soyuz

let it be known he is chilling like crazy

I’ve never been to Las Vegas but I love it in concept because it sounds so made up. Imagine if you were reading a fantasy novel and they were like “smack in the middle of a deadly inhospitable desert there is a glittering city of indulgence and lawlessness and cheap sin that has specifically engineered itself to obfuscate your sense of time and keep you there as long as possible while they take all your valuables.” You’d be like yeah that’s some wizard shit. 

oh no im wearing a skirt and i stepped over this vent in the sidewalk thats blowing air and my skirt billowed out and lifted me up into the air and i glided over the city and everyone saw my hoo hoo

what if ur finger was suddenly 300000 kilometers long

it's such a bummer that losing control of your emotions only makes the entire situation worse in really embarrassing personal ways. losing control of my emotions should give me pyrokinesis.

why is trying to make a new friend so embarrassing. hi. me again. asking for your attention once more even though i am literally just some random person to you. it's because i want to be not just a random person to you. please understand

Bong water leak in Gulf mexico leaves thousands of birds and fish critically chill

casual survey: reblog if you want to kiss a girl right now

the desire to pronounce words as they are said in their source language for the sake of accuracy vs the desire to not sound like a complete tool

it always always makes me laugh to swap definite and indefinite articles

Ugh it's so hot today, I'm sweating like the pig

W-woah there! You scared a bejesus out of me!