—— #ETOILESFANTOME. PHANTOM STARS. by rowan ( 30+, he/they) . VERSO DESSENDRE from CLAIR OBSCUR: EXPEDITION 33. independent and selective. currently high activity. canon-compliant but heavily headcanon influenced. —— CARRD. MEMES.
:: extremely ANTI-AI. DNI if you use generative AI in any capacity. ( graphics, writing, art, etc. )
blog wide trigger warnings for: suicidal ideation; descriptions of de-personalization, disassociation, and existential fears; canon-typical violence; depression; family trauma.
:: no longer tagging spoilers! due to the nature of the character, if you haven't finished the game, tread with caution. i'll happily write both painted!verso and painter!verso. i default to painted, but if you'd prefer real-world, just let me know!
blogroll:
@simioso ( simon, expedition 33 )
@crosaidi ( paerin, fantasy based oc )
in canon verses, though i write all dialogue in english, he's speaking french natively and is not fluent in english. i don't know the language so i'm not even going to try to mangle it. 💀
in modern verses, his first language is french, but he does speak english with a noticable accent.
immortality is a curse he deals with no matter the verse ( aside from painter/1900s paris ).
painted verso pre-fracture and non-canvas painter verso are very similar people. however, painted verso goes through a lot of trauma, and he's very different and a lot more tired and jaded by in-game time. painted, painter, their respective childhood timelines, and the faded boy are all open for request for threads.
i have an open post-game AU where he's talked out of his plan and returns to lumiere in sort of a mixed ending. feel free to toss him in post-game stuff if you like.
he's depressed, desperate, dealing with a lot of PTSD and trauma, and frequently wars with feeling not real or like a copy of something that was supposed to be. these themes will be heavily present in canon verses.
i place him as roughly 10 years older than alicia, and about a year younger than clea. if you write either of these two and it doesn't work for you, let me know!
verso does not dye his hair. it was a smart remark he made as a joke and that was it. real verso was born with the white streak in his hair. he went through a few periods in his life where he dyed his hair black to hide it, but by the time he was an adult he stopped. painted verso also always had the white streak. [ headcanon ] [ headcanon ] [ headcanon ]
i typically headcanon that he was a little in love with both simon and julie during different parts of his life. if you write these characters, reciprocation is not expected and i won't assume.
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"Skill is subjective - to me you play several quite well. Same as I'm sure you feel about my engineering when I ramble on about my work. Just because you're not an expert in them doesn't mean you're not impressive with them all the same. Among my fellow engineers I'm simply decent at what I do. But outside of them, I'm very skilled." Gustave says simply, waving a light hand before he returns it to curl around the strap across his chest. Gustave did love to sit and listen to Verso play the piano, tucked in his little apartment, curled half on Verso's couch as he played.
It was the same as listening to him compose, they may not be finished, but they still warm something within Gustave's chest, filling him with contentment - a lazy sort of satisfaction at getting to hear work that others may never. But they're both painfully self flagellating when it comes to their skills, to their chosen hobby or profession, and it's ever easier to ease that burden on someone you love and are impressed by.
Verso smirks, and Gustave's lips curl a little, equally pleased as they pass through the science hall. There's a thrill in knowing that Verso wants him equal to the way Gustave wants him. In the way that his chest coils with a bit of heat, pooling through his core like molten lava.
"Yes well, I'm afraid I'm a boring sort of scandal." Gustave says with a laugh, he offers Verso a soft smile as he moves through the opened door, comfortable now to walk just a little closer, elbow brushing Verso's arm occasionally as they step out into the cooler night air. He smiles then, a little shy, reserved and he nods then. "I promise I'll get over it soon, I'm far from shy about dating you - or ashamed. In fact I certainly am in awe that I get to go home with you often." Gustave says it honestly, earnest as he shifts, smiling warmly at Verso. "I know they'll move past it - and I'm under no real impression that our coworkers aren't well aware." He laughs, softly, hazel eyes ducking just a little before he looks at Verso. "But I kind of...like it being our little secret too for now."
