high priestess.

MOVED.

Uther did have a talk with him about being appropriate towards Morgana. It was why he distanced himself despite not wanting too. In his eyes, he wanted to be more than friends with the lady, but because she had no genuine prospects, his father would be against such a union. Biting his tongue about his feelings, he had no choice but to be silent. Nothing could ever come from it. Well, not unless he was king. Arthur still trusted her more than anything. Which was why he wanted to come clean with her. “At the age of nine, something happened… I didn’t know at first but after the woman who I am friends with confirmed it… I have magic and been learning under the priestesses of the old religion.” 

Normally, he didn’t stutter. The prince’s nerves were on end by this point and his hands were shaking. Clasping them together tightly, he swore under his breath. Refusing to look at Morgana at first, he hung his head as if ashamed. He knew the truth about his mother. Shirya and Morgause had told him. Pendragon then got to meet his mother and actually hold on to her. They promised when the time was right, he could again. That was not until four blood moons and four cycles from now. Four years he would have to wait. It was why he resented Uther so much. Why he kept his distance more and more. 

“I have my ways. There’s a route I take that cuts the journey in half and if I can’t get away, Shirya comes here to my chambers at night to teach me.” It was a risk on her part, but the priestess said he was well worth it. Plus, no cell could hold her. All she had to do was magic and whisk herself away. “Shirya’s like a mother to me. She pretty much adopted me.” He admitted to her. Gazing towards the other, he breathed steadily out. “I’m glad I wasn’t asleep then. I doubt I’ll be able too.” There was a sleeping draft he had in his cabinet locked up for such occasion. “Maybe there is a way where you can be. Shirya left a horn for me in the room and I use that for when I can’t reach the Isle. I could use it a night. It’s soundless so no one would hear it. She could teach you as well.” For once, he was excited about this. He could actually have someone to practice with and  Morgause, no doubt, would be coming as well. “In between her coming, I can teach you as well.” Nights would be a time he would look forward to now. Most likely, he would dismiss Merlin early so he could be with Morgana. Seeing her yawn, he patted her hand and smiled. “We can start tomorrow night. First thing. I think it’s time you met my adoptive mother.” He understood why she didn’t want him to sleep here. Leaning over to kiss her on the cheek, gently, he went to climb to his feet. “Til tomorrow M’lady.”

“You’ve known since you were nine?” Morgana asked, clearly surprised that he’d known for so long and for having had found it out at such a young age. He must have been so scared when he’d found out, she couldn’t imagine living with that fear from such a young age and knowing your very own father would have you killed, he must have been terrified. Whoever this woman was that had helped him, she knew he must be grateful for having gotten the help in the first place. She frowned a little at him, knowing this person snuck into his chambers, likely by using magic to teach him was a huge risk. Not just for Arthur, but for her too. 

“That’s a terrible risk, Arthur. You should’ve be having her come here like that, what if the two of you were caught?” She’d be burned and who knew what would happen to the Prince. The woman was like a mother to him? She didn’t know what to think about that, so she chose not to comment for now. Uther would most certainly not approve, but then he wouldn’t approve in general. “I don’t know …. like I said, that’s a risk. I’d have to think about that, but there’s no reason why you can’t teach me whatever you learn.” That she was more open to, because she trusted Arthur over others, it. would take her time to open up to the idea of meeting someone new and inviting them in like that to teach her magic. 

She did eventually nod, knowing that regardless of what she thought, she would want to meet this woman that Arthur had become so close to as to see as a mother. It seemed that he had this whole separate life that none of them knew about, not that she would tell a soul, but it was a surprise all the same. “Good night, Arthur.” She’d almost called him ‘My Champion’ as she had done some in more recent years. After they bid each other good night, Morgana sighed and tried to lay back down to go to sleep, though it was certainly no easy feat.

