly face, a polite smile gracing his lips.

“that’s disappointing. the mustache gives you the evil magister look. hm. well. i won’t complain.”

“ It is a simplification– must I stop in every conversation to explain in excruciating detail concepts I am already well aware you know in order for you to grasp that I too know them ? Or would like to have a conversation that gets anywhere before we both die of old age ? ”

Tristan couldn’t help but chuckle; she looked spirited, quite daring. He was like that, once. Youth was indeed a blissful time.  “ Ma serannas, Vathari. I trust my advisors, therefore I trust in your ability to help.”  His back arched forward, slightly, as to bow gratefully.  “ And do feel free to correct me, my elvhen still needs some work. ”

  “ And — if the snooty elf you speak of is Solas — I suggest an open mind. There aren’t many mages of your ability in the Inquisition. ”  He paused for a moment, pondering.  “ Actually, it’s only the two of you. Thread carefully. ” Strengthening his back, he continued.  “ Have you already been shown your quarters, then? ”

“your elvhen is just find, my friend! i gathered what you meant, and your pronunciation was good. i am no great purist, either way. that you took time to learn it is a testament to your willingness to listen. a very admirable trait.”

she snorts at the open mind. “i will keep an open mind if he does. and if he stays away from me. hard to do when i am lodged with adan for the time being. being slightly okay  at potions has put me in the spot of apprentice potion maker as well. not that i mind.” she waved her hand. 

MELANCHOLY

in longing, you are melancholy. you feel deeply and quietly, the feeling of yearning constant, like your own personal raincloud over your head that rains cold and collects in your heart, sometimes filling to overflow. the feeling follows you around and you push it away, but its always just a step behind; when it catches up to you, it turns your expression from a bright smile to a brief look down and your lips pulled into a kind of grimace. you bite your lip to break the look and hope no one notices. but secretly you hope someone did. you know this feeling is a creation of your own mind but you just can't shake it, and in some ways, you don't even want to. you know in your head what you desire is doubtful, but in your heart you don't want to give it up. the feeling is close to sadness but it's deeper, more meaningful than that. it pulls at your gut in a way that could bring you close to tears with a mere thought of that which you seek. be strong my love, your time will come.

NEPTUNE

You’re the forgotten one. It doesn’t matter where you go, but you’re the forgotten one. You don’t mean to be, it’s not something you enjoy - it makes you feel alienated and makes you sink further, further than you’d ever like to admit to another living human being. You haven’t quite found the select few that would die for you - and if you have, you haven’t realized it yet, have you? You have your doubts - and that’s okay, really, it’s hard to trust when you’re always being left behind. You’re not lesser for it. Regardless of whether you’re left behind physically, emotionally, or academically, it’s okay. It’s okay to take more time than you need and it’s okay to be slower than others, because that’s how you’re wired and you need to be told that that’s okay. It’s in our nature to be different, to be individual - that’s what makes us special, no? Not a single perfect replica in the world - and you need to own that. It’s easier said than done, but there’s never going to be another you and you need to accept that to get your life in order, to do what you want to do. Take a look at your priorities, at your life, see what’s making you miserable. It’ll be glaringly obvious when you do. And, perhaps, give yourself an apology.

tagged by: @blightmantra (ty!!)

life philosophy headcanons // accepting

leading a good life means you learn everything you can while you can. vara is a firm believer in being a know it all. in fact, it's her life long dream.

"i've seen hair like yours before, your grace. the image of valyria."