sit in and watch the sunlight fade

i have SO many feelings about freya for a character who had maybe twenty total minutes of screentime. like. her life was so tragic you’d be forgiven for thinking she’d been subsumed by the trauma, but little pieces of a fully lived life and personality peaked through—she had such a poetic grasp of language as she described her home to merlin. she liked strawberries. the way she lightly teased merlin for conjuring a rose instead of a strawberry, only to be touched because she likes pretty things but has so little occasion for them, doesn’t feel she deserves them. the unapologetic way she (understandably!!!! who wouldn’t in her situation!) wolfs down her food. “it’s good.” her insistence that merlin be careful, being willing to leave without him because she didn’t want him to give up what he had. literally beloved.

prev: #u forgot the best part#the artist figured out the gig and was like#i draw for u for the rest of my life#these chinese netizens are having shojou level romances

shakespeare was so funny for that scene where the antagonist tells the protagonist “let the record show that i AM into women THAT BEING SAID holy shit, thou mars, seeing you here is like an even better version of my wedding night. like WAY better. i’ve been dreaming about you every night for years, and in my dreams we take off each other’s armor and beat each other to a pulp and i wake up all hot and sticky 👍”

I’m thinking about the freya episode in bbc merlin and I’m just a bit like… merlin was ready to leave camelot, to accept all of freya, to face death and lie for her sake. and yes they didn’t know each other for long. but merlin was fully ready to seriously harm or even kill arthur for freya’s sake. infatuation, love, projection, pity— either way, he cared for her, to one extent or another. and what pisses me off is that arthur is like ‘aw merls is sad :( let me ruffle his feathers a little!’ as if this man didn’t just kill merlin’s probable first love. and what annoys me even more is that arthur’s move works. it’s as if freya was suddenly just a childish project gone bad, a pet fish that passed away, and not an entire human being that merlin had evidently cared for. not a girl who was scared of her own humanity or lackthereof which was something merlin certainly related to, not someone merlin visualised a future with. the fact that she was killed by arthur, and then merlin turns around like ‘aww artie you’re forgiven :>’ annoys me so so badly I can’t even. I don’t CARE that arthur was doing his duty, merlin was never mad enough.

Getting plowed is for the country folk. Here in the city we call it being taken to pound town. And if it's a place with decent public transit, getting railed.