iris 🌠

How does it feel to be part of a suicide mission?

Well, that was a question you never thought you would know the answer to.

That was, until you joined the mission Project Hail Mary

Since that day, you were constantly reminded of your unavoidable demise.

You were stuck on a ship, lost in space, with two members of your team already dead.

You had no one, except for your recently awoken coworker, Dr. Ryland Grace.

Knock, knock, knock.

The banging of the door to your room startled you awake, and you sat up quickly in response.

"Rise and shine!" Ryland exclaimed, swinging open the door to your dormitory that kept you away from the reality of your current predicament.

You rolled your eyes and groaned, letting your head flop back onto your pillow.

"Dr. y/n is awake, question?" You heard your new found friend, Rocky, ask from outside of the room.

"Hmm... Debatable." Ryland answered, making his way next to your bed, but not before flipping your lights on as he walked over.

You groaned again, covering your eyes with your hands in response to the painfully bright overhead light.

"Can't we all just sleep? For like... a while?" You asked, exhaustion lacing your body and voice.

Ryland chuckled at the question, "Afraid not, m'lady." he joked, gently placing his hands on yours and pulling them off of your eyes.

You squinted your eyes together at the light that you could no longer block out, and let out a deep sigh.

You felt the bed shift as Ryland took a seat on the edge, before looking down at you and lightly smiling at you as you opened your eyes again.

You felt your cheeks warm up and you couldn't help smile back.

You pulled one hand out of his and lightly smacked his arm, reminding him that you still didn't appreciate the interruption to your sleep, but you both remained smiling nonetheless.

He chuckled at your actions, then continued to watch you for a moment before speaking again.

"Good morning," He said quietly with a soft smile that made your heart ache, while his eyes continued to gaze over your sleepy state.

"Yeah, yeah, good morning." You responded, suddenly growing shy at the warmth in his voice and the feeling of his hand still laced with your own.

Though Dr. Ryland Grace could be a socially awkward idiot, you couldn't help but feel something ignite inside of your chest whenever he spoke to you. While it could have just been the comfort of having someone around, deep down, you knew that there was more to it.

Maybe it was the fact that the two of you had been stranded in space for a while, but the way his stupid face always seemed to light up when he saw you made it very hard to ignore the flutter in your stomach.

"Rocky and I have something to show you." He stated, breaking you from your trance and pulling on the hand he was still holding, helping you to sit up.

"Well it better be pretty amazing if you needed to wake me up for it." You joked, but you were already intrigued at his statement.

"Oh you'll be amazed," He winked. You let out a small chuckle and rolled your eyes at his never-ending attempts to make you smile. "Oh, and bring your suit." He said, making you raise an eyebrow in curiosity as he walked out of your room, shutting the door.

After changing into new clothes and tying your space suit around your waist, you made your way out into the corridor of the ship.

"Hello, y/n friend!" Rocky greeted you, bouncing around as per usual.

"Morning, rock." You smiled at the creature, or... whatever he was.

Ryland quickly swiveled his chair around at the sound of you, looking at you above the frames of his glasses.

"'Bout time." He stood, zipping up his space suit and signaling for you to do the same.

Just before you could enter the airlock, you noticed an odd glow coming from the window beside you.

You turned your head to see what it was that had caught your eye, and your mouth instantly dropped at the realization.

A neon green planet sat massively beside you, with pockets of orange swirls littering the surface, creating an absurdly bright, beautiful, sight.

You let your eyes widen at what you saw, as you turned to look at Ryland, who was already smiling at you.

"What the fuck is that?" You said in disbelief.

He simply chuckled and pushed his glasses higher up his nose, "I could tell you, or I could just show you." he shrugged.

Without responding, you scrambled to prepare yourself to exit the ship.

He did the same, but much more calm and collected than you seemed to be at the moment.

"Grace shows y/n Adrian, question?" Rocky asked, as Ryland nodded at him.