- the next morning -

Never in her wildest dreams had Guinevere thought she would be … a royal. Struggling with the concept, she had decided to focus on what she did before. Her chores. If her ‘father’ saw her, he would surely blow a casket. Wasn’t she supposed to be doing her royal lessons? Probably. It was too much to think about. The first lesson had her head spinning. So many rules. Being a maid was simpler. Spending time in her new chambers, she shut herself up just so she could grasp everything. Her brother had visited and tried to talk to her about everything. Gwen didn’t really have answers. Was she expected to go to Scotland? Camelot was all she knew. It was her home. No, she couldn’t just leave. 

Hearing Morgana as she put her dress she washed away, she closed the cabinet door and just stood there. Her eyes felt hot. So much weight on her shoulders and it felt like it was crashing down suddenly. If she could be vulnerable around anyone, it was Le Fay. “Morgana…. I couldn’t…. I don’t know….” Her lip quivered as the tears fell and she let her hand drop. “I can’t do this… this is not who I am.” She finally faced her as she sobbed. 

Morgana did not expect the tears, but she could see her old maid was beginning to tear up. She felt sympathy for her more than jealousy, though Morgana did tend to be the jealous sort despite trying her best not to be. Knowing she could not be that now, she stood and went over to her friend, taking her into her arms to comfort her. She was not like Arthur and Uther, immune to comfort and companionship. Her father had taught her it was best to do this, to be there for people. It showed that you had compassion, which she surely did. “I’m so sorry, Gwen. I know this must be a huge ordeal for you. None of us would have ever expected it.” In truth, it still seemed like something out of a fantasy book, which was saying a lot given their lives.

Rubbing soft circles on Guinevere’s back, she guided her to her bed and pulled away, gesturing for her to sit at the edge of it with her. Maybe the two of them could get away with having a girls day together. She could take her out by the lake. Morgana knew all of the secret ways out of the castle, it’d be easy to get on her horse and ride. With Uther so busy with Guinevere’s ‘father’, he would not notice them leave. At least that was the hope and if anything, she could leave a note.

@faygana​ sent ❝  i don’t need your permission to fall in love with you.  you don’t gotta love me back,  but it isn’t gonna stop me from being here when you need someone.  ❞

Sitting there, Guinevere had stayed silent. It was obvious Morgana was jumping to conclusions without her needing to stay anything. A heavily escaped the princess as she waited for the other to be done. “You love me?” Trailing off for now, she tilted her head and raised her brows. “Morgana… I didn’t say you needed my permission. I just thought … I don’t know someone with my upbringing … I couldn’t be good enough for you, but if you’re saying you love me regardless, then who I am to deny you?” Tears showed in her eyes as she stood up. “I love you too.”

No, Guinevere was not the sort of person that she should love. Then again, Morgana had never cared about someone’s rank, it was why she befriended servants long before now and Gwen was no exception to that, only she had fallen in love with her and she hadn’t expected it either, however, she accepted it. “Guinevere, you know I have never cared about who’s title was what, just about the person.” Stepping closer, Morgana knew that she feared rejection and she hoped that she wouldn’t it now, however seeing the tears and hearing those three words, the witch took the servants hands in her own and squeezed them ever so gently before she leaned in to kiss her o on the cheek. She would start slow as to not make Gwen feel pressured or scared, given their circumstances. “You have no idea how happy you make me to hear that, Gwen. Truly. I admit I was afraid that you would not feel the same.”

“I don’t know. I just can hope when I am king, I can change it all.” He admitted to the lady solemnly. Sitting on her bed, he hung his head. Arthur should have confessed his secret a long time ago. The prince was far younger than Morgana when he came into his magic. If it wasn’t for Morgause, he would have probably been found out by his father and put to death. The priestess was like a second mother to him. Through her, he was able to meet Ygraine. It was closing time for him to see her again, and he wondered if Le Fay would want to meet his mentor. Maybe she could help her too, like she did with him all those years ago. It was a thought. He knew where the meeting place was. The magic surrounding the area allowed him in. It knew him and greeted him each time. 

“I was scared. When you told me about your dreams, it reminded me of when I started mine. I only have mine under control because of this.” Fingers went under his tunic and lifted a pendent up. It was pure crystal, and the magic hummed off of it. Spells were intertwined into the actual stone and protected him against his dreams, along with enchantments. “I was nine when mine started… If I didn’t meet Morgause all those years ago, I would have met the pyre. I can have you meet her. Maybe she could teach you as well.” Glancing over at her, he placed his hand on hers. “I agree. Together, we can be a force to be reckoned with.”

Morgana knew of Morgause, she knew that the woman was her older half-sister. She had learned that she had gained her own magic through their mother rather than their father, which in all truth made sense as Glories had never shown signs of having magic. Still, he didn’t persecute it like Uther did, though in his presence, she remembered him acting like he was against magic. If only Uther had accepted it, she thought. Everyone wouldn’t have to pretend around him. More people were for magic than against it far more than she was sure he realized.

 Merlin didn’t mean to make his words sound bitter nor spiteful, but just like with everyone else he tried to mend things and see the best even in those who seemed like a lost case. When he used that poison he was aware he’s crossed a line and maybe this act of his broke something for good between him and Morgana but deep down he still had a little hope left in him. Before he’d have said anything he looked around carefully to make sure no-one was eavesdropping on their conversation. “I want to apologise. I know what I did was reckless but—I couldn’t let everyone else die, I had to do something to stop Morgause. I felt like I had no other choice.” Merlin felt like this may sound like a weak excuse but in a way it was true, because this seemed to be the only solution. “But this isn’t the only thing I meant to say to you…I should have said this the first time you confided me with your dreams…” Merlin stopped talking as two guards were approaching and eventually walked past them. “If you still have any trust in me then meet me at Gaius’ chambers in about ten minutes.” Merlin gave her a look which he hoped reflected that his intentions were good. The only reason he invited her to Gaius’ study was because he knew his uncle was down at the market, otherwise he’d have done more than just disapprove of what the young warlock was about to do. * Later on he was nervously twirling a loose thread which hung from his weary shirt while he truly hoped that Morgana would come. 

No other choice, Morgana could understand that. It was why she had sided with Morgause in the first place, because she knew that she would never be free of Uther and his reign. She would never be safe with him around, nor would anyone else of her own kind. “Surely something else could have been done, Merlin. I could have died.” She had died, she had been brought back thanks to the High Priestesses of the Old Religion. She was now on her way to becoming one herself, not that she intended to tell anyone here that. It was a high honour and one that would hold through generations.

Her gaze met his and she didn’t know why, but Morgana sensed that she could trust him. She didn’t want to, she still felt the sting of his betrayal even if he had apologized to her. It would take more than an apology for him to earn any sort of forgiveness, but she could respect that he was at least trying. Swallowing thickly, she worried this was a trap, but knew better. He would not try anything now, there weren’t any risks. And besides, Gaius could come in and stop whatever might occur if need be while they were there. The raven haired beauty nodded, agreeing with him. She was curious about what he had to say and with so many guards around, this was not time.

“Ten minutes,” Morgana agreed quietly with another subtle nod. They parted ways, Morgana continuing her wanderings of the castle. She slowly made her way toward Gaius’s chambers, the path familiar to her. If anyone saw her going there, they would assume she was there to speak with the physician, which was not that unusual for her to begin with, though she hadn’t a need for his sleeping drafts for some time. The bracelet Morgause had given her so long ago could still be seen on her wrist and it comforted her at night more than any tonic would.

When she stepped into Gaius’s quarters, Merlin was there. He looked nervous, which was not a look she didn’t find alarming. Of course he was nervous. Shutting the door behind them, Morgana stepped toward him, her dress fluttering behind her as she neared the servant.