hail holy mother

fool me once, shame on u; fool me twice, shame on u again for taking advantage of my compassionate & forgiving nature!!!!!! how dare u

          she doesn’t look too hard at the man on her back porch ( besides a cursory glance that makes her wonder if the bags under his eyes are from sleep deprivation or something worse ), and instead bends and grabs the basket of recently cleaned clothes and takes them to her clothesline. call her old fashioned, but there’s nothing better than air dried clothes. when she sets the basket on the ground, she asks, as casually as she can muster, “Wanna help hang clothes?” 

        she’s in the process of doodling on a bar napkin and singing along to the 80s blaring obnoxiously from the overhead speakers when she realizes that the woman next to her has been staring for a cool minute, now. or maybe it’s one of those drunken stares where the person isn’t really looking at anything? either way, nas feels obligated to figure out of the lady’s okay. tonight is already a babysitting night, why not add another charge? she hopes this one is human, at least. “Havin’ a nice night?” her voice is just loud enough to be heard over the music as she scoots into the barstool next to the lady. “Stayin’ hydrated, yeah?”

       she tries not to be one of those annoying students that asks about homework after the professor has clearly forgotten ( look, she’s bad, but she’s not that bad, okay ), but the tradeoff to that is now she has to channel her annoyingness somewhere else. which is why she’s hovering near her botany professor, trying to work up the nerve to talk to him. nas is jolted closer to him by some starbucks addicted hipster, which makes her panic as she stumbles closer to him--- say something. anything. don’t just stand there like a dumbass. be smooth. “Professor Panzarino!!” close enough. 

    don’t ask to pet the dog. it’s rude. don’t do that.     don’t--- “Your dog is beautiful. She’s so good at     her job. Congrats.” good save, nas. 

iPhone needs a feature where an incoming call doesn’t take up the whole screen so you can do other things while you ignoring a phone call.

i just wanted to let u know that....i keep reading ur url as ‘astro toast’

                                                    ind. oc ;; written by cor

me when i am legitimately hurt/distressed: no no it's fine i've had worse