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AND ONE DAY during a meeting someone (let’s say courfeyrac) goes hey R can i have some of that and he’s like yeah sure and the MOMENT he realises what he’s drinking he spits a mouthful of GRAPE JUICE all over the place and he’s like “R IS THIS??? G R A P E JUICE??” and R just?? yes?? what did you think it was?

“and you’ve been drinking THIS the whole time?”

“uh yeah?? i just never understood why all of you have a problem with it. i mean yeah it’s not the best fruit juice yknow like apple juice is great and all but i personally pre-“

“R HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING GRAPE JUICE AND ONLY GRAPE JUICE IN THOSE BOTTLES THE W H O L E TIME?”

“yes? did you.. did you only just find out?”

“GRANTAIRE WE THOUGHT YOU HAD A DRINKING PROBLEM WE WERE ALL GENUINELY CONCERNED FOR YOU”

“I HAVENT HAD ALCOHOL IN 2 YEARS”

and everyone just.. the meeting doesn’t even happen because everyone just needs to lie down.

BONUS:

“wait a minute… if you’ve been sober all this time then why do you.. you know.. why have you been acting so?? intoxicated? we were all so convinced you were always ALWAYS drunk because of how you act”