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Mike Driver
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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ojovivo
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@evilpineapple-offical
Gang I’m low-key gay
Hello. I am now the gay. Surprising, huh? Ah well.
Any straights will be punished with death. Any cishets will be punished with death. Any cis will be punished depending in the severity.
back now but not straight gang
GUYS I’M NOT STRAIGHT READ THE DAMN POST
OK GUYS BACK TO NORMAL!! I’ve started a grenade and gun business!!
I’m also a mercenary!! Please hire me I’m broke
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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you might like to know that @salamander-offical is back, by the way.
I know he is back
Im waiting for an apology
For all the pain and all his slack
All of which he gave to me
oh love, who languished out at sea:
sal'mander comes to rescue thee
for on dry land doth 'mander rest:
return, and find again true rest
Although your ryhmed a word itself
Life without you is simply hell
So back to land this bird shall fly
And with its mander it will lie
where once, twice, thrice is avant-garde
'tis true: to self-rhyme twice makes scars
in this, then, 'mander will accede:
your words are art! it is decreed.
I love you
I love you
I love you
are you... apologising for something? you sound... distressed.
Of course im apologizing
I fail you every day my king
That i cant respondwith your name
that is not a failing of yours! that was caused by circumstances far beyond your control. please, do not blame yourself.
Who the fuck are you
my dear? are you quite alright?
chat is this yaoi (?)
sorry bad timing I’m gonna go
Poet is not a man
Although of yaoi im a fan
Oh my bad I shall fix my language
Chat is this neither yuri nor yaoi but some secret third thing
Name any other clothing article.
I'm better than them 100%
Convince me otherwise
fishnets.
DON'T COMPARE ME TO MY PAST EMO PHASE! I WAS STUPID BACK THE OK?!?!?!?
you might like to know that @salamander-offical is back, by the way.
I know he is back
Im waiting for an apology
For all the pain and all his slack
All of which he gave to me
oh love, who languished out at sea:
sal'mander comes to rescue thee
for on dry land doth 'mander rest:
return, and find again true rest
Although your ryhmed a word itself
Life without you is simply hell
So back to land this bird shall fly
And with its mander it will lie
where once, twice, thrice is avant-garde
'tis true: to self-rhyme twice makes scars
in this, then, 'mander will accede:
your words are art! it is decreed.
I love you
I love you
I love you
are you... apologising for something? you sound... distressed.
Of course im apologizing
I fail you every day my king
That i cant respondwith your name
that is not a failing of yours! that was caused by circumstances far beyond your control. please, do not blame yourself.
Who the fuck are you
my dear? are you quite alright?
chat is this yaoi (?)
sorry bad timing I’m gonna go
Name any other clothing article.
I'm better than them 100%
Convince me otherwise
fishnets.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Way too funny not to share
Trust Gru
@no-one-offical :3
salamander has decided to start providing a service, of sorts.
should any offical wish, they may have salamander perform one action, provide one item or set of items, cast one spell, or give one piece of honest advice. details are of course up for negotiation, and other forms of assistance may well be amenable: that is up to salamander's discretion.
in short, salamander is establishing salamander's services as a 'patron-for-hire', of sorts.
negotiable as the details of the request are, however, the payment remains fixed. salamander insists that as compensation for any patronage, salamander be offered a secret.
one secret, freely given. that is the cost of salamander's assistance. take it, leave it; salamander cares not. but know that salamander is impartial: you may opt to ignore this offer, yet your adversaries may take salamander up on it. and are you sure you want to give them that advantage?
I need advice. Do you want to hear what I need advice on first or the secret?
make your request before anything else. you would not hire a contractor without first telling them the nature of the job for which they are being hired; this arrangement is much the same.
Well uh.. I’m pretty sure something is coming for both me and No One, and I don’t know what to do to make sure everyone is safe. Including the kids because I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re in danger too. I believe my mother and the stars may be involved with part of it, but there’s also people that No One knows that are unrelated to that. So basically what do I do. And yes, I have tried asking No One what’s going on with his half, but he likes avoiding questions.
salamander could offer you advice, yes. or, should it be more to your taste, salamander can offer you and those around you some level of protection against what is to come. which would you prefer?
Uh… yeah. Sure. Protection. Just uh… preferably don’t tell anyone unless it’s necessary. Please.
in that case...
[Salamander produces a ring, a green gemstone inlaid in it. It is reminiscent of emerald, yet simultaneously resembles an eye staring out of the setting.]
one secret of your choosing, and this ring is yours. it contains a number of passive protective wards, as well as a failsafe: if the ring spies a dangerous foe, salamander will be summoned to your side.
now. speak your truth.
Okay… I’ve never actually said this out loud before… Uhm… so basically, ten thousand years ago, the day before I finally fought back against my mother, I killed my three best friends. I’ve told everyone that my mother did, but I lied. I don’t know if that’s a good secret, but it’s the only one I’m willing to share. It’s also what triggered the event that caused my home world to almost entirely collapse.
that's more like it! salamander's other clients could learn a thing or two from you.
