Dumpster Fire

I am so atrociously depressed right now. I thought I had chosen the right career path, and I’ve spent a lot of money and so many years to do so, and now I may not even be able to get a job at the end of it all. I’ve made a horrible mistake and turned down an opportunity that might help me get a job because it is taking place at a completely inconvenient time and my advisor recommended turning it down, but I’m having so many second thoughts…I also don’t even know if I want to do this at all anymore, I just want to lay in bed and rot.

I just finished a month long internship at a school I really want to go to and I worked 13 hour days, did everything anyone asked of me, tried so so so hard to impress them, and I am leaving feeling like they hated me. I got almost no positive feedback and the team I worked with didn’t seem to care if I was there or not . Now I feel like I just wasted the last month, my only opportunity to impress them before I apply. I’m so worthless, I don’t know why they would want me there anyway.