It's no secret that Verso enjoys praise; in the bedroom, it stokes passion and sends that flame burning hotter — but out here, it just shows as a pleased and faint flush, a slip of his gaze sidelong, a little dance of a smile. " I don't pretend to be well versed in the world of engineering, " he says, smoothly. " But I do think you don't give yourself nearly enough credit. Your mind works in ways I can't begin to comprehend. "
They're similar in many ways, it's true — but they are, in part, science and art, though it's not really a divide of opposing interests so much as something that can be appreciated from different sides.
But they walk, and he listens, and —— he'd be lying to himself if he didn't admit some parts of it all didn't frustrate him just a little, even though he'd never say it out loud. It's less a worry over a sense of shame than just the reality of watching someone he cares for build walls around themselves —— ( not that he'd be a hypocrite to mention ).
The night's pleasant and the campus isn't empty; it rarely is. But the few students and staff still around don't stop them, and he isn't inclined to stop and make conversation. " I know, " he reassures, quiet, to the reassurance —— and he stifles a thin little smile at the acknowledgement of their coworkers. God, he's seen the smiles and nudges. " It's okay, really. It's our business. " And he does mean it. " Besides, if it means I can drop you little notes and messages while you have to pretend to not notice them, " and boy, his eyes dance, that smile teases, " I'll just take it as consolation. "
"Mm, now I suppose that is fair. You're far from boring - brilliant composer and overall talented musician. Remind me, how many instruments do you play again?" He loves listening to Verso compose, listening to the man piece together beautiful works of music. Playing them out and reworking them with the diligent skill of someone who puts his soul into each piece. It's like magic, listening as Verso's works come together. "You're far less dull than I." He chuckles softly.
The playful smile with his flirty little wink should be ridiculous or cocky, but all it does is pull a warm, deeply affectionate smile from Gustave. He finds himself boring, too married to his work to be near the attentive lover that Verso deserves. Or any lover he's ever attempted to take deserves. But Verso likes being with him and Gustave isn't willing to just give that up. He gives a dramatic little gasp, playful as he presses his prosthetic to his chest - just over his heart. "Me? I'm perfectly innocent." He says it with a level of playful mock offense that was completely ruined by his own flirtatious nature in his office not five minutes prior.
Gustave doesn't miss the murmured aside, his lips curving a little into a smirk. "Naughty." He murmurs, but it's light, and Gustave is faintly pleased with the way Verso is just as hungry for him as Gustave was for him. The door is locked behind him and Gustave tucks the key away as they make their way down the dim halls, the echoing tap, tap of their shoes as they walk along marble floors.
"They're horrendous gossips. But more than even that - my previous disastrous failure of a relationship is not a mark I want to leave on your reputation. And while I know you don't care persay, I don't want to ruin that for you - our personal lives are for us to worry about." He'd been a disaster after everything with Sophie - a spectacular failure that lead to the whole class knowing just how badly he'd failed.
Verso gives a soft little laugh in answer, gaze ducking briefly. " How many do I play or how many do I play well? " The piano would always be his first love; he has rudimentary working knowledge of many, and playable knowledge of a few. But the piano —— ah, that will forever be his true love, won't it? The guitar comes a somewhat distant second, and mostly because it's far more portable; it's hard to have a romantic evening in the park and take a piano with him.
Composing is —— fickle. He's good at it, but finished works are few and far between. They often land somewhere without proper endings, and perhaps that's why he's teaching instead of writing and performing, but, well — life ends where it will. He has no regrets — and besides, it leaves less pressure on him for doing it when he enjoys doing it, which for someone who puts an outrageous amount of pressure on himself as is ——
Naughty. The accusation earns a little smirk that just buzzes with knowing, but he says nothing else of it for now, content to let that yearning settle. He's never been shy about his wanting; it burns as hot as so much else ever does, with him.
