Alex

if I were a bee I'd fetishize the idea of a beekeeper clipping my tiny wings so I can't escape (remembers you're not supposed to say shit like that) I mean yesterday I ate two yogurts normally

gonna be so real i did not realize the bottom was about purchasing and shipping automobile parts. I thought they were straight up intending to kill and dismantle the UPS truck like some auto mechanic apex predator.

reminded me of a post i saw for "how to get a big block v8 for cheap" and it was about renting a uhaul truck for a few days and taking the engine out of it and putting it in your own vehicle and putting the smaller v8 from your own vehicle into the uhaul truck and then returning it

Sooner or later leftists will have to deal with the issue that capitalism has made many people used to wanton excess and sooner or later we'll have to legit tell everyone we can't have plastic treats and luxury produce or cruises instantly available year round and it's gonna make so many people mad and call you a big meanie worse than stalin over it. It will not be popular at all but someone's gotta hold a firm no or the planet will never stop collapsing. We can't save the planet by living exactly how we do now just with a communist banner over it we have to take a loss sorry, shein product cycles shouldn't have been normalized to begin with.

The banana discourse really separated the wheat from the chaff of which "lefties" actually want a global workers revolution and which ones just want more stuff to be free

you have to love the tgirl even when she is too disabled to do the dishes okay? you have to.

i just rescued a pill bug they’re gonna reward me with a million pill bucks i’m gonna be a fucking pillionaire

💵🫲}([[[[[)

I JUST MADE ONE PILLION DOLLARS

did you hear mark zuckerberg renamed facebook to ligma

what’s facebook

what’s facebook

who the hell is mark zuckerberg

someone needs to stop this blue guy

just had an extremely funny memory of being 9 years old and wondering if i was gay and then deciding i couldn't be because gay people were so rare that it was statistically improbable for me to be one

a while later i came to terms with it and instead of having a breakdown i just became insufferably smug about my perceived uniqueness. walking around like wow.... i must be the only gay person in this entire school, nay, this entire town

was trying to isolate the point at which i actually, verbally came out to my mother (not that i needed to, since she apparently had me pinned as a dyke from the age of 3), and i'm pretty certain it was at a Glee Live concert when i was 12, because i have a dim recollection of turning to her and asking "what would you say if i told you i was a lesbian?" and her replying "i'd tell you to shut up because the concert is about to start"