Moses, Alien Time Traveler

Going On A Ride

Didn’t let him Drive the UFO

He’s still getting the hang of the whole “blinking” thing we do here on Earth

selfy

HE TOOK MY ADDERALL

I received a beautiful gift today to honor my alien

he does not care that we were evacuated from the hurricane. he eat bar and stare at me

the alien doesn’t like the hurricane or his gay little jacket

on his planet, smiling means “twice you have tried to defeat me and twice you have failed. make it thrice and you will not live to try a fourth”

They don’t have reflections on his home planet so this really freaked him out

Hard at Work

Moses always tells me that his favorite time to travel to is the sinking of the RMS Titanic. I don't fucking know why

New Secret

That day, Moses learned to stop eating helium

Moses has been approved as an ESA (Emotional Support Alien), so he is no longer illegally residing in my home. Everyone say congratulations Moses you are a Legal Alien now

Do You Hear What I Hear...