It's funny how the halls of this building have become just as familiar of late as those of the building he's usually in. He easily allows companionable space — an easy distance, a familiar distance, but not an intimate one. " My reputation? " A brow raises, a smile haunts. " I feel like the more scandalous musicians are, the better. Or any artist, really. Most successful artists are disasters in some way or another. " He opens the door for him as they head outside, the night air cool and pleasant. " They're college kids. They're used to relationship drama. Unless it involves something criminal, they're usually on to the next thing in weeks. " And it's fond, really, if not a little wry. " God, I sound like an old man. Anyway. I'm not bothered. Really. "
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Oh, how innocent he pretends to be. Julie has never seen someone so keenly aware of the effect they have, and at this point, it's blatantly unfair.
A subtle frown creases between her brows. This is precise work, and she absolutely cannot look over at him, no matter what he says, no matter how oblivious he claims to be-- And... yes. Too late.
Her eyes flicker for the briefest second to Verso's annoyingly captivating visage. Damn him and the way he drapes himself over that chair. Still smiling. There are many ways coming to mind of how she might deal with that, and she's certain he'll enjoy many of them far too much. The corner of her mouth twitches.
"Flatterer," she accuses coyly as her eyes remain resolutely locked on the paper beneath her. Fingers rest against the ruler, guiding her lines, before deftly picking it up and tapping it against his hand with a satisfying yet soft thwack. "Consider yourself chastised. You must have learned by now that'll get you nowhere."
It's such a lie that she expects to be proven wrong instantly. So much so that she slides a knowing grin his way, eyes meeting his for a fleeting moment.
The ruler taps him across the knuckles; it's barely enough to feel, let alone to actually sting, and even so he flits his fingers back with a laugh, a protest in the way of an, " Ow, " and a dramatic rub of the back of his hand. " Hey, maybe I should be a distraction more often, then, if getting chastised by the prettiest girl in Lumiére is my punishment. "
Oh, yes, he's laying it on thick: there's a playful jaunt to it, certainly, but he's laying it on. Not that it's not true — god, he's felt himself pulled towards her with a dramatic yearning since the very first days they met — but he's not above being him, either.
And oh, he sees that little grin when she looks his way, catches his eye; he burns with pleasure from it, warm in a way no one else makes him feel. It's the kind of warmth that makes him feel as though his entire heart may melt away and he'd let it: god, he'd let it.
For now, though, he just gives a low and considering hum, resuming his artful drape over the back of the chair. " I suppose I could be all —— dry and dull instead. Sit here the whole time like —— " And he scrunches his shoulders, furrowing his brows, attempting dour but honestly really coming across as broodily pouting; it's a look, and it's a look he can't maintain more than half a second before exhaling a laugh. " Would that be better? "
Gustave has considered his desk, it's the perfect height - good, sturdy oak and his office has a lock. Oh believe him, he's considered it - in a way he never had before dating Verso. But Verso brings something out of him in a way that he'd be embarrassed about were he not well aware of the shared consideration in Verso's pale blue eyes. His tongue darts out to wet his lips and he leans, just a little against the desk - an unintentional tease - the casual rest of his palms against the sturdy surface just to watch the way Verso's eyes darken a little.
Gustave hums softly then, as he shifts his bag on his shoulder, where it crosses his body. "Mm, do I now?" It's playful, flirty as he leans forward. "I'm not sure what you mean, I'm just a boring science teacher~." He croons playfully as he looks at Verso. But he reaches out, taking Verso's hand to bring his knuckles up, brushing his lips soft against them before straightening up properly.
"I'm perfectly innocent, thank you very much." Gustave says it lightly, playfully still as they leave his office, a quiet hum building as they walk. "I can place an order when we get to mine, if you're not terribly hungry yet." Gustave offers, curling his hands around his bag's strap to resist the urge to take Verso's hand. Inevitably he's going to drop the pretense that they're not a couple walking, but until they leave the grounds, they're coworkers walking off campus together. "Thank you, for your patience with-" he gestures vaguely at himself, a crooked little smile tugging at his lips, a bit anxiously. "I know it's not easy."
