Voided Quintessence, Illuminated Source.

Tarot Deck: Terra Volatile by Credo Quia Absurdum

The question that was asked:

"What ways can I alleviate the conflict that is going on my inner self?"

The following card where pulled:

The 7 of Cups, The 10 of Cups, The 7 of Coins (Pentacles), The 8 of Swords, and the Ace of Vessels (Aether)

"Resist the temptation to look back at your past. Instead, seek fulfillment in the present moment. Be happy with the progress you had made for yourself. Instead of dwelling in the feelings of entrapment, and the negative thoughts of others, connect to your inner self for this is where your light is. This is where enlightenment is obtained."

So, in translation, your past is your past. You're not defined by it nor should you be entrapped by it and the negative thoughts that spung from it. The answers that you seek are within you. Within you is where you gain the enlightenment you need.

So I asked my spirit team what else can you tell me.

They pulled the following cards:

The 3 of Wands, The 8 of Wands and the Queen of Vessels.

"It is better with slow growth then no growth. Better slow progress than no progress. For both stages of your life intertwine quickly, you had gained both perpectives rather quickly. Through these stages, you had learned. You started to use your intuition in order to be receptive and in tune to what the Universe has for you."

Gamaliel.

The qlipha that corresponds to the sephira Yesod on the Tree of Life. If Yesod is associated with the male, then Gamaliel is female. The unconscious desires sexual or otherwise that erupts from this qlipha is also a thing. Lilith rules this sphere by being the undercurrent that runs this world. The shadow of the world’s soul otherwise known as the anima mundi, it is more of a dream sphere. In which contains dreams, memories and such that man wishes not to remember. It reveals a character pushed deep withing oneself in order to avoid being embarrassed by society and also reveals sides of oneself that one does not want to accept. Here in this qlipha, is where these dreams are censored and repressed by ego and pushed into the deepest darkness.

What desires had emerged from the unconscious?

Self- sabotage. Self-conflict. Scarity mindset.

Lilith.

This is where the initiate will meet the first guides/allies on this new journey. From here, it begins the trials and tribulations of the Qliphoth. Dante begin his journey here accompanied by Vergil. In this case, it's whoever your deity/guide/ally is. The Qlipha from my experience is like a dark cave with really dim lighting. The water is like acid, the smoke that rose from it burned my skin, the place smelled like sulfur. However, it burned my nostils. I knew better than to breathe through my mouth. Otherwise, I would've burned my lungs or caught something from this astral realm. So no thank you. There were astral impressions of fire to include some stakes burning from a distance. Lilith appeared as a huge vampiric figure who just placed her hand on my heartspace and triggered unwanted memories from within. My spirit feel to the floor, shivering like I was cold while my mind raced and projected memories that I've pushed in and didn't want to face.

How did this qlipha manifest in the physical realm?

Where can I start?