[Salamander hands you the ring.]
you may take this for yourself, or give it to another. either way, it is yours.
Oh. Alright. Thanks. That was easier than I expected.
do other countries do the whole “leaving furniture you want gone on the curb for other people to just grab” or is that an american thing
The Dutch do it and it's called The King's Gift, but when Brits do it, taking the stuff is actually a crime called, wait for it, Theft By Finding.
Australia does it and nobody gives a fuck
personally I'm annoyed by the socioeconomic conditions that made words like "unalive" necessary but simultaneously impressed by the linguistic adaptations young people have made to continue talking about important things while subject to those conditions and I think if you can't hold both of those thoughts in your head you might just be old man yelling at cloud
Two of my niblings (10 and 7) self-censor like this in real life during actual conversations. I tried briefly to explain to the 10-year-old that they didn't have to do that in real life after they said "unalive" out loud in casual conversation, and they just said they preferred to. On the one hand, I'm sad to see them unconsciously and fully without awareness succumbing to the panopticon. On the other... this post.
it's not unprecedented in the evolution of languages to see euphemisms adopted as synonyms or even supplanting earlier terms. lots of people say "passed away" even in situations where there would be no particular social cost to saying "died".
for a particularly strong version of this kind of replacement: the word "bear" comes from a proto-Germanic word meaning "brown one" because there was a taboo against saying the animal's actual name. the taboo is gone but it was so strong in the past that we have no record of what the proto-Germanic word for "bear" even was.
maybe in 300 years the word "die" will be archaic and kids will dig it out of an etymology textbook and start using it because "unalive" is getting censored.
die has actually already undergone this process. die originally meant "flow" (i guess it's like you're flowing out of life or something? or maybe your life is flowing out of you idk). it was (probably) loaned from old norse to displace the now obsolete "swelt". and yes, that is the root word of "sweltering"
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
some fucking resources for all ur writing fuckin needs
body language masterlist
a translator that doesn’t eat ass like google translate does
a reverse dictionary for when ur brain freezes
550 words to say instead of fuckin said
638 character traits for when ur brain freezes again
some more body language help
REBLOG TO SAVE A WRITER
salamander has decided to start providing a service, of sorts.
should any offical wish, they may have salamander perform one action, provide one item or set of items, cast one spell, or give one piece of honest advice. details are of course up for negotiation, and other forms of assistance may well be amenable: that is up to salamander's discretion.
in short, salamander is establishing salamander's services as a 'patron-for-hire', of sorts.
negotiable as the details of the request are, however, the payment remains fixed. salamander insists that as compensation for any patronage, salamander be offered a secret.
one secret, freely given. that is the cost of salamander's assistance. take it, leave it; salamander cares not. but know that salamander is impartial: you may opt to ignore this offer, yet your adversaries may take salamander up on it. and are you sure you want to give them that advantage?
I need advice. Do you want to hear what I need advice on first or the secret?
make your request before anything else. you would not hire a contractor without first telling them the nature of the job for which they are being hired; this arrangement is much the same.
Well uh.. I’m pretty sure something is coming for both me and No One, and I don’t know what to do to make sure everyone is safe. Including the kids because I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re in danger too. I believe my mother and the stars may be involved with part of it, but there’s also people that No One knows that are unrelated to that. So basically what do I do. And yes, I have tried asking No One what’s going on with his half, but he likes avoiding questions.
salamander could offer you advice, yes. or, should it be more to your taste, salamander can offer you and those around you some level of protection against what is to come. which would you prefer?
Uh… yeah. Sure. Protection. Just uh… preferably don’t tell anyone unless it’s necessary. Please.
in that case...
[Salamander produces a ring, a green gemstone inlaid in it. It is reminiscent of emerald, yet simultaneously resembles an eye staring out of the setting.]
one secret of your choosing, and this ring is yours. it contains a number of passive protective wards, as well as a failsafe: if the ring spies a dangerous foe, salamander will be summoned to your side.
now. speak your truth.
Okay… I’ve never actually said this out loud before… Uhm… so basically, ten thousand years ago, the day before I finally fought back against my mother, I killed my three best friends. I’ve told everyone that my mother did, but I lied. I don’t know if that’s a good secret, but it’s the only one I’m willing to share. It’s also what triggered the event that caused my home world to almost entirely collapse.
looks around nervously
please go watch the music video for Masquerade Party by cg5 please i need someone i yap abt the propoganda to
I just watched it and why is it actual peak
You already know
moths :3
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Why do 8 year olds have more highschool dating drama than me 😭
high school?? EIGHT year olds??
?? it starts at 15 here😭
it starts at 12/13 here
Ive been having fun if you cant tell lol
@evilpineapple-offical @no-one-offical
LMAO beautiful