" You're as much as a boring science teacher as I am a dull music teacher, " and it's low and with a tip of his brows, the smile lingering and dancing as lips brush his knuckles. It's a soft gesture, warm and easy, and it warms his heart with an almost embarrassing weakness in his knees every time. " And we all know I'm anything but dull. "
And it would be cocky coming from most — it still is, a little — but it's paired with a little silly grin and a flirty wink, and he's not taking himself terribly seriously in this moment at all —— though he is adamant that Gustave is anything but boring. " And I think I'd like to hear your definition of innocent, because if we're going with the one I know, you, my dear, are anything but. "
Another cheeky little grin, and he gives an agreeable sound to the offer — and of course can't help the little muttered aside, " Hungry for something anyway, " but they're leaving so he exhales a sigh and behaves otherwise. It's strange this time of night — these halls are almost creepy in their own way, dim and quiet, and their steps echo. There's a certain liminality to these moments that his older artistic heart doesn't miss.
He's torn from those thoughts by those words, though, and he tips a look over — and it's not untrue, precisely, but the apology's appreciated. " It makes sense. These kids, gossip goes around like wildfire. "
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Verso's little swears mixed in the litany of praise and begging in the soft way that Gustave loves and it pulls a trail of praise from Gustave as well, desperate and mumbled because he loves this, loves how this feels. "So pretty for me- hah, Verso - mm you're so gorgeous." he can't help the way he wants to praise Verso, to talk about how gorgeous he finds Verso, the way he looks when he comes - especially when it's Gustave's handiwork.
Gustave works his hand over himself only a moment longer before Verso's wrapping his hand around his cock, it's not quite overstimulating, but it's just on the edge of it and god does Gustave shiver under his touch, trembling a little for the man. He's trembling as he's worked through the aftershocks, curling further down into his boyfriend - his lover; it's hard to pick which title he wants to use for Verso - but he goes so willingly into the other man. "You're beautiful." He mumbles - cheeks flushed from the praise and his orgasm and he feels beautiful under Verso's attention.
Gustave huffs, a noisy - playful exasperation as he buries his nose into Verso's collarbone. "Terrible mon cher." He says lightly, but gives a satisfied little sigh as he settles more over Verso - heedless of the mess between them. "That's the death of me you're due to cause. What a way to go though, non? In the arms of a beautiful man." Gustave says with a soft, pleased noise. "Mm, very good morning to you as well." He brushes his lips against Verso's jaw lightly. "Clean up and then breakfast? Else I be tempted to stay in your arms and not eat."
" The perfect kind of death, " he murmurs muzzily in response, the smile still stretched lazily wide. And it's strange, too, because that's a hard thing normally for him to joke about — he often feels like he subverted fate that one day when he survived the fire and that he narrowly escaped something that was supposed to be written in stone. But that's a dour thing, isn't it? Dour and silly and stuck in some old nonsense circling 'round fate.
But now it's hardly a thought at all, and he stretches and groans a little at the satisfying pull of muscle. He ducks his head, burying his nose in Gustave's throat and breathing him in, still a little needy for touch, for closeness. " —— hmph. I take it back. Maybe that will be the cause of our death: not wanting to get out of bed to eat because it's too far away. "
But he's ( mostly ) just grousing and grumbling; he tips his chin up again to kiss him softly. " —— okay. " But even so, he doesn't get up right away; he lays there for a minute more, trying to dredge up the will — but he finally uncurls, pulling himself from the sheets and rising, unbothered about his nudity. He lets his fingers trail over Gustave lazily as he does, heaving over to the bathroom and washbasin to clean up, leaving the door open if Gustave wants to come in with him, though he leaves the invitation unsaid. " Though maybe, " he quips with a little silly grin and wink, angling a look over his shoulder that's just utterly filthy, " having you for breakfast like this counts, him? "
[TXT]: And then you cry about being a tortured artist...