"That's right, Rocky." He responded, as you opened the airlock in preparation to leave.

"Excitement! Excitement!" Rocky bounced around at the response.

You listened to them before asking, "Adrain?" Your eyebrows threaded together at the new term.

Ryland looked at you and smiled, "That's what we named it." He grabbed your hand and lead you to the exit of the ship, after making sure that you were both strapped in.

You stepped out into the endless sky, hand in hand, as the bright green planet sat before you. Large, beautiful, and completely real.

You let out a long breath at the vision of the planet, letting everything else disappear around you.

You had never imagined that you would actually have success on this mission, and before Ryland was woken up, you had accepted that fate.

At home on Earth, your family frequently told you that it was stupid to go on a mission that you couldn't return from, but you knew that if your death could save someone, anyone, (especially the whole planet), it would be worth it.

Ever since Ryland woke up, you had already discovered so much more together than you ever could on your own.

From stumbling across the Blip-A, to finding a literal alien that you could communicate with, your life had changed in a matter of months.

All because of him.

And now, you had found a whole planet.

As you floated there silently with his hand in yours, you let your mind wander everywhere except for the literal ginormous orb right in front of you.

You thought about Earth, and the repetitive routine you used to follow every single day.

You thought about the day you were offered a position to assist with something they called 'Project Hail Mary'.

And finally, you thought about your family.

You missed them.

They begged you endlessly not to go on the mission, but you had your heart set, and they knew they couldn't change it.

You thought about the phone calls you would receive from them each week before you left.

You thought about the hugs they gave you every time you went your separate ways.

And you thought about the last hug you gave them.

The last hug you would ever give them.

Your chest tightened at the reminder, as your eyes stayed fixed on the planet in front of you. After a few minutes, Ryland spoke, quieting your thoughts.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" He questioned the silence, before turning to look at you and noticing the tears beginning to well up in your eyes.

"Oh shit, are you okay? Wait, stupid question. Um, What can I do? Should I have told you sooner?-" He began to ramble, before you cut him off by laughing at his nervousness.

"It's okay, Grace" You sniffled, looking at him properly for the first time since you had left the ship. "It's just... a lot."

He nodded and kept his eyes fixed on yours, "Yeah, I know."

You turned your head back to the glowing, swirling, planet.

It looked like unlike anything you had ever seen before.

Ryland's hand sat heavy in yours, in the most comforting, considerate way imaginable.

He always seemed to find a way to remind you that you aren't alone.

Even though, technically speaking, you two were about as alone as people could be.

Whether he was holding your hand, or letting you sleep next to him during a particularly difficult night, he was always there.

And you never wanted him to not be there.

You both floated there for what felt like hours, hand in hand, before you eventually spoke up again.

"So Adrain, huh?" You shook your head, smiling.

"Yeah, Adrian." He began, "We named it after Rocky's... lady rock." He tried to explain.

You giggled, and glanced over at him before looking back.

"Well, it really is beautiful." You said, allowing yourself to capture the memory in your mind as well as you could.

"Yeah, it is." He sighed, but his eyes had never left you.

He watched the light from the planet reflecting onto your eyes, and you had felt him grip your hand a bit tighter than before.

After a moment of peaceful silence, you looked at him again. He was still staring at you as if you were the best discovery he had ever made, completely disregarding the whole planet in front of him.

"Do you wanna go back in?" He finally spoke, and you only nodded at the question.

Once you had both made it back into the ship, you and Ryland both tied your suits around your waists, and you went to sit in front of the window that Adrian shone right through.

"Y/n like Adrian, Question?" Rocky said, once you had both settled back into the room.

"Y/n loves Adrian. Statement." You said, looking back at Rocky and Ryland, smiling.

Ryland's cheeks heated up, as he made his way to sit next to you in front of the window.

He took his place on the floor next to you, extending his legs in front of him and his arms behind him to hold himself up.

He looked at you in the eyes for a moment, before turning his head, saying, "Rocky, can you leave for a second?"

