GET CRAZY, GET WILD. - JERSEY SHORE QUOTES COLLECTION. a series of quotes from the mtv reality show. some nsfw themes and strong language ahead. change verbiage and pronouns as needed.
alright, i'll make you a grilled cheese, asshole.
you're the worst argument person ever.
it could be dangerous to the health.
my only rule: never fall in love at the jersey shore.
first impressions are everything. so, you got to stay fresh to death, i call it. fresh outfit, fresh haircut, fresh tan. just stay fresh.
i thought you were just being drunk and stupid.
i am like a praying mantis. after i have sex with a guy, i will rip their heads off.
shut your mouth, you dirty little hamster.
they have defied the law of intelligence.
i'm like, a pretty deep dude.
we're beating up the beat. that's what we say when we are doing our fist pump.
how many times you cook for me? none!
one step forward, two step backs.
i hate the ocean. yeah, it's all whale sperm.
hell has to be just like this.
i'm not a snack, i'm a happy meal.
yo, face down, ass up—that's how i like to have a good time.
cry all you want, your tears don't mean shit to me.
i'm sorry i punched you in the face.
i'm not trashy, unless I drink too much.
faux-hawk is like, my best thing.
to drink, or not to drink?
we're ex-boyfriend and girlfriend, and we're hanging out with each other, and like, you know, it's a little awkward bro.
it's juicehead central now. i'm in heaven.
this isn't law school; this is a t-shirt shop.
you don't come in on sunday with a banana and expect everything to be peaches.
i'm the sweetest bitch you'll ever meet, but do not fuck with me.
do i really want to do this right now? does The Situation want to get situated right now?
i am not fucking any of my roommates, therefore i should not be cleaning up after their shit.
it's like a war zone out here. all grenades.
i'm ready to party, get out there. let's get filthy, creepy, and weird.
your eyebrows are so bushy, they collect so much more bacteria than normal eyebrows would.
don't test me, because i will fail a majority of the time.
I.F.F. is the "I'm Fucked Foundation."
i don't care if you talk shit about me. talk shit about me all you want.
we take that with us for life, that bond. ... that was deep. that was fucking deep.
if you leave, i'm going to stuff your fucking nose with tampons.