[TXT]: ... I'll bite. Figuratively. What is your collection like? I'm certain it will be more tasteful than a rocket comparison on page 2. Given you are a fellow of quality, and filter your reading.
[ SMS ] :: I like how you have to qualify "figuratively"
[ SMS ] :: Honestly wise, considering this conversation
[ SMS ] :: Hang on a minute
—— about ten minutes later, a photo is sent of a very carefully curated two shelves of bookshelf. there's a separator between two sections.
[ SMS ] :: So the top shelf and about a third of the bottom are the standard faire, but all great. The bottom two thirds is very gay. there's nothing on either i wouldn't enthusiastically recommend. and for more reasons than the smut; there's some great story in most of them. And none of that fairy dragon nonsense, either.
so i bought this controller that's been updated to have full modern capability (full button map of a PS5/Xbox controller) and when i tell you it's now my fav PC game controller and my dumb old millennial heart is SINGING
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The kiss is - as cliche as it might be to think it - it's perfect and Gustave could lose himself into this moment as well. His fingers curl lightly at the hair at the base of Verso's neck, the bench isn't the most feasible for being closer - but it's perfect. Gustave melts into Verso - he's never going to forget the way this feels - the taste of their drinks, the smoke lingering; sweet tobacco on Verso's tongue and in his scent. It's a perfect scene, senses full of Verso's presence and Gustave doesn't want this moment to break.
Their knees press together and Gustave brushes his tongue against Verso's - a response to him, open and willing - the potential for deeper passion makes his stomach flip and he knows they'll behave, but the potential hits him with a surge of interest. Gustave responds with his own noise - faint - wanting and he can't stop the soft, soft protesting noise when Verso pulls back.
Gustave's cheeks are flushed, all the way to his ears and he swallows, lightly looking at Verso as his hand slips to cradle his cheek, thumb stroking lightly as he does. This space has certainly been used for dalliances far beyond their soft, traded kisses of exploration, but nonetheless Gustave flushes. He's never done this before. Too caught up in expectations and requirements as the eldest son to even consider doing something just for himself. And it warms him from the inside out.
Gustave's heart skips a beat and he nods, quickly - perhaps embarrassingly too quickly. "I want to see you again as well, please. I can't begin to describe how much I also want to see you." Gustave says softly, a bit breathless as well as he brushes his thumb along the strong arch of Verso's cheekbone - the skin warm beneath his palm. "Coffee - um. The day after next, I have obligations tomorrow - but after, I'm free."
It's difficult to make those plans and he knows it. It's not as simple as dating, courting —— for as complicated as even that can be, at least it's something that's out in the open. This is so much more layered and complex, more difficult, and he's always known it would be. There's a part of him that resents it — god, he's a romantic at heart and would love nothing more than to step into the world openly with it all — but that's not their reality.
Still: even so, his heart thuds in his ears, and the flush of relief is hot and total; he hadn't even realized he'd tensed while waiting for a response. He can't help but grin, a bright flicker of a thing, and he leans into the touch with an open warmth; his hand comes up to close over Gustave's, holding it there for just a moment longer.
" The day after next. Le Dôme Café? " It's newer, and a place that appeals to a more bohemian art crowd, even if it's often crowded. " If we arrive after breakfast, around ten? It won't be so crowded. " God, he feels almost giddy; he can't even remember the last time he felt so.
" I'll even —— oh, hell, " and he pats down his pockets, brows furrowing in sudden consternation, and he slips out of the bench with a long-legged grace. He finds a nub of a pencil in a drawer, snags a napkin off one of the neat piles on the table, and scrawls a series of numbers on a page. Of course the Dessendres have a private telephone line. " Here, " he says, thrusting it over; he has a neat handwriting, precise and clean with a bit of careless flourish. " In case you need to get in touch. " Please keep in touch.