Rocky shifted his stance, before claiming, "One second over."

You giggled at the alien, as Ryland rolled his eyes and let his head fall back.

"No, like... oh my god." He said, running a hand down his face.

"Rocky, can you just give us a few minutes alone?" You ask, still smiling at the alien's confusion.

"Rocky leave for some minutes. Y/n and Grace talk." Rocky said, rolling out of the room.

You giggled as Ryland turned back towards you, shaking his head.

"That little guy will be the death of me." He sighed, before smiling and beginning to laugh as well.

You turned your head to face the window again, and this time, Ryland did the same.

After a few moments of familiar silence, he exhaled, "Honestly, maybe this wouldn't be the worst place to die."

You pulled your crossed legs up to your chest, hugging your arms around your knees. "You're not wrong."

"I'm never wrong." He joked before looking at you again, taking in your relaxed, yet melancholic, state.

"What's been bothering you?" He asked, concerned about your recent breakdown outside of the ship.

You sighed and looked towards him again, "I just can't really fathom it," You blinked back a few tears, "My family didn't believe in the mission. I just... wish they could know about everything we've done."

He slowly nodded in understanding, "They will know."

Your chest ached as you mustered up the air to speak, "They didn't want me to go."

Ryland swore he felt his heart break at the pain in your voice.

"I'm sure they didn't," he started, hearing you sniffle again. He placed a solid hand on your knee, "you'd be a hard person to lose." He looked down at his feet stretched in front of him.

You turned to look at his face while a familiar warmth ran up your spine, "You really think so?"

"I know so." He looked back up, finding your eyes as his began to form their own tears.

You tried to smile at him, but felt your mouth pull downwards into a frown. "I could say the same about you, Ryland."

He lets out a shaky exhale and shakes his head, trying to fight his own tears by looking out the window, "I don't really have a family."

"Well..." You started, trying to find the right words, "either way, I know that I never want to lose you."

Silence sat between the two of you for a moment, before he slowly turned his face to look at you again, a new softness capturing his features.

He lifted a hand to softly rest against your cheek for a moment.

You both began to pull towards each other, slowly closing your eyes and resting your foreheads against one another.

"I never want to lose you either, y/n." He said, allowing your breathing to mix in the small space between your mouths, before leaning in and slowly closing the distance between you.

You graciously accepted the kiss, gently pressing your lips against his and exhaling at the sensation of tension finally breaking.

He moved the hand resting on your cheek to the back of your head, gently grasping your hair to pull your face farther into his own as you opened your mouth more, allowing him to press his lips firmly into yours.

After another moment, you felt your tears coat your cheeks, while some made their way onto Ryland's face in the process.

You shifted your weight to your knees so you could wrap your arms around his neck. As you tangled one hand into his hair, you heard a light shuffling from the other room before you could pull apart.

"Grace and y/n done, Question?"

Ryland jumped away at the sudden interruption, his cheeks burning bright red.

You slowly moved away from him, biting your lip to fight back a smile at Rocky's impeccable timing.

"Yeah, uh... Yeah, we're done." He stuttered, scratching the back of his head with the hand that was just tangled in your hair.

"Grace is nervous. Why?" Rocky titled his head. You couldn't help but let out a giggle at the alien's unintentional teasing.

"Nope... I'm just... yeah, I'm good." He stood up and turned away from you both to hide his beat red face.

"Grace like y/n. No..." Rocky paused, making you both turn to look at him, "Grace loveee y/n, statement."

You bursted out in laughter, turning to Ryland, who was now rolling his eyes and shooing Rocky away with his hand.

"Shut up, you big boulder." He said, making you laugh even harder.

The night continued on with shared, intentional glances between you and Ryland, as Rocky observed and occasionally commented on Ryland's increased temperature or your quickened heart rate.

So... what was it like to be part of a suicide mission?

Well, when you had Dr. Ryland Grace and a mysterious alien friend... maybe it wasn't so bad.