be shrekcellent

mozzarella and parmesan is kind of like the age gap yuri of cheese

they should invent a body that feels normal to be inside of

sad feeling to try to mutualbait when the mutual you wanted to bait already finished their tumblr shift for the day

resurrected dead wife watching her own montage: wow I looked so hot in that

i’m at such a ?? time of my life i’m just ???????????????????????? like ????????

i imagine being medicated would feel good as fuck. unfortunately i have to rawdog whatever's wrong with me

brought nothing to the gun fight. whatever man

i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

i love you semicolon. no one look at my 80 word sentence

the thing about phone in bed is that it's so awesome. almost makes you feel like betraying & destroying yourself for nothing isn't all so bad

Vote for me and I will make werewolves real

Top scientists wil work hard round the clock to make it a reality

Bottom scientists as well